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matt: welcome, everyone, to this thursday's episode of critical role, where a bunch of us nerdy-ass voice actorsget together and play dungeons & dragons. this will be our 10th episode, i think, which is awesome. for all the classic folksthat have been coming every week, good to see you again; for a bunch of newcomers out there as well, welcome and thank you.i hope you enjoy. we're going to cut to some videos here.probably the last time that we run the character backstoriesat the start of the show. we usually use itas partially a stall method

when some of our playershaven't gotten here on time. (clears throat) i.e., scanlan.but he's on his way, i'm sure. but also since we havea lot of new people watching, and we figured it would be coolfor them to actually get an idea of the character backgrounds, as well, but going forward, we'll just be playing themfor the intermission break. so we'll be back herein about 10 minutes or so. in the meantime,enjoy the character backstories. we'll see you guys in just a moment.

[dramatic music] ashley: pike grew up on the outskirts of town, near the bramblewood. her ancestors were a family of deep gnomes with quite an unfavorable reputation. thievery, destruction, and trickery left them with the curse of the last name trickfoot. sarenrae, the goddess of healing and redemption, had other plans for pike's great-great-grandfather wilhand,

who left his family at a young ageafter a dream, a dream that changed the course of the trickfoot family. wilhand devoted his life to sarenraeand pledged from then on that him and his familywould live a life of service and devotion. as a child, pike seemed to have an affinity to heal. whether it was animals, people, or even flowers, she felt she had a purpose in making things whole that had once been broken. she studied and learned the ways to heal though divine magic.

she lived a peaceful life, quiet and simple, until one day, wilhand was captured and almost killed by a group of goliath barbarians. one of the goliaths took a standagainst the murder of the innocent gnome and he himself was beaten, bloodied, and left for dead, abandoned by his herd. wilhand went to pike for help. she prayed and healed this barbarianas best she could, bringing him back to life. when he awoke, she discovered his name was grog strongjaw.

after that, they were best of friends,a rather unlikely pair. little did she know that in a few years' time, grog would soon return the favor and bring her back from the clutches of death. (roar, crunch) after being killed in battle, pike felt angry. she wanted to be strongerso that it would never happen again. she spent four months at sea training with the men and womenaboard a ship called the broken howl.

gripping her holy symbol in one hand,and her morningstar in the other, this time, pike is ready. travis: right, listen up! if you have ale, then you have a friend in grog strongjaw. a goliath of towering height and size, this barbarian has an appetite for the two great loves in his life: combat, women, and ale! (chuckle) (record scratch) wait. easily the brains of the group, grog is often consulted

for his vast knowledge of shapes, colors, and (chuckle) shiny things! also ale. in his early years, armed with his two-handed great axe, grog often enjoyed proving his might amongst the ranks of his family's wandering herd. but after coming upon an unsuspecting elderly gnome in the woods, he objected to the killing of such an innocent life. a creature of impulse, grog felt only pity for this-- well, this terrified little thing.

and his disobedience cost him dearly. beaten bloody and banished by the herd leader, his uncle kevdak, grog was abandoned and left to die. exiled from his herd, it was then that the relative of the very gnome he fought to save, saved him. it was the kindness of a gnome cleric named pike that healed grog, bringing him back from death's edge. and they have remained close friends ever since.

most nights, grog can be found challenging entire taverns to wrestling matches! ha! or accompanying scanlan to the nearest house where you pay for… lady favors. also ale! marisha: a first impression of keyleth would leave you with little informationon the half-elven druid. you might even think that her social awkwardness due to her sheltered upbringing is kind of sweet. (chuckle)

of course, it would be unwise to underestimate her based on first impressions.(thunder) under that unintimidating petite frame is a vicious beast waiting to be unleashed, whose natural powershave made even the fiercest of champions pee their pants, literally! (soft chuckle) born to the air tribe of the ashari people, keyleth was raised with a deep loveof nature and the elemental magics. it is her people's inherent duty

to protect the delicate areas in tal'dorei where the four elemental planes begin to bleed with this realm. since she was a little girl, she had quite a knack for air manipulation and beast shaping abilities. well, if you consider kittens and flying squirrels to be little beasts. which, i do. (clears throat) anyways, it wasn't long before the headmaster of the tribe, her father, korren,realized her true prodigious abilities and she was inveterated to succeed him as the next headmaster.

just like that, her jovial childhood was stripped and replaced with endless spell memorization, teachings from ancient traditions, and exceedingly high expectations. every druid leader to be must embark on journey to seek out the sister tribes in order to introduce and establish respect amongst the fellow headmasters. they call this the aramente, or noble odyssey. when her father felt she was ready,

he set her on the path to truly discovering herself, not knowing when, or if, she will ever return. as she hiked down the mountain towards stillben, she meditated on the task ahead. part of the aramente is proving yourself a strong warrior, a valiant protector, and a wise and compassionate leader. with this knowledge, one thought plays on repeat in her mind: is she even worthy?

taliesin: percy was the thirdof seven children, born to a noble family who lived far to the north in the ancient castle of whitestone. with so many siblings to share the burdens of lordship, percy turned his attentions to the sciences, engineering, and naturalism. one day, a mysterious couple named lord and lady briarwood came to court. during a feast held in their honor, the briarwoods violently took control of the castle,

killing or imprisoning everyone who would stand in their way. percy awoke chained in the dungeon, only to be freed by his younger sister. together they fled, chased by the briarwoods' men. as they ran, percy's sister took several arrows to the chest and fell. percy kept running, eventually jumping into a freezing river and floating unconscious to freedom. he did not remember waking up on a fishing boat. he barely remembered the next two years, as he slowly made his way as far south as possible.

then one night, percy had a dream. a roaring cloud of smoke offered him vengeance against those who destroyed his family. when he awoke, percy began to design his first gun. (gunshot) sam: oh, you haven't heard of scanlan shorthalt? well, gird your loins, ladies, because he has his eye on you. a talented musician, master of disguise,and dashingly handsome in his own mind, scanlan sings songs almost as much as he sings his own praises.

born a poor gnome, scanlan used his endless charm and soaring tenor voice to croon for coin and support his single mother. one day he was discovered by a half-orc promoter, and joined dr. dranzel's spectacular traveling troupe, where he learned the ways of the world, and honed his skills as a bard extraordinaire. a loner much of his life, scanlan has never quite come to terms with the violent death of his mother at the hands of a goblin invasion. while his years on the road provided many, shall we say,

educational experiences with the opposite sex, deep down, scanlan yearns for the one thing he's never known: the true love of a fellow gnome. still, scanlan considers himself a lover first, performer second, and fighter distant third. on the battlefield, he'll support his allies, but rarely draws blood, unless it's to protect fellow gnome, pike. count on scanlan for a hearty laugh, a rollicking song,

and a twinkle in his eye that melts hearts and makes the females swoon. orion: greetings and salutations. i am tiberius stormwind. i hail from a town called ty'rex, located in the heart of draconia. from a politically respected family, at the age of 15, i succeeded in passing the sorcerer's rite, showing prodigy-like control of my magic. the judges and the draconian high council were amazed at how powerful my spells were for how long i had been training.

at 20 years old, i was the youngest appointed member of the magic guild in draconian history. for the next few years, i almost went mad from the malaise of being a guild member, as it's rather boring. however, one day i happened upon a chamber, unused for quite some time. in the room were stacks of books and maps of the surrounding cities and areas around the known world.

for months, i would frequent the chamber, and learned of artifacts from legend. after a long period of research, i made a list of artifacts that caught my eye. i brought these findings to the high council and was told that all of the information in the chamber i had stumbled upon was either believed to be fiction, or unsolvable mysteries, and hence were lost forever.

i found those answers to be unacceptable. a year later, i devised a ruse and managed to convince the city council to lend support in me leaving draconia on a mission of peace and diplomacy for the surrounding kingdoms. going from town to town and making friends and allies, in and for the name of draconia. being a red dragonborn, i had quite the task on my hands in that respect, but it was exactly what i needed

so i could explore the world and find these artifacts, as i felt the truth was out there. some may describe me as buffoonish, but i say poppycock to all that. i am much sharper than most give me credit for. i just don't pay attention to things sometimes. i've also been known to be rather cunning, loyal, happy-go-lucky, and well, dangerous. i can't help but show my true scales every now and then. but overall, i think i'm quite friendly for a dragonborn!

liam: never entirely welcome in the company of elves or men, vax'ildan learned at a young age to skip past formality, preferring instead to invite himself in your door. along with twin sister vex'ahlia, vax was born by a chance encounter between elven royalty and human peasantry. raised by their mother in their early years, the twins were eventually sent off to their father in the elven capital of syngorn. but their cool reception among the elves there never warmed,

and their time in the capital didn't last. the siblings stole away one autumn night and set out on the open road. after a few years of wandering, they eventually decided to return to their mother, and journeyed back to the lands of their youth. but instead of finding their childhood home, they returned to a pile of rubble. their mother was gone, their home burned to ash. pressing the townspeople for answers,

they learned of the day the dragon came. (roar) with their ties all severed, vax'ildan and his sister set out to find their fortune together in tal'dorei. an outsider since birth, vax quickly learned to solve life's challenges in his own particular way, often by side-stepping them entirely. and when his knack for circumventing adversity isn't enough, (knife scraping)

the way of blades the elves schooled him in more than makes up the difference. laura: like so many half-elves, vex'ahlia has spent most of her life suffering the cool reception of a people who don't fully accept her. born of a human motherand an elven father who only later in life took an interest in their existence, vex'ahlia and her twin brother vax'ildan quickly realized the only people they could truly rely on in this world were each other.

it was at the age of tenwhen the two were taken from their mother and brought to live in syngorn, the isolated elven city for which their father was an ambassador. he quietly took them in, but always kept an icy distance, and after too many years of disdainful looks, the pair decided to leave his indifference behind, and set out on their own. vax took to the cities, stealing small trinkets and learning the ways of the thief,

while vex kept to the woods;she preferred the isolation. always the keen observer, she learned to hunt and to track, to spy and to shoot. and through a series of fateful events, earned herself a companion in the form of a bear-- her own stolen trinket-- to fight alongside her and protect her fiercely. also, he is adorable, and gives expert massages. matt: hello, everyone!welcome back to critical role.

first off, i want to thank the chatfor buying this amazing cloak. this most delightfuldungeon master cloak. taliesin: it makes your eyes pop. matt: does it? it makes morethan my eyes pop. (laughs) so thank you, chat, that's amazing.we did some videos with that. it's a little warm in here for itat the moment, but i'll be wearing it probably when we come backfrom the break for a bit, too. thank you. a couple other quick things.first off, our shirts are up still. we have one more week on that,but our goal

by the end of this show tonightis to get to 1,000 t-shirts sold. if we get to 1,000before the end of the game tonight, we are going to stay afterand do a q&a with you guys. so, go ahead and get some shirts. wonderfully modeledby a few of our team members here. you can find a link in the chat room, or you can go toteespring.com/critical-role and they've got hoodies,girl tees, guy tees. rock it out. liam: 999 gets nothing!

matt: well, we'll see.so yes, that's awesome. also, we have the subscriber giveaway. as soon as we hit 2,850 tonight,we are going to be giving away one of the tabletop day promo kitsthat are only available exclusively now by subscribing to this channel. so, once we hit 2,850,we are going to give away one of these to one of the random folksin the chat room, so look forward to that. also, we have our charity,which we do throughout the show. marisha do you wantto take it away on that?

marisha: yes. 826la, which is a non-profit, after-school tutoring programfor kids k-12th grade. they excel in creative writingand reading. they're awesome. donate to them.go check them out. and there might be an 826 in your area,so google 826. they're always looking for tutors.it's a good program. matt: go check it out.a couple of other quick things. if you guys haven't checked it out,recently i had the opportunity to dungeon master for pewdiepie

and cinnamontoastken,his co-partner on the podcast there. episode went up a couple of days ago.had a lot of fun. hopefully, we'll be doing thatagain in the future, but i know probably a bunch of you folkscame through that this week, so welcome! welcome to our chaotic little show,critical role. everyone in the chat room:be nice, be welcoming. they've been really awesome. any other announcements we want to makebefore we jump into the game? orion: yeah. have we talkedabout something important here, guys?

there are these shirtsthat we need to sell. laura: we just talked about them. sam: for five minutes.we literally just talked about that. orion: listen, guys, this is somethingthat we need to really discuss, first. travis: that was amazing.he comes in character! (all laugh) orion: i love you, travis travis: i love you. i love you! orion: i think you guys out thereneed to really look in your hearts--

and moreover, your wallets--and get one of our shirts. just get them, because they're dope. matt: glowing recommendationfrom tiberius stormwind. taliesin: i likethat you two match, actually. laura: the episode of dread part 2came out today-- of tabletop. it's so intense! you can watch iton geek & sundry. i'm not telling you anything,but it's very intense! taliesin: we can't talk about anything. sam: did we talk about the shirts?

orion: i don't think we did. matt: let's get this on the road, then,so we can get into the story. laura: i'm so nervous!travis: (laughing) i don't want to live. matt: so. to get everyone caught upto where we are... the party was initially sent on a quest into the mountainous regionbeneath the dwarven city of kraghammer to find a folk hero of the regionnamed lady kima of vord, who's a halfling paladinwho had gone missing while on a vision questthat had apparently led her to some evil

that was brewing beneath the city. as the party went in search of her,they ended up finding themselves climbing deeper and deeperinto the underdark, a very scary portionof the subterranean world, encountering numerous beastsand talking cellphones. orion: sorry. sam: disadvantage. matt: discovering that there was apparently an alliance that had been forged between the illithids,

the mind flayers that lived down there, and the duergar, who normally are at odds.they've forged some sort of pact. upon battling their way deeper into the cavernous regionsbelow the lava-encrusted obsidian walls, they began to uncover a plotthat apparently some monstrosity, some new dark leaderby the name of k'varn had been the one responsiblefor uniting them and currently residesin a temple in the center of the subterranean illithid cityof yug'voril.

you guys made your way downto what seems to be the cavern that contains the islandthat yug'voril resides upon. you manage to scavenge a few broken boatsfrom the lake that surrounds the island. percy repaired them,and you rode around the outskirts to what seemed to besome sort of a beach-side cavern. upon entering the cavern, you found a partially-buried chestor container of some kind in what looks like a campthat had been destroyed and scattered, and a few rotting corpsesagainst the walls.

as you continued to inspect the area, the corpses began to risefrom their sitting positions. with previous experiencein the realm of undead, you, however, knowthat these eyes of these creatures carry far more intelligencethan your run-of-the-mill zombie. and that was where we left offat this point in time, which requires a music change. ashley: oh, just jumping right in?laura: just right into it. matt: right in.

we have a good number of the partythat is still out in the boat that is being towed by keyleth,currently in shark form. ashley: we're in a boat?taliesin: we're in a boat. ashley: i'm in a boat.i'm in a motherfucking boat. matt: there's keyleth's shark form. laura: where? awesome. matt: right there. so in the cavern,i believe we had vax, we had scanlan. tiberius and vex on the flying carpetand are making their way down.

you scouted ahead and began to check the interior before this happened. so, these creaturesare now rising up off the ground, looking insidious in their expression,all glaring at you, as you're the mostapparently-nearby individual. what are you doing? laura: you have fuzz in your hair.matt: and it's going to stay! laura: no you got it. it's gone.matt: aw, damn it. matt: i was hoping it would bother youfor the rest of the game.

so, that being the case, we're jumping right into battleat the top of this game in the center of this beach-side cavern.roll initiative, everybody. travis: shit.laura: god. sam: first roll of the night. yeah!travis: fuck yes. taliesin: bam. marisha: new dice. not bad.sam: (wordless squeal) matt: all right, so top of the round.who's got 25 to 20? anybody? taliesin: 25.matt: ooh! percy with the rolls.

matt: okay, so 25--travis and laura: 20. matt: 20 and 20 for grog and vex. all right. 20 to 15? orion: 16.matt: 16 for tiberius. matt: 15 to ten? liam: a really strong 13.matt: a really strong 13 for vax. marisha: 12. for the shark.matt: all right. sam: me and pike.worst rollers in the game. matt: (laughs) don't say that.you got this. you'll be fine.

sam: well, we roll well when it counts. ashley: yeah, but for initiative,we always roll less. matt: well, that's the plate armor and--i don't know why. and what have you guys got,initiative-wise? sam: four.ashley: oh, wow. i got seven. matt: pike, then scanlan.all right, so top of the round. percy, you're out in the ship.are you going to stay on the ship? taliesin: (garbled) no.matt: (laughs) taliesin: (garbled) these cookiesare really good!

matt: i know. timing is everything.what are you doing? quick! taliesin: i'm going to tug on the ropethree times in succession to let our shark friend knowthat it's time to boogie. i'm going to take the rope.i'm going to jump out of the boat. is there anything to tie the rope to? matt: this beach is just gravel.there's no particular physical element. maybe on the far end,there might be a part of the wall, but it's going to be an awkward hinge,and there's really nowhere to latch-- taliesin: is there somethingthat if i had an adhesive that i could--

matt: well, if you have an adhesive,you might be able to stick it to the wall at the far end of the beach--the cavern wall that you're up against-- but there's nothingactually on the beach floor at all. taliesin: i'm going to attemptto take the piece of rope, place it against the wall, and take an ice shotslightly above the rope and freeze it to the wall. matt: okay. so as you hold it up, you line up your enchanted ice chamberof your pepperbox,

fire, and with an extremely loud echoing(gun noise) gun shot sound throughout the cavern,you see a blast. the bullet itself ricochetsand spins off into the distance, into the darkness,but you do see left behind, where part of the rockhas chiseled from the impact, ice has coalesced and cracked and has, for the time being, held the rope to the edge of the cavern. taliesin: i'm running in,for the rest of my movement. matt: all right, so percy is there.

percy, it's going to take youa few rounds to get there. it's long, winding pathway, but you're in the processof making your way there. all right, great, so that brings usto grog and vex. grog and vex, what have you got? travis: would you like to go?laura: well, you're outside. you can go. travis: is the boat beached on the shore yet? matt: no, the boat is not beached.the rope that the boat is attached to is currently attached to the wall,so it's anchored.

travis: okay, good.ashley: and i'm in the boat? matt: you're in the boat. grog's in the boat. clarota, kima... travis: i would like to bust outat a full dead sprint after percy. "there's no blood being had without me!" matt: as grog leaps out,(sploosh) splashing. it's shallow at this point.you're about waist deep in the water. you trudge up to the shore,run across the gravel beach, and start heading straight into the cavern after percy. travis: screaming.

matt: yelling into the cavern,a big old goliath scream. laser pointer if anyone needs it,by the way. there you go. all right, that brings us to vex. laura: which one looks biggest? matt: you're still on topof the flying carpet, the three of you. laura: does one of the ghoulslook scarier than the others? matt: best you can tell, there are threethat all look similar in stature. there's one over herethat is generally larger, taller, more lanky, and appears to have a semblance of armor on him still.

and he almost seems to be giving looksand silent commands to the others. laura: he's a master zombie.hunter's mark him. matt: what's the range on hunter's mark?you're back here. taliesin: hey, laura!laura: i did it! laura: hunter's mark, 90 feet.matt: yeah, you can get there. laura: okay, good. well, i don't need it because i'm going to conjure barrage a cone at them all once he's hunter's marked. sam: barrage a cone?sounds like an italian porn guy.

matt: hunter's mark on that one. laura: while i whistle for trinketto get his butt in. matt: trinket's ears perk upfrom the distance. he can hear your whistleechoing through the cavern on the beach side.he stumbles out of the boat, (sploosh) big splash,and chases after grog. laura: okay, and then i conjure barrage. matt: all wet and soaked,the fur pushed against the body. conjure barrage.what's the range of that?

laura: it's a 60-foot cone. matt: you are quite a distancefrom most of them. you might haveto hop off the flying carpet. laura: i will?! orion: she can move it just fine.just think, "forward." laura: can we fly the carpet forward? matt: you're currentlynot in control of the carpet. tiberius is. laura: can i delay until--what's your initiative? orion: well, 16, but that's fine.

laura: i'll delay until his. can i do that? matt: you can do that.vex delays on that. grog's turn's ended. all right, so the undead take their turn.so as all the entities rise up, they all swarm in,rushing around with an unnatural speed. liam: age ain't slowing them down nothing!wow. hi, fellas! matt: they all leap up.you see portions of their jaw dangling, with these sharp, awful blackened teeththat are broken and gnarled. liam: i feel so popular! matt: you glance around suddenlyas this darkened room,

which you're able to makea little bit of light from tiberius's lighton the end of his staff. they move (whoosh) with a blur of speed,and they're right up in your face. taliesin: 28 days later zombies. laura: oh, god.get out of the middle of them. matt: first thing you notice: one of them is giving off an awful stench. the smell you smelledwhen you first entered the cavern is now so strongthat it's nearly overpowering. liam: is there one specifically?

matt: it's hard to find a source to it. however, you are taking a claw strikefrom each of them. liam: oh, good. matt: that is going to be a six.that misses. matt: that is a 19?liam: yeah. matt: hits. 18?liam: yeah. matt: and then 20.liam: hell yeah. matt: all right. so, three claw strikes. you take seven points of slashing damage,another seven points of slashing damage,

and then a ten, so that's a total of 24 points of slashing damage. liam: okay. (grunts) matt: as all these horribly-muddiedand half-rotted claws start sinking past the armorinto your flesh, the back of your neck. one catches you in the side.and it all happens so fast, you feel like you're almost spun aroundby the sheer force of the impact. i need you to makethree constitution saving throws. sam: they've got poison or something. they've got poison magic. liam: okay. 15.laura: okay. plus your constitution.

liam: plus nothing.laura: oh really?! liam: it's all in speed, man. 15.matt: 15. liam: six.matt: all right. liam: 19.matt: okay. matt: okay. so, two of the impacts,you feel this sense of strange rot impeding upon your system,and you shrug it off, but one of them still managesto sift through, and your system seizes. you feel all the muscles in your bodybegin to tighten up, and suddenly you are unable to move.

your entire bodyis one tense, giant, flexing muscle, and you're unable to shift anywherefrom your position. liam: (strained) feels like rigor mortis. matt: you're currently paralyzed, my friend. laura: oh no, i can't do anything.you won't be able to dodge it. matt: yeah, all right.that brings us to tiberius and vex. liam: send a fireball right here. laura and sam: no!travis: that would be bad. orion: how far away am i right now?

matt: right here?i'd say you're approximately-- orion: well, i'll move the carpet the minimum distance i have tofor her to get in range. matt: you can probably push it 20 feet.it's about there. orion: okay, so that's where i'll stay."this doesn't look good." i cast obelisk of stoneon my dear friend. (fshh) i'm going to raise him upout of harm's way. matt: all right. so, as you finish casting, you can see some of the actual sandthat fills the bottom of this cave

begins to swirl up in a windaround tiberius's hands, and as he lifts his arms up, a single column of stone shakesand shifts out of the ground, lifting your paralyzed body15 feet into the air. thankfully, the actual cavern itselfis about 25 feet tall, so it doesn't crush youagainst the ceiling. orion: no, i only raise it about 20 feet. matt: it can only go 15 feet for level 3.or 20. i'm sorry. 20 feet. so, you're barelybrought up to the ceiling.

it crests the top of your head, but not enough to actually crush youor do any damage. but you are seemingly out of harm's wayfrom the current undead onslaught. orion: and then i go,"that was a good idea!" and then i spend three sorcerer points and i hock a fireball (fwoosh)at all those fuckers, too. matt: all right, so tiberius,as you lift up the pillar with one hand, the dust settles and falls from your hand,and as it does this hand back here begins to coalescethis small bead of red burning energy.

you fling it out with your off hand. it streaks across,hits the base of the pillar, and explodeswith a blast of red fiery magical energy. go ahead and roll damage. your dc on that is 17, right? orion: yes. two, four, six. is it six or eight? matt: they all failed their saving throw.it's 8d6. sam: 8d6?! jeez. seems unfair. matt: same damageyour lightning bolt does.

sam: oh, you're right.man, i'm a bad mama jama. orion: 32 damage.matt: 32 damage. matt: so. as you guys are runninginto the cavern, you hear this loud,familiar explosion sound that has this weird dull thud.and then flaming heat. you see flickers of lightfrom around the bend, and this wave of heat hits you.the explosion, as it finishes, you can see these three undeadare completely incinerated and are left as burning cinderson the ground.

this one's still standing. however, the force of the explosionalso destroys the pillar from underneath. sam: oh!orion: oh, shit. matt: causing him to fall. orion: hold on, as he falls--do i still have a movement after this? matt: you used your movementto move the carpet, sorry. marisha: it's like the tower of terror. liam: how much bludgeoning damageam i taking? matt: you only take, i'd say, 2d6.liam: okay.

matt: no, 1d6,because it's only a 20-foot fall. liam: right, okay. matt: you're able to catch yourself,and it's also sand, so it's not too hard. all right, that finishes your turn? orion: it certainly does. "vex, would you finish that bastard off?" matt: wait, you did landin a bunch of rocks of the broken pillar. roll another d6 points of damage. liam: that was more substantial. matt: if it was the sand, it wasn't so hard,

but it was the fact that i realizedthere was a whole crapton of pillar rubble that your paralyzed body fell upon,unable to brace your fall. so. that's going to hurt in the morning.vex, you're up. laura: okay. well, there's "no" reallyanybody else, so i'm going to... travis: (teasing) there's "no" really? laura: there's "no" really anybody else--i can shoot through my fire thing, right? matt: if you want to, yeah.you still haven't used it for the day. laura: should i save it? laura: i'll attack him twice.matt: okay, you're attacking him twice.

matt: as you're sitting on the carpet,you pull out (schwoop, schwoop) and rapidly release two arrowsin succession. laura: oh, natural 20! (all cheer) matt: yeah! all right.and what's the other attack? laura: 21. matt: both hit. go ahead and roll damage. laura: hit him. oh, actually, 23.i forgot i had bracers on. matt: that hits. well, the bracers only affect your damage, not to hit.

laura: good to know! 21! matt: you get +2 to all damage rollswith ranged attacks. laura: what do i do for a critical, then? matt: you roll the regular damage,multiply it by two, and then add your modifier at the end. laura: okay. oh, that's not that good.15 for the first one. and 12 for the second one. matt: and hunter's mark on both of those? laura: and hunter's mark on both!matt: because it's on the board? (laughs)

laura: that was definitely a six.that was a six! matt: there you go!laura: seven, then, for hunter's mark. matt: the smoke filters out of the way,and you make the visual. you see your brother on the ground,currently seizing, and in the rubble,you see the shadow of one of the undead, still standing angrily. it rears back with its claws forward and gives this horrible gnashing soundas its jaw opens and actually widens. this long tongue (wet sucking noise)whips out on it. as you bear down and release one arrow,

(shoomf) piercing the sideof its shoulder. as it reaches out to break it off,its tongue still out, the second one goes into the tongue,out the back of the throat. (choking noise) it reaches upand breaks off the arrow in the throat, looks towards you, goes to lunge,and as it does, you can see it just collapses on top of his body,no longer moving. travis: embrace him. embrace him!liam: give me some sugar. matt: all right, so. the rest of you finally make your way into the cavern. you manage to shrug offthe rest of this paralyzation,

stiffly get up,and find your way out of the rubble. laura: can we land? tiberius?orion: i'm sorry. yes. travis: tell me it's not over. sam: oh. sorry, grog. the fight's over.orion: sorry, grog. travis: i live for one thing. ashley: am i close enoughto get out of the boat? matt: yeah, you can get out of the boat. laura: are you alive?liam: i'm alive. matt: keyleth, you're left out thereas a shark as everyone goes inside.

laura: i go look at the treasure chest.sam: i'm going, too! liam: good job, badasses. marisha: i'll stay with the boat. taliesin: all right, that was... fine. ashley: i didn't even needto get out of the boat. you guys just handled it like that. taliesin: i'll go back to the boat, then.it's fine. i don't care. orion: i'm sorry, percy.listen, i'm sorry, everybody. i didn't mean to kill everybody so quickly.

i'll let you kill everybody next time, percy. matt: vex, you go overand lift the top of the chest, which was unlocked previouslyby your brother. as you lift it up, for a split second you see what looks like a flashof orange energy-- a very familiar one, as suddenly, a secondary fire blast(explosion sound) emanates from the treasure chest itself. laura: i thought you checked for traps.liam: i didn't do nothing! (others laugh)

matt: the blast radiussends the top half of the chest careening offand scraping off the roof of the cavern. you guys, who just turned the corner,see this giant explosion, sending you about 20 feet backwards. laura: awesome. good thingyou didn't get there in time, scanlan. liam: is that chestten feet away from me, as well? matt: yeah. so a reflex saving throwfor both of you. laura: okay, cool.liam: i have a thing i can do, too. laura: what's reflex? is that dexterity?

matt: or dexterity, sorry.(sing-song) carry over from pathfinder. i meant dexterity. laura: 30.matt: 30? jesus christ. liam: this is a dexterity check? matt: yeah.liam: 20. matt: you both manage to find a wayto dodge most of the impact, but you still bothtake 14 points of fire damage. liam: as a rogue with evasion,if i succeed, it's nothing. matt: then you take nothing.

laura: as a twin of a rogue... matt: you take 14 points of fire damage. laura: can i have your thingyliam: my thingy? laura: your eraser thingy?liam: i don't know where it is. laura: oh, thanks.ashley: you're welcome. matt: the familiar whine of the trapcatches your ear. you dodge out of the way instinctively.your sister's not so lucky. you take the brunt of the damage,but not the full damage. laura: oh no. did i destroy the loot?

matt: if you want to inspectwhat the chest once was. as you go back to where the chest was,most of the chest is destroyed. it's knocked off its hinge. what you do find inside, though,is what looks like a very, very... there we go. what looks like a slightly-charredtwo-handed blade: a giant swordthat is currently laid inside. looks like it's been therea while in storage. there was a set of natural armor

that's been completely destroyedby the blast. laura: aw, come on! matt: there are a numberof coins in there. there's probably a good,hefty pile of gold, slightly molded by the moisture that's been kept inside this chestuntil it was detonated. gathering it up, you find approximately 420 gold pieces. sam: yeah, 420. liam: what's that mean?is that a reference? what is that?

matt: but for everythingthat was damaged inside the chest, the sword,which would be considered a greatsword, seems to be largely unaffectedby the blast, other than a little bit of sootthat you had to rub off the blade. laura: i'll take it to grog, because i figure he'll probably be able to use it. matt: there you go.she hands you this fantastic sword. laura: i don't knowif it's magic or anything, grog, so you might want to have tiberiushave a look at it.

travis: "hold on, let me check."i take it and i shake it really hard. orion: that's not how you really-- travis: i think i know what i'm doing.all right, here. you can check it. orion: as he's doing that,i get 18 trying to see what's up. matt: okay, there's definitelya magical aura emanating from the blade. you take a moment to inspect it,and you ascertain the magical nature. orion: what you have thereis a greatsword of frenzy, grog. you have a +1 bonusto attack and damage rolls made with this magic weapon.

ooh! when you attack a creaturewith this magic weapon and roll a 20 on the attack roll,after dealing damage, you can immediatelymake an additional attack for free. travis: glad i shook it. laura: pass that piece of paper over here. sam: maybe scanlan could use it. matt: scanlan could.it's a little big for you. you'd be at quite a disadvantageusing this weapon. travis: give it over here.a greatsword of frenzy?

sam: i'd like to rage frenzy. are there any bodiesthat we can look at? matt: you guys were inspecting what remains of three of the undead creatures. they have been turned to ash, pretty much,from the force of the explosion, the arcane nature of the detonation.you find pieces of them. most of them have been charredand burned away from the bodies, who are alreadyin partially-decomposed form. the larger onethat you had hunter's marked, though.

upon inspecting it,while most of its armor is destroyed, it does manage to carrya partially-mildewed coin purse. looking inside, you only find about five or six pieces of gold, but you do find one really, really nice... looks like it's takena little bit of damage, but it was oncea really pretty diamond. laura: i'm just going to keep thiswith the party gold. sam: with the party treasury? oh, sure.laura: plus one diamond to the treasury. orion: "vex, let me see the diamondfor just one second."

as he's shaking his sword, i go into the bag of holdingand take out the mending wheel. laura: did you turn it back into coal?orion: that's not how it works, vex. matt: tiberius, you reachinto the bag of holding. you pull out the mending wheel,which is a magical artifact that you found earlier in the campaignas part of your personal quest. it looks like a large, spoked,roulette wheel when it's laying down, with these strange pointsthat fold out of it. once you spin the wheel,

you place an objectin the center of the wheel. it's lifted without gravity and mends itself back to its undamaged form. you place the diamond in the centerand spin the wheel. you can see the actual crackson the surface of it slowly begin to mend. eventually, the diamond is broughtto a solid, undamaged, finely-cut example of a diamond. laura: whoa, sparkles!orion: there you go. ashley: it's so pretty!

sam: what time of day?matt: you have no idea. sam: how long has it beensince we rested? matt: it hasn't been too terribly long. you rested at the campafter taking out queen ulara, so i'd say it's probably been about--with the travel to get to this point, probably about six hours since you rested. travis: plus, nobody is hurt.laura: well, he's hurt. travis: well, i'm not hurt. laura: can i perception checkaround the cave?

matt: go ahead and roll perception. sam: can i remind our partyof a couple things? pike, might be a good timeto try to heal vax's foot again. and also, while we have a moment, did we ever discernwhat is in that yellow vial? orion: oh this thing?sam: yeah, do we know what this is? orion: i'll do an arcana checkon the vial, which is not great. "i don't know, it looks icky." sam: let me take a look, as well.ooh, yes. 24.

matt: you take a look at the liquidand it looks enchanted, but the way its mixture is, the colors seem to swirl and shiftin a very caustic way. you can see from glancingat the glass vial it's contained in, the interior of the glasslooks slightly pock-marked, almost like the viscous fluid withinhas actually damaged the glass slightly. sam: it sounds bad. bad news. matt: you're unable to really ascertainwhat the nature of the liquid is, but those are the detailsyou can make out, currently.

ashley: i went over to vax's foot again. laura: oh no, come on! don't! sam: there's a little zombie poo on it. laura: i'm getting real tired of your shit. liam: ever since we were five. laura: i rolled 22 on perception, by the way. matt: all right. make a medicine check. orion: does this cave bottleneck? matt: it ends here.this is the end of the cave.

it curved aroundand ended in this little portion here. so you had a perception check?what did you roll? laura: 22.matt: 22. laura: yes, yes, yes!sam: oh, snap. marisha: secrets.travis: the second whisper. sam: get down into frame!lower into frame. pull them down. orion: pull them down. sam: ladies and gentlemen, we have a bunch of shirtsto sell tonight.

laura: (quietly) i think maybe...liam: you look weird. what's up? laura: we should not be hanging outin this room right now. can i try to get a better lookat what i saw? matt: you see, best you can,and you guys follow her eyeline. you look up, and you see what first looks likeit's part of the cavern ceiling. it has this weird texture.it looks almost like the smooth rock that the interior of the caverncomes off as. however, as you see it shift and move,

it looks almost like a portion of itis moving and slowly crawling, and it looks like there'sa red gleaming eye, and then two, and something drops down from the side, almost like a tailthat seems to dangle for a second. at which point, it detaches. (fwoosh) opens upalmost like a giant ray, with a screeching mouth that(screeches) screams at you. it lands down in the center of the room. ashley: i rolled a nine for medicine,just b-t-w.

liam: how's my foot doing these days? matt: your foot is still healing,but unfortunately, based on the medicine roll,it is getting better but not enough to complete the processof you getting all your toes back. ashley: i saw that thingout of the corner of my eye and was just distracted. orion: you guys want to run?sam: oh, what is that thing? laura: it's a big ray of death.i don't know. liam: it doeslook like a flying manta ray.

matt: let's roll some initiative, folks. laura: ugh!ashley: ugh, come on! sam: get out of this cave.liam: cheeky bastard. ashley: oh, really? really?i just rolled a natural 20. why couldn't i get that for medicine? matt: that's how it works. marisha: just throwing it out there:still the shark with the boat. laura: ugh, double 20s on the table. liam: natural 20.

marisha: if you guys want to run,the keys are in the car. the engine's warmed up, ready to go.i've got the key turned on. it's nice and cozy. that's such a good roll, though.that's a good initiative roll. matt: so at this, this thing leaps out from almost nowhere. the only reason you picked it upis your acute vision, and as it lands, it's right around the cornerfrom the two of you, and it has this long,almost spined tail and this jaw that opens up,this nasty, toothy gaping maw.

all right.initiative rolls of 25 to 20? taliesin: 22.matt: 22. travis: 21.liam: 25. matt: 25. all right.travis: and the shark. marisha: 20. ashley: 20.matt: nice. all right. matt: what were you? taliesin: 22.travis: plus ash's was natural 20. matt: and grog, what was yours again?

travis: 21.matt: all right. matt: 20 to 15? orion: 18.matt: 18 for tiberius. 15 to ten? sam: 11.matt: 11 for scanlan. laura: ten.matt: ten. ashley: sorry, scanlan. sam: it's all right.i'll see you next match. marisha: we're all over ten, though. that's pretty good, guys.we should be proud of that.

matt: all right, so top of the round.as this creature sits there, it's giving off this weird,horrible moaning sound (screeches) that's starting to just fill your ears. at the top of the round is vax. laura: what should we do? command us. liam: command us? laura: do you want us to stay? liam: run!

liam: we've never done it before! laura: we've never run!travis: let's see what happens! liam: what the hell is it called?my quick action to dash. laura: just leaving me?liam: yeah! laura: you're leaving me behind? liam: can i grab her by the scruff and run? matt: if you want to try and move her,you'll basically move both of you. you can do that,but you'll have no other action. liam: that's what i want to do.matt: okay.

liam: grabbing my sister. matt: grab your sister. orion: get on the damn carpet, you fools! laura: (groaning) can it fit us? matt: currently, you guys would be ableto get onto the carpet. laura: we jump onto the carpet! ashley: what if he flies?laura: he probably does. matt: what?! why would a giant winged-thing fly? ashley: laughs)he looks like he flies, guys.

sam: wait! can we have an aerial battle over water? let's do it! matt: percy.taliesin: i'm on the boat. matt: no, you're not on the boat. you guys have come into the cavernafter this point, when you gave chase. you guys are in the cavern. taliesin: i started headingback to the boat. matt: oh, you did?then yeah, you're still out by the boat. taliesin: so i just heardsomeone yell, "run." so i'm going to start unhooking the boat.i'm getting the boat ready to go.

matt: you take the butt of your gun and you start bashing against the icethat you set against the wall. it cracks, and eventually you get the rope freefrom the side of the wall. taliesin: and i'm bringing the boat aroundso that people can get on really quick. matt: okay. that brings us to grog. travis: i would like to rage... and run! travis: passing as many people as i can! matt: all right! travis: rage running! (frantic noises)

matt: okay. so you just bolt out.i say rage run and barbarian speed, you're going to getnearly completely out of the cavern. liam: his knees are really high in the air! matt: keyleth! are you stayingout in shark form at the boat? marisha: yeah, i guess. i feel percy unhook, and i start the forward momentum. pointing that direction? matt: okay! all right. pike.

ashley: oh wow, i'm up so soon!okay, i'm going to start running! matt: all right! so you turn and run.you catch up to grog, because he traveled twice the distancethat you could have with your tiny little gnome legsin your full-plate armor. you're like (grunt). plus, it's sand,so your feet are sinking with each step. it's rough for you to get aroundbecause of your size and the terrain. ashley: can i jump on his leg or back? matt: you can try to.

ashley: all right. matt: all right! make an athletics check. with disadvantage,because you're in full-plate armor. liam: nothing's free! (laughing)you've got to roll for everything. ashley: all right. we got a 19.and we got a nine. matt: all right. what's your strength?what was your athletics? total. ashley: my athletics is a one, total. matt: so that brings you to a ten.ten is what you needed. so, as you run up,you leap and grab onto grog's back.

grog, i want you to make a-- ashley: wait, no! hold on.i need to be honest. i rolled an eight. my athletics is a one,so doesn't that make me nine? matt: that makes you a nine. ashley: sorry. travis: look at that honor code! laura: that was good,because i was going to let it go. matt: so! as you jumpto grab onto the back of grog's back, you manage to find purchase.

grog instinctuallyreaches back with an elbow and hits you right in the sideof the armor, which knocks you flat on your back. you're currentlyprone in the sand right there. and grog just keeps running. you glance over your shoulderfor a second, but because you're raging, you don't see her.you just see shadows in the cavern. travis: (screaming in panic) matt: so you start moving your handin the air, freaking out.

holding your axe in one handand your greatsword in the other, just (panicked screaming). ashley: (laughing) oh my god,that's hilarious. travis: whack! boom! oh my god. ashley: that's all right. i'm tough! matt: the large, ray-like, cloaked creature swoops down towards the top of the-- ashley: oh, shoot.we've got to get out of here! travis: (laughing) sorry.

liam: it's a good thing we ran!laura: oh yeah. does it even matter? laura: no, it's just going to attack us.liam: we just gave up a turn. matt: all right. it's going to make a bite attack against tiberius and a tail attack against scanlan. so it's the twothat are immediately visible to it. so the bite attack against you, tiberius.that's going to be a 21. orion: yeah, that hits. matt: the bite attack against youis going to be a 23. matt: the tail (whapsh) whips aroundas you're on top of the carpet,

about to tryto get everyone out of there. you turn around and see this thinggo piercing by. it strikes across your chest. your armor takes most of the damage,but you can feel the bruise underneath. it doesn't actually pierce the skin, but you take seven points of damagefrom the impact of the tail. matt: tiberius!orion: yes? matt: all right, it comes outand sinks its teeth into your form, across your shoulder area,and it bites down. you end up taking--

orion: you're ruining my robe! (grunts) matt: (laughing) ten pointsof piercing damage. marisha: oh no.liam: (squishing noise) matt: and the creature wraps around you,(squelch) completely envelops you. sam: him, or me, or both?matt: him. matt: it completely surrounds youand wraps you like a blanket. all of a sudden, your vision goes dark.you feel yourself like (muffled yelling). you're unable to really move.you are blind and unable to breathe. the air is not able to get to youat this time.

travis: shit.liam: it is poppycock. matt: so! that's going to end its turn.tiberius, your turn. orion: well. (grunts) fire breath! matt: okay!laura: oh, that's good! orion: (roaring) get off of me! matt: because it's attached to your head,it's going to have disadvantage. so i think it's--is it a dexterity saving throw? its headis right by your mouth. i rolled a natural 20 and a six.

so because of the disadvantage,it does not make its save. orion: so, wisdom?liam: d6 times something, i think. matt: yeah. roll the damagefor your fire breath. orion: how many d6?liam: depends on your level. matt: depends on your level,as a dragonborn. orion: oh! hang on.matt: should be on your sheet. orion: is it... no...matt: no, no, it's... here, i'll... matt: no! it's partof the dragonborn ability. let me pull it up real fast.

orion: i don't want to roll wrong.i think it's 2d6. liam: that's for a low level. laura: you know nothing here.travis: your powers are worthless. sam: if only there was a way. taliesin: if there was some book that had all this information available. matt: it is 3d6 at 6th level. orion: oh! awesome. cool. taliesin: some ancient tomewhich suddenly answers everything.

orion: (panting in relief) 21! matt: 21 points of damage.you all hear a muffled (explosion sound) as bits of flame begin to shoot out from the corners of where it's wrappingaround the torso of tiberius, surrounding his head. the creature's tail flicks around in pain. you hear this muffled (screeching) soundas it keeps, still tight around his head, fighting through the damageand maintaining its hold on him. orion: if i do something,i'll probably have disadvantage.

right? correct?well, i'll just try it again. i'll spend... fuck. jeez. no! laura: don't spendall your sorcerer's points! orion: no, i fly aroundand (ping) hit one of my stones, and i'll spend... five sorcerer pointsto cast telekinesis and (blast sound) fling it off me. matt: okay! all right. we're going to doa contested roll on this.

liam: it's a contest.it's like an arm wrestle. it's like arm wrestling with dice. orion: oh, yeah! arcana? matt: well, no. for this, i believe it's the rollplus your spell modifier. should be five.so roll a d20, add five to it. orion: 20. matt: 20! all right. so, your ioun stone is floatingaround your head,

which is currentlysurrounded by the creature. it's clinging to your head; you can feel itgrinding into the top of your skull. you instill the ioun stone to trigger. as you do, the force beginsto pull it (grunt) off of, and flings it off of your head. the creature is detached and thrown backat that point of the wall, off of you. orion: (grunts) good! i use my movementto get the hell out of there! (grunts)

matt: all right. they move out that way. marisha: trinket, run! laura: it's not my turn yet!tell him to go! matt: scanlan, are you stayingon the carpet? anything else you want to do? sam: i am staying on the carpet.wait! is pike off the carpet? ashley: i'm laying in the dirt.matt: pike's laying in the dirt right now. sam: okay! i will jump off the carpet,grab her, and say, "pike. come with me if you want to live."

sam: and i just hold her really tight, and i sniff her hair,and it smells like strawberries. taliesin: got to make it weird, man.ashley: (laughs) sam: and then i dimension door usto the boat. marisha: aw! that's cute! matt: as scanlan grabs youand holds you for a second, for a moment you're confused, and you hear that strange shrieking moanin the distance, and suddenly the darkness gives wayto this flash of purple arcane energy,

and the two of you (boof)fall a few inches into hard wood, and you feel the boat rock for a second as you're now on the outside in the boat, being tugged by keyleth the shark. ashley: scanlan! thanks! sam: don't worry!that hard wood is the boat. travis: i have to applaud. matt: okay! vex! laura: trinket! run!

matt: (bear moan) trinket runs up.are you staying on the carpet? laura: i jump off the carpet,climb on trinket, and we take off! matt: all right. you jump on top of your bear,and you start bolting down the hallway. all right, that ends your turn.clarota just (whoosh) vanishes. kima (laughing) goes runningon her halfling legs towards the flying carpet. she takes her full turnand she just manages to get on top of the carpet,and that's her turn.

and she goes, "go, go, go, go!" orion: i am going! matt: (laughing) all right.so, for the time being, we'll say you guys manage to(whoosh) make your way outside of the cavern to the ship. sam: for now.taliesin: up, up, up. laura: can you go? oh, you're a shark. matt: being towed. laura: damn it!taliesin: we're fine.

laura: wonder how far this thing can fly. travis: well, we'll find out real quick. taliesin: we have lots of ways to hurt itbefore it gets there. we have arrows and guns.we're fine. matt: as you guys all get into the boat-- marisha: (laughing)follow the macy's day balloon shark. sam: (shushing)this is the craziest thing ever. matt: as keyleth begins to pull away,the boat picks up speed into the water, and you hear that moan soundbegin to get louder

as the creature (swoosh)out of the cavern, giving chase. taliesin: i take a shot. matt: all right, so!for the purposes of this-- taliesin: you've been waiting to use this!sam: this is a james bond water chase! matt: all right, so going off,same top of the round. vax, you're up first. liam: okay, so i throw a daggerat the mcray there. matt: due to its distance,the darkness behind it, and the fact that you are in a boat,

you are at a disadvantageon both your attack rolls. liam: plus i had a one on the first one. matt: so you super miss on that one. liam: no, it was a seven plus... 13 on the second. matt: okay, so you throw both daggers.(whoosh whoosh) unfortunately, it's hardto make the form of the creature. it seems to almost--i can't say change its color, but it embraces the shadows around it,and it gets harder and harder to see. and for a moment, you swear you see two more appear at its sides.

liam: oh. mirror images!sam: oh no. matt: you fling both daggers,and they vanish into the darkness and return to your side.that ends your turn. percy, you're up. taliesin: all right! i'm going to takea dead-eye sharpshooter shot. i'm going hardcore with this. so, with bad news,i'm sitting down. matt: so you've leanedyour giant sniper cannon

that you've constructedup against the side of the boat, aim it up, best you can,and take a shot. you are at disadvantagefor this shot. taliesin: i'm at advantagefor this shot! matt: so it cancels out.it's just a regular shot. taliesin: regular shot.liam: come on! taliesin: 13.liam: beautiful human. matt: 13?taliesin: yeah. matt: 13 unfortunately misses.taliesin: damn it!

matt: (gun blast sound) the ship actually rocksfrom the impact of the explosion. for a second there, you all feel like it's going to list and take on water. laura: are we all on the boat,or are some people still on the carpet? orion: no, a bunch of peopleare on the carpet. matt: who's on the carpet still?travis: we're in the boat. laura: we didn't all fit in the boat! that's why we didn'tall take the boat originally. orion: i'm still on the carpet!

matt: okay.tiberius is still on the carpet. laura: you're the only onestill on the carpet, then. travis: like i said. taliesin: by the way,if anyone wants to make us a little six-square carpet,that would be awesome! marisha: if someone crocheted usa little single-square magic carpet? orion: that'd be so fun. marisha: so we could put iton our little floaty deal. taliesin: and i reload.

matt: so you go ahead and reload.yeah, that'll be your turn. that comes up to grog! travis: how close is manta ray? matt: the creature is approximately... 40ish feet away, at an angle, so it's about 50 feet away from you,up in the air. laura: how long is that chain on the axe? travis: i was going to do something else. matt: you can try and shift your weightto the back of the boat

and get closer with your movement,if you want. travis: i don't thinkthe chain's long enough. 50 feet long? is the chain of returninglong enough to get to him? matt: you can certainly try. travis: (laughing) i'm going to hold off. i would like to hold off,and maybe he'll come closer, since i seem to bean intimate sort of fellow. matt: all right, cool.keyleth. you're pulling the boat? marisha: i'm going to use a run action,just double speed.

i feel action above,and i'm just shark instincts. matt: okay. so you manageto get some distance for the ship, pulling it further behind. marisha: yeah, i have a swim speed of 40. matt: you're moving slower than thatbecause you're pulling it, towing the entire boat behind you,so you're going 20, but you're putting distance between you and the creature, for the rest of the party, which makes it harder for it to catch up.

all right, that brings us to pike! ashley: okay! i'm going to send a guiding bolt to the flying manta ray. so, i have to rolland see if it hits? matt: yes. add your spell modifier to it.oh, you found your sheet? ashley: yeah, i did.matt: awesome. ashley: it doesn't hit. it's 12. matt: 12 does not hit, unfortunately. once again, you fireand you think you hit one of them,

but it seems to hit one of the group of three that's now flying overhead, and one shimmers and vanishes,seemingly unaffected by the bolt, but that one image of it disappears. ashley: can i do anything else?since i'm just sitting. matt: no, not unless you wantto move somewhere in the boat. ashley: no. dang it! matt: all right. it's now its turn.it is going to move. it gains up on the boatto about there.

it actually gets a little lower. it's starting to gain on you guys, make its way (shh) gliding downtowards the front, and you see nowthere's now two of them side by side that are coming down towards you guys. sam: are those real?laura: i don't know. matt: it's then thatthat strange moaning sound it's making (moans) begins to grow louder and louder, and all of you close your earsfor a second.

everybody, make a wisdom saving throw. marisha: including me? matt: you don't actually hearin the water. you're muffled. marisha: i'm in the water, yeah. matt: it's to the pointwhere it doesn't actually affect you. plus, you're in shark form. orion: oh crap, wisdom?matt: yes. orion: aw!sam: (laughs) matt: all right. scanlan?

sam: i rolled a two,but my wisdom is negative two. sam: so i'm at a zero.matt: all right. tiberius? orion: i rolled a four.matt: four. percy? taliesin: one. matt: one? oh no. grog?laura: oh no! our whole party! travis: 13. ashley: 12. laura: 11. liam: 14.

sam: oh boy!taliesin: we are killing it! matt: grog and vex.now let's see. you rolled a what? laura: i rolled an 11. matt: 11? okay, yeah, so, no.vax however, is okay. so, kima, vax, and grog, and clarotaall hear this horrible moaning sound and plug their ears and shake it off,not a problem. everyone else-- sam: instant peril. matt: this creature-- all of a sudden,its form becomes far more frightening than you ever saw before.it almost seems to swell with the cavern.

orion: is it casting a spell? matt: it's a natural ability.all of you are considered frightened. orion: oh my lord! sam: is it charming us? matt: nope. it is not a charm effect.it is a fear effect. you are scared of it, currently. laura: trinket is immune to being scared. it doesn't matter, because i'm scared. matt: you're scared.trinket's not affected, but you are.

essentially, until the endof its next turn, it's disadvantage on all attack rolls,and you cannot move closer to it. travis: can i take that turn now? matt: you can take that turn now, yeah.as it's moaning. travis: now, since i shook it off,i'm like, "that's lovely," and i would like to try,for the first time, intimidating presence. sam: is that a spell? travis: on a creature within 30 feet. matt: it would be within 30 feet.turn around.

ashley: get it! laura: get it grog, get it! travis: (yells) matt: all right, so what's the dc on that?travis: 13. matt: 13 for what kind of saving throw?travis: wisdom saving throw. matt: okay, for the creature.wisdom saving throw. it rolls a 12. matt: so after it does this moaning sound that sends the entire boatshaking with fear, everyone grasping the side of the boat,

looking at each other like,"we're going to die!" grog turns around, steps forward, pushing pike and scanlanto the side a little bit, and just glares at this creature, gives a giant bestial goliath shout(roars) out into the cavern that counteractsthe moan that it's doing. you can see the creature,teeth bared, its wings out, looking extremely frightening,looks visibly shaken. it begins to flap backwardsand actually get about 30 feet of distance

between you guysinstinctually with its movement. travis: that's right, bitch! he's frighteneduntil the end of the next turn. laura: does that cancel out our fear? matt: it doesn't cancel out yours. it just means it's further awayand can't get closer to grog. sam: but we're still scared of it. matt: you're still scared of ituntil the end of its next turn, but now it's keeping its distancefrom the boat.

it was starting to catch up to you guys,and now it's actually pulled back. not wanting to get near grog.all right. tiberius. orion: what's the creature made out of?what's his skin like when i look at him? matt: it looks leathery. it has almost the textureof a very, very thick bat or lizard skin. but it's very dark, from what you can see. you've had just little glimpses of ithere and there. most of it's been shrouded in shadow. it's almost like a thick leather cloakthat's come to life.

orion: well, i don't really-- hey! what do you think i should do, guys? travis: knock it into the water.let the shark have at it. sam: can you make us faster?can you haste her, or anything? orion: haste doesn't work that way now. laura: how high are the ceilings?can you pillars it down into the water? sam: just defer. orion: i'll defer for now. matt: okay, so tiberius,you move your movement to later.

liam: we can't sail away-- sam: can you shake us?can you shake our magic fear? matt: not unless you havean anti-fear spell. scanlan, you're up. sam: i'm going to attackat disadvantage, i guess, with... i'm going to create a big handright in front of him, to stall him with the bigby's hand. ashley: talk to the hand!matt: all right! travis: bigby's hand?orion: bigby hand? nice!

sam: it's this guy i know.his name's bigby, he has a big hand. matt: all right, so. you take your turn.are you just using the... which one? sam: i'm going to grappleand try to get it into the water matt: oh, grasping hand?ashley: ooh. matt: okay, all right. attempt to grapple. use the hand's strength scoreto resolve the grapple. sam: what do i do? what do i roll? matt: strength of 26, so roll d20 + 8. marisha: come on!

sam: i don't know what that is.is that a six or a nine? laura: there should be a dot on one side. sam: it's a nine! matt: okay, so nine plus eight. you're at 17. its contest was at 15.oh, but you are at disadvantage. so roll again. marisha: oh, come on...laura: don't be lower. sam: 14. yeah, i'm good. matt: okay, so as you rear back,your eyes squinting,

just scared to even do anythingwith this creature, you try out this new spell that you've only just recently managedto conjure to your attention. sam: (singing) talk to the hand! matt: as scanlan finishes singing, the rippling sonic energyfrom his singing shoots out from in front of himand forms this giant, slightly ethereal-looking arcane fist the size of the creature that reaches out, grabs onto it as he's moving his hand,

controlling it silently from a distance. it grapples the creature,holds it in place as its wings are also folded on itselfand you pull down. let's see here. grasping hand.all right, so you are trying to...? sam: well, i don't know. does it fall from gravity,or does it just it stay there, locked in? matt: it's locked inwhere you're holding it. sam: okay. then i'll just lock it there. matt: okay, so you lock it there. great.you can use a bonus action to crush it.

sam: oh yeah, i can crush it. yeah, i also give it a little squeeze.a little tickle. matt: so as you're holding it in place,you use your bonus action to squeeze it. it takes 2d6 + 5 bludgeoning damage. sam: 11 plus five. 16. matt: 16, nice. as it is currently held in place,screeching (screech, crunch) you hear this strange crushing sound of bones breaking on the insideof its strange form.

sam: this is the strongest i've ever been! matt: all right,and it is considered grappled, which is bad for a creature like that. that ends scanlan's turn. vex. laura: hunter's mark! matt: all right,you hunter's mark the creature. laura: and i'm going to attack him twice!because i'm original. travis: i have one thing i do. laura: 16.

matt: 16 does hit. laura: and 28. matt: all right.technically, because it's grappled-- liam: does it cancel out the disadvantage? matt: it does not, technically.it just means he can move it, so yeah, it does notcancel out the disadvantage. laura: oh, so i've got to rolla couple more times? matt: yeah. laura: they both hit. they're both high.

matt: okay, great. there you go. so, as you're on the boat,you can see the hand grasping. it gives you a moment of bravery. you pull out (swoosh, swoosh)let loose two more arrows into the slightly dark,shrouded exterior of the boat. both arrows strike true into the currently-grappledcloak-like creature. laura: 26 for those two.plus hunter's mark. oh, wait! no, 30 for those two.

and 9 for hunter's mark. matt: nice. portions of it are trying to squeeze free of this arcane hand. one strikes through its wing,leaving a gaping wound in the middle, where you can see it's going to have a hard timemaintaining height at this point. the second one strikes it and actually pierces one of its red, glowing eyes. it gives out this horrible, painful screeching sound (screech) into the cavern

as you can now see what was oncetwo gleaming red, piercing eyes, left with only one, and darknesson the other side of its face. travis: yes! yes!ashley: ooh! matt: that brings us to kima and clarota. kima, at this point in time is,unfortunately, at a disadvantage of finding out what to doat this distance, being a paladin. she is going to attempt-- travis: the middle finger.

matt: nothing.she's going to wait it out. orion: i see what happens. matt: so you're taking your turnafter laura? orion: yes. i'll follow suit. i'm going to... i'm going to straight-up cast thisbecause i have to. i cast telekinesisand i pull the eye out. (sucking noise) laura: ew.travis: kill bill-style, right? matt: interesting! okay.

so clarota, at this time, is also going to attempt a mind blaston the creature. it moves to the back of the boat and while it's currently grappled,he's going to attempt that. the saving throw does succeed,so it only takes half damage. okay. marking that. and then as you do telekinesis.roll a d20 plus five. orion: okay. and do i have advantagebecause of the grapple? matt: the grappledoes not give you advantage, no.

so you have disadvantageon the roll, technically, because you are scared of it. orion: and that's my what?matt: plus five. orion: 17. matt: 17? all right. so!as you focus your energy once again-- even just facing this creatureis a terrifying thing-- you see that one gleaming bit of redthat's piercing through the darkness. the secondary form around it dissipates. where there was once two gliding,one of them vanishes entirely

as that gleaming redis suddenly much brighter, yanked from its socket. it now gives outanother painful screech (screeches) as it is blinded,being crushed by a bigby hand, and you now have drifting amongst youat your control one of the eyes of this creature. laura: put it in a little vial.keep it for later. orion: i'm going to float it overand put it in one of my vials. matt: okay. write down in your inventory,"cloaker eye."

orion: i'm going to smell it,first of all. orion: no.laura: not good. taliesin: you know exactlywhere that's been. matt: this guy's not having a good day.vax, you're up. liam: all right. dagger, dagger,thunk, thunk. but at disadvantagebecause of the dark. i'm not afraid. matt: well, no. you resisted the fear.you have low light, so you're fine. liam: okay. first one is 26.matt: hits. liam: second one is 26.

matt: hits. because it is blinded,you do have advantage on it-- not advantage;you are able to sneak attack. liam: sneak attack. all right, okay. matt: it's currently held aloft,grappled by the hand. it has no visual sight, currently. sam: i've no ideawhat we're even fighting. liam: 23. matt: all right.how do you want to do this? marisha: (cheers)

liam: i saw where tiberiuspulled the eye out, and that's what i'm aiming at,its eye socket. so i flip it in the air,and when i catch it, i immediately let goand fill in the blank. matt: okay!sam: "socket" to me. matt: so as the creature is flailing aboutin torturous pain, suddenly the dagger (fwoosh, thunk) sinks into the empty socketin the front of its face. as it does, its body tenses upand reaches out

against the force of your arcane hand. you actually have to focusto keep it in place in its final death throes. all of its tensionand then it falls limp within your grasp. you now have this limp creatureat your disposal. sam: oh, i'm going to bring himto the boat. matt: as scanlan slowly drifts overthe limp body of this creature to the edge of the boat-- laura: what was it? can we loot him?

laura: does he have teeth and scalesand neat things? liam: it's a cloaker,because that was a cloaker's eye. taliesin: can we fashion it into a sail? sam: that's a good idea. matt: there is no wind in this tunnel. marisha: i can make one. sam, taliesin, and laura:we can make wind. ashley: we do have an air ashari.laura: we have a grog. travis: oh, we can make wind.taliesin: grog will make wind.

orion: i rolled a 16for a history check on the creature. matt: history's notgoing to do much for you. nature iswhat you're going to want to do. nature or arcana, those are the two. orion: so that's 14. oh, no. arcana?matt: roll for arcana. orion: yeah. 25. matt: yep. this creature is a cloaker.it's an aberration. it's one of those creaturesthat drifts over from the far realm, or at some point in timedrifted over from the far realm

and is an unnatural entity to this plane.they normally live subterranean. when not moving,they are nearly invisible and blend in, almost like a straight leather cloakleft and discarded to the side, hence the name "cloaker." taliesin: i've got a great idea. i want to sit,and i want to skin this thing. orion: well, yes. i want the teeth, also. taliesin: you can have the teeth.i'm going to skin it. matt: okay. so you guys are nowcurrently in this boat,

drifting along in the open areaover on that side. laura: should we make our wayto the little island? taliesin: or we could goto those strange buildings that are off in the northwest corner. laura: all the way up and over? marisha: oh, well, i was going to saywe could go into this cave here. sam: maybe move it this wayso the people can see. laura: oh yeah,it's right on the edge. taliesin: keep going. there you go.

marisha: well, what about this cave? laura: the only thing is, i'm afraid that if we keep using upall our spells, then we won't be able to take downthe big baddie if we come to him. marisha: we need a rest.laura and ashley: we need rest. marisha: i want to be ableto use my scrying spell before we try anything. laura: oh, okay.so should we make our way to this cave? marisha: sure.travis: good, we'll do that.

orion: how close are we?how long will that take? matt: if you guys start headingthat direction, you'll find out. taliesin: let's startheading that direction, and i want to skin this creature. matt: okay, as you guys are moving along,you leave a little space for percy. it's a little unwieldy in the ship. it's hard for you to do this,so it's not going to be the best job. taliesin: not going for craftsmanship. matt: fair enough. as you're pluckingwhat you think might be interesting

from this creature's body,as in the process of skinning it, you probably take a moment to realizethat a normal blade is going to have a hard timecutting through its hide, so you might have to borrow one. sam: i sing a little song to inspire him. i sing, "when you're trying to skin a cloaker, "here's some inspiration. "when we're on a creepy boat,here's some inspiration. "i want you to be near me--"(speaking) all right, that's it.

matt: right, so you gaina d10 inspiration dice. taliesin: i'm making a camo canopyfor the boat. matt: yeah, this is going to bea survival check on this. roll survival. orion: i rolled a natural 20to help him with any arcana enchantment if he succceeds. taliesin: 17. matt: 17? did youadd the inspiration dice to that? taliesin: i didn't. matt: you don't have toif you don't want to.

taliesin: i'm keeping it for later.matt: okay. sam: no, it only lasts ten minutes. taliesin: oh, does itonly last ten minutes? orion: a lot can happen in ten minutes. taliesin: oh, in that case, 26. matt: 26 would make a difference.in the confined space on this ship, as you guys crest aroundtowards the northern side of that island, you begin to move around.you can see to the right of you, there is this tunnelthat filters out the side of this cavern

that's just a continuation of the water,a river on the far end. you don't know where it goes.it disappears in the darkness, and you can hear in the distancethe light sound of rushing water. marisha: can i use my shark eyesto look down the tunnel? matt: it begins to curveabout 20 feet in, so you're unable to make muchpast that distance, and it looks like a continuationof the water flowing through, or into; you're not quite able to tellfrom this distance. taliesin: (singing)nobody knows what it's like--

taliesin and marisha: (singing)to be a shark man. matt, orion, and sam: (laugh) matt: percy. you manage to pull from itall the teeth in the process. taliesin: for you. matt: so that comes to roughly45 cloaker teeth. you don't know what that'll be worth,but you have that at your disposal. so you can write down,"45 cloaker teeth." you manage to skin most of it. you get most of the top of its hide usable. it's still wet.

it'll take a while to do that, let alone in an areawhere it's dry on the surface. but you manage to pullmost of the top of it off, so you have this wet, skinned portionof the back of the cloaker at your disposal. taliesin: i'm going to builda relative canopy specifically for the left sideof the boat so that we're protected and visibly obscuredfrom anybody in the city.

matt: okay. make a tinker check. taliesin: what's the bonus on that, again? matt: well, for that,it should be dex, i believe. taliesin: dex, thank you.(raspberry noise) matt: plus four,because you're proficient with it. so it's your dexplus your proficiency modifier. taliesin: that's 11. matt: 11? taliesin: i rolled really badly.

matt: yeah, you did.you still have the hide. in the time it takesfor you to get to the beach, you don't have much materialat your disposal, and to fashion anythingthat's on that side, the most you manage to getis a slight lift to it, and by the time you get to the beach,it just collapses on itself. taliesin: okay. once we're at the beachand we have all evening, i'll make another attempt. matt: okay, it'll take you some time.it's doable, but it'll take a while.

taliesin: i had a two.ashley: it's okay. travis: we made our way to the beach. matt: as you make your waytowards the beach, keyleth, you see in the distancein the water what looks like something slinking on the very bottomof this underground lake. probably a good 50, 60 feet down, you can barely make outwhat looks like a dark form, probably about 100 to 150 feet away,and it's only because of your shark form that you're able to make outany sort of semblance of it,

but it looks big, and it looks like it's slowly movingthrough the bottom of the lake. doesn't seem to be moving towards you. orion: it's just a thing.there's going to be things here. sam: what if it's just likeone of those party cruises where they-- travis: on the bottom of the-- taliesin: submersive party cruise. laura: how close are we to the cave?are we still really far away? matt: you guys are maybe 300 feetfrom the beach.

sam: but we don't see itbecause we're on deck, right? matt: the creature?no, only keyleth does. marisha: i drop them off at the beach. taliesin: let's dry-dock the boat. matt: okay, i'm going to ask keylethto make a stealth check in shark form. taliesin: a shark stealth. stealth shark. matt: the dex bonus of a shark form is zero, so just roll a d20. marisha: that's not true. it's +1. matt: giant shark? according to here...it says one. it's a zero. dex is 11.

marisha: oh, i was looking at mine.sam: shark argument! marisha: it's okay. 17. matt: 17, okay. as you deftly drag the boatat just the right distance to curve around this large subterranean form, it doesn't seem to take notice,and eventually drifts far enough away where you can no longer make any sort of visual connection with its form. you make your wayto the side of the beach. you drag up to the pointwhere the ship begins to hit the gravel.

you begin to move, curve to the side,and it (grinding sound) lifts up and comes to a restat the top of the gravel beach. you guys all step off the boat. okay, grog, you go aheadand haul the boat up. laura: i'm going to cast pass without a trace on all of us right now. matt: okay. marisha: i go ahead and un-shark myself. liam: and i'm going to lookfor bad things on the beach.

sam: yeah, what's the layout of the beach?is it just a beach? matt: okay, so looking at the beach here,it's an open beach. you can seethere are a few rock formations, small 15-foot-tall portionsof stalagmites or stone that either have been here for a long time or have been constructed or put thereto jut out of that part of the beach. but for the most part,it's just an open gravel beach that slowly comes to stopat the edge of the cavern, and there is a tunnelabout 15, 20 feet wide ahead of you.

sam: is there a half-submergedstatue of liberty, or anything? matt: perception check? sam: i got a 16 for my perception. matt: 16. you do not see any sortof half-submerged statue of liberty. my apologies. liam: how far away are wefrom the main island? is it like dumbo to manhattan distance? matt: yeah, i'd say it's probablyabout a good half a mile or so. travis: i would like to perceive

if lady kimahas been giving me any second looks after i intimidated old flappy wings. matt: make a perception check. travis: ten, plus... probably nothing.yeah, nothing. ten. matt: it's hard to tell. she seems very focused on the task at hand. her eyes have been, for the most part,up in the air around you. unfortunately, grog, you don't think she's paying much mind to youat the moment

because she's more concernedabout keeping the group alive and where you guys are currently headed. you'll have to try harderto get her attentions. it's okay, grog. laura: can we look around the entrance and see if anything dangerouslooks like it's around? i'm looking up on the ceiling. matt: yeah, now that you know the ideaof what to look for, for a cloaker, go ahead and make a perception check.

liam: 29. matt: okay. you guys glance around and, currently looking at the wallson the exterior of this beach area, nothing matches the descriptionof what you saw in the previous cavern. for the time being, it looks relatively safeon this part of the beach. laura: okay.liam: and there's caves? matt: there is a singular caveon the far end. there's a slight outcropping,and then it leads into

that one 20-foot-wide cavernthat goes deeper in there. liam: i'm going to creep upjust to the edge of the cave. i'm not going to go in. is it a separate perception checkfor the inside of the cave as well? matt: yes. liam: all right. matt: you want to make a stealth checkone more time? stealth check first. liam: stealth check is good.it's a 21. 31.

matt: 31, okay.so making your way up, you dodge from lowon the side of the beach, jumping in frontof these strange stone platforms, keeping in, look for cover. you make your way upagainst the side of a wall, begin to glance inside.make a perception check. liam: and that is 19. matt: 19. it's pitch-black in the cavern.you have no light source, unfortunately. you have darkvision,which does help you to a certain extent.

you cannot seethe entirety of the cavern, but you can see about,let's say, 40 to 60 feet in. the beach gravel comes to a halt and comes to this smooth stone flooring. you don't see anythingthat particularly catches your attention. liam: manufactured or made,or just paved floor? matt: it looks like it hassome natural change in the topography. it's not a polished floor, but it's definitely been worn over time. laura: can we maybe try to look in?orion: could be a tide cave.

travis: we have firewood bundles and stuff. marisha: i'm wet.that was a really cold lake. orion: prestidigitation!now you're all dry. liam: it's very hard to know, though.it's dark in there. laura: should we just light it up,see what's in there? taliesin: let's light it up.see what happens. laura: hey, tiberius? orion: yes? oh, light! laura: i shoot the arrow.

matt: okay. so as you cast lighton the arrow, it's blinding. you know at this pointto close that one eye as you release it in the distance. laura: oh wait, wrong eye. matt: there you go. that's the one. laura: right, right. matt: you fire the arrowinto the depth of this cavern. before the light spell wears off,it arcs inward and it hits the back walland ricochets off.

looking inside, it alllooks like a natural cavern interior. the light is the same glowing white lightthat you're used to. once it enters the deep part of the cave, the light almost gets a purplish huebefore it's snuffed out. laura: this doesn't seem very good. ashley: wait, the light getsa purplish hue? matt: the white light becomes purpleand then (ffft) is snuffed. orion: i want to do an arcana check. 18. check for any nasty magic. matt: at this distance,it's hard to make out any sort of source.

you don't sense anything directly,at your distance. you'd probably have to get deeperin the cave to make a true assessmentof the magical source. laura: oh, you didn't add tento your stealth. pass without a trace. matt: you havepass without a trace now, too? laura: well, i already-- yeah. liam: so my stealth was at a 41. matt: okay. good to know. (laughs) sam: what do we do? we've got to get-- someone's going in.

travis: want me to go in? sam: yeah, man! go in!others: no! liam: no, if anyone's going in, send me.i'm at a 41 stealth, and if we stay on the beach,we're in view of the main island. laura: we've got to try to hidea little bit. ashley: so the arrow's not still lit?it just went through? can you light, tiberius? laura: just get some light in there. can you put daylight in there? liam: tiberius, my dagger.do the dagger.

orion: well, sure, but it means that thing will be bright the whole time. liam: i would lose stealth. orion: yes, you would. marisha: pike, can you check-- ashley: i have darkvision. matt: yes, as do a lot of you guys. ashley: oh, we all do. laura: can you see if it's evil? sam: light a fire. let's just light a fireand throw it in there.

liam: non-magical.travis: we have torches. liam: yeah, throw a torch in. sam: yeah, let's just toss a torch. travis: i pull oneof the three torches we have and, "tiberius, will you?" orion: (fire breath noise) travis: i give it a nice long throw. matt: all right. tiberius's flame breath(fsssh) coalesces and begins to ignite the tip of the torchas grog lobs it in, end over end.

you see it hits the far endof the cavern, topples, and hits the ground. the fire itself, the bright red burning,as it comes to rest, takes on once againa strange purplish hue. liam: do the half-elves and the gnomessee anything when there's light going through? matt: you see nothing in particular. you catch what looksalmost like small whiffs of almost a mist or a fog,but it's like, (ffft) then vanish, (shh).

laura: i don't think we should go in there. matt: almost likethere's this perpetually materializing and dematerializing tuftsof small clouds of smoke. liam: forget this. forget this cave.keyleth, can you do that thing you do where you make the beachlook like an empty beach, or something other than it is? can we camp on the beachinstead of going in there? marisha: i can. orion: let's do that.i agree. i'm tired.

marisha: what if this is a clueor something important? sam: yeah, we've never shied away from a confrontation before. orion: pike, can you senseif there's any nasties down there? ashley: can i use dispel magic? matt: you can attempt to, yeah. ashley: okay, i'll attempt. matt: okay. so pike, as you step upto the mouth of the cave, looking where the torchlight is,you cast dispel magic. as you formulate your divine energy,

grasping onto your symbol of sarenraearound your neck, you can see this strange pulsing shimmerof divine energy that clears out the area. the purplish hue to the light vanishes and the light becomes a natural torchlight for a moment and all the wisps of smoke vanish... then slowly filter back into the space. travis: we don't need to go in there. sam: indeed. if only we had someonewho could go under the ground and be one with the earthand pop up in there and look around-- no?

laura: but she'll be popping upinto the wisps. sam: yeah, but she'll be fine! travis: wall it up! laura: i think just wall it up.can we see anything sparkling? can we look in and seeif there's anything that looks useful? travis: yeah, do i see any shapesand colors and sparkly things? ashley: should we check for traps? matt: it's hard to tell. you can't see the entire cavern from this distance, because the cavern opens upand then curves around.

there's a whole portionyou can't see without entering it. liam: here's what i think, all right? we don't need to whackevery problem over the head, and we have something far more importantthan whatever's in there. laura: right, lady kima? orion: right. i suggest we go and rest.i believe we can get some respite. matt: "i think we have a specific goalat this point in time, "and who knows what dangersor terrors roam these tunnels "aside from our specificdirectional choice at this moment."

liam: the only question is,do we want to try to rest here under some sort of illusion, or do we go to the island we can see? laura: no, because the island'sway over back here. taliesin: we rest here. we take shifts.we should be fine. liam: we could sail thereto the northwestern edge of the island. there's some sort of structure there. laura: i think we rest upbefore we do that. marisha: what if there's somethingin this cavern that could help us, though?

laura: can you wall it up? travis: between you and tiberius,with the columns and stuff? marisha: we could.how about this? travis: i don't need to rest,so i can just stand guard. marisha: how about i do what scanlan says? sam: oh. hello. taliesin: that always works. marisha: yes, i know. i think this isthe first time i've said this, ever. maybe i'll try what scanlan saysand i'll turn into a rock elemental

and just bamf in thereand see if there's anything good, and if it's bad, i'll just run outand make a rock wall. sam: oh. okay. laura: all right. we'll all be readyto attack on the outside. marisha: maybe? okay?travis: go for it. taliesin: yeah, let's go for it.this is a terrible plan. i think it's a great idea. marisha: let's do it. i like it.sam: yeah, let's send in one person. orion: as soon as i see her royalty go in--

matt: all right. you all gather yourselfon the exterior of the cave. you get into defensive positionsand prepare-- liam: can i ask one quick questionbefore we go? regardless of what happens, if there issomething shitty in here or not, are we camping here afterward? others: yes. liam: we're sure? okay.then i click my boots of haste. marisha: i'm going to go aheadand cast enhance ability on myself

before i do that,and give myself... extra wisdom. matt: all right, extra wisdom. marisha: i want to be a perceptive bastardwhile i'm in there. matt: so keyleth transforms herselfinto her earth elemental form. taliesin: rah. that's what rocks say. taliesin and marisha: rah. sam: i'm going to inspire herwith a little dolphin dance or something. whatever that is. i don't know,i'm just going to--

matt: it's hard to explain why, but his strange shimmyis slightly inspiring. you've learned somethingabout yourself today that you hope nobody elsewants to bring up in conversation. you get a d10 inspiration dice. orion: as soon as i see keyleth go off,i rub my ring and go invisible. matt: okay. so as you guysall mount into your defensive positions, keyleth, are you going straight through?are you going beneath, above? marisha: burrow beneath. i'll go, "(deep voice) bye-bye."

matt: this large earth elemental formtakes a few lumbering steps forward, and begins to sinkinto the sand and gravel below, just (shifting sound). marisha: "oh yeah, wait,have you guys seen this one?" marisha: as i go into the ground. matt: the most awkwardearth elemental exit ever. marisha: "i'll take the elevator." travis: i think it's the funniest thingi've ever seen. matt: grog's loud laughter bellows,echoing through the cavern.

you make your way underneath the ground, using your tremor sense to formulatewhere the top of this cavern would be, and you poke your head through the floor. looking into this, you can see now,there are portions of this cavern where it looks like elementsof the mithril veins that the subterranean kraghammer mineswere currently pulling from seem to now spread down into this cavern. there are small veinsthat trickle through the rock in this cavern of mithril.

you also look up and...make a perception check. marisha: with advantage, right?matt: this is wisdom, yep. marisha: that's a 13. that's a 19!i'll take that one. matt: all right, total of? marisha: 29. matt: 29. you take a momentand formulate your vision, the firelight still trickling through,although you have darkvision. you look about the room, and you can see there is a strange energy about the room.

there's something about this room that feels similarto when you encountered the frost plane during the first westruunwinter's veil encounter. there's a type of energythat seems to be brought into being whenever you've caught a mind flayershifting and bamfing out of any sort of combat you come into. there's something about this roomthat seems like it's crossing over or has a thin barrier with some other plane. liam: it's a gate.

matt: you don't see a particular doorway, but it feels likethere is a very thin veil here, and as you focus more on the vicinity, you can see what looks likelittle bits of energy that leak through. that mist you were seeingseems to be elements where the actual reality of this roomis warping temporarily, and shifting. ashley: it's like stargate. marisha: can i take a piece of rock and toss it up?

matt: you take it and you throw it up.it arcs across, hits the other side of the room,and clatters to the ground. as it clatters to the ground,you suddenly see, lightning-quick, five of these large, fast-moving,slithering weird creatures that were up against the walland now visible at this point strike at the rockand seem to start fighting each other for whatever that movement was. they're large, bluish and purple in colorwhen it shifts in its form,

with these sharp beaks and what looks like four tentaclesthat wrap out from the face. liam: that's familiar.sam: maybe they're friendly! matt: make a nature check, if you want.no, this would be arcana. arcana. this wouldn't be nature. marisha: arcana? all right. taliesin: you've got a number there. marisha: i've got a vague number. 11.matt: okay. marisha: wait! plus four. 15.

matt: arcana is intellect, though.it's not wisdom, is it? marisha: i used scanlan's die. matt: oh, you did? oh, i see. 15.unable to really make out more than you've heardof creatures like this. unlike most aberrations and creatures that seem to bleed overfrom different planes of existence, this one is not an aberrationin its form. this is just a subterranean monstrosity.it's known as a grick. marisha: a grick.

matt: essentially, it looks like that. all: ew! sam: show the people at home. travis: i automatically don't like it. matt: as they all take a momentand realize that whatever they were fighting overis not living and not moving, they hiss at each otherand slowly find other alcoves and what you can now see are small cavesthat are dug into the rock nearby. something draws them to this room,

as any natural space with this strange,fluctuating energy would do so. marisha: but they're not necessarilybleeding through from the other plane. they come from this plane. matt: it seems to be, yeah.they're not too weird. they're weird,but they're not too weird. marisha: big worms with tentacles,but not too weird. matt: you've seen it all. taliesin: they're not wearing sombrerosor anything. laura: so what are you doing, keyleth?are you staying in there?

travis: please say no. marisha: i'm just going to seep back down. liam: take the stairs, though. marisha: i take the stairs. matt: all right. after a few moments,keyleth reappears. marisha: but before i reappear, i go,"grog. i'm in a boat." travis: she's in the floor!and she's in a boat! it's magic. (giggles) liam: it is pretty funny. travis: will you teach me that sometime?

marisha: "no." matt: for a split-second,as you're doing that, you realizethat laughter's probably very audible. marisha: i'm not an elemental anymore. matt: so as you start laughing,you revert back from elemental form. marisha: i go, "tee-hee-hee, shh." ashley: make a wall! laura: wait, what did you see, keyleth? sam: wait, is she back?

matt: yeah, her elemental form is gone.she's now back into keyleth's form. liam: we're all just on the beach. orion: i'm not. sam: thanks, ti.liam: people were still laughing. ashley: i'm laughing just a little bit.i maybe peed a little. orion: pike is chuckling, at best.travis: i stop laughing. laura: what was it?was there anything in there? marisha: it seemed like it haddimension door properties, but i don't know if it was necessarilyat full dimension door strength.

laura: were there creatures? marisha: there were creatures. there appeared to be these thingsthat i've heard of, called gricks. they're like worms with beaks and tentacles. laura: oh, i've heard of gricks.they're really fast. marisha: yeah, they're super-fast.laura: yeah, they slither. laura: yeah, man. i studied the underdark.liam: all right. marisha: they did this wholehungry hungry hippos thing. sam: but you said it was a gateto another dimension?

marisha: it seemed to besome sort of dimensional gateway. i don't know which dimension. sam: i we come across any peoplethat we can beat information out of, we might want to ask themif this a known thing, a gateway back to the overworld. laura: i think it would probably goto the abyss or something. liam: or a shortcut into the--marisha: into the temple. laura: i wonder, do they attack things?they seemed really fast, right? marisha: the grick things? yeah.

laura: percy can you make a bomb? sam: oh, he did already. i've got it.i have a bomb. laura: can you throw the bomb in thereand they would all maybe attack it, and maybe it would blow them up? sam: maybe. it might hit some of them. do we want to go in there?because we can certainly do that. laura: just throw it from outsideand see what happens. marisha: if we take a few minutesand i take another breather-- because being a rock elementaltakes it out of you for a little bit--

and you guys can make some bombs,i can go back in there as an elemental. orion: actually, i thinkthat's a good idea. percy? the bomb that scanlan is holding,could you fix a thing around it to possibly hold magic properties? taliesin: i have not the slightest cluehow to do that. orion: you can use some of this--one of the glass, my potion-- what do you call those fucking things? travis: vials?orion: yes. sam: are we right outsidethe mouth of the cave right now?

laura: we are really close to it. sam: can we get awayfrom the mouth of the cave? travis: okay, who needs to rest?show of hands, who needs rest? marisha: i'm going to restwhile they talk. while they figure out a plan. liam: tibber-hoods,do you have any fireballs left in you? sam: t-money, what do you think? orion: i cast silence on vax. sam: i cast dispel magic.

orion: counterspell! sam: counter-counterspell! orion: do you have counterspell?you don't have counterspell. sam: no. matt: all right, both you guys go ahead--well no, roll your counterspell roll. orion: counterspell just fizzles his shit. matt: what level is your spell? sam: it's a level 3 spell? matt: so, no, your spell just (pfft).

sam: damn it. orion: and i don't silence him.did i have to roll anything to do that? matt: no.orion: oh, cool. matt: he has to make a save for silence. liam: am i silenced? matt: what's the save on that one?orion: 17. matt: right, but what's the actual save?is it wisdom, is it intelligence? liam: well, i rolled pitifully,so it probably doesn't matter. orion: i just know it's 120-foot range.should write the other stuff down.

laura: tiberius, was that really necessary? orion: "no, it wasn't.but yes, i do have fireballs left." and i dispel it immediately. liam: (yells incoherently) laura: shh! liam: i didn't know he was going to dispel it! orion: i'm unpredictable. ashley: because i have spiritual weapon, maybe i can try to createa crazy-ass bomb type of thing.

sam: we have a bomb. matt: you do knowthat the essence of spiritual weapon, it creates a weaponthat is partially in form with your deity'sweapon of choice or preference. it's mainly melee weapons.nothing too intricate. taliesin: we are not makinga holy hand grenade. laura: we already have a bomb. just throw it in, they attack it,we close them up. sam: i have a bomb.travis: we've got a bomb.

orion: with what vex is getting to, percy, is if you could fashion such a thing,or if i could, i'll enchant it. laura: throw a bomb, they attack it, then you can throw a fireballat the same time. we just have to get them in a cluster. orion: can i attempt to imbue the bombwith a fireball in it? matt: no, that is a delayed-blast fireball, which is a higher-level spell. orion: okay.

ashley: throw the bomb in. laura and liam: one-two punch.travis: scanlan, toss it. sam: i'm not a good thrower.is that what you call it, thrower? marisha: here, give it to meand i'll go in as an elemental. liam: no, we can just throw it.laura: just throw it! sam: then you'll have to hit itto light it. ashley: who has really good dexterity? orion: you have a bomb?sam: i have a bomb. orion: hold it out in your hand, please.

sam: i don't want to touch it.it's a saddlebag bomb. liam: i'm not trying to get it into a basket. laura: we just need to throw itinto the cave. orion: i cast telekinesis. i pick up the bomb,and i start guiding it into the cave. laura: is it so hardto just throw a freaking bomb into a cave? sam: it's already in! orion: pay attention, ranger. matt: so the bombthat was constructed ages ago by percy

that was originally intendedto put on a summoned pony. sam: yes. never got to use it. matt: but now is finally being used. tiberius, you approachthe edge of the cavern. make a stealth check. ashley: how do we light it? sam: he'll light it. a what check?laura: a stealth check. orion: i'm still invisible. matt: right, so youwould have advantage on that.

orion: oh. dope. laura: and you havepass without a trace. orion: yes. what's with that, so. matt: invisibility and telekinesisare both concentration spells. you would lose your invisibilityto cast telekinesis. orion: all right. well, i rolled 21. matt: a 21 total?on the first roll. orion: yes.i rolled a 13 the second time. matt: okay, got you.

so as you make your way upto the edge of the cavern, you come in partially,you guide the bomb towards the back, and you lob it towards the far end. this large, awkwardsaddlebag-style construct of percy's design,made of leather, metal bands, hits the back wall-- taliesin: i was very proud of that. orion: as soon as i let go,i cast invisibility on myself again. orion: i'm going to wait. what happens?

travis: yeah, you waitand see what happens. sam: let's find out. matt: okay. the bomb hits the wall,hits the ground, tumbles for a second, awkwardly slumps over on itself. at which point, in a blur of motion,the strange hissing sound, a bunch of momentum hits the room and you see all these creaturesbegin attacking it-- orion: as soon as i hear that noise,fireball. laura: what's the point of the bomb?why not just do that?

liam: it'll ignite the bomb.laura: you're right, it will, yeah. matt: so. the fireball impactsthe far end of the wall, where the clusterof these strange worm creatures are. it explodes with a large, blasting,echoing explosion sound. sam: i'm doing this. matt: hold your ears.roll damage on that. ashley: i take my shieldand put it in front of a couple people. taliesin: scanlan, is there any wayyou could absorb this sound? marisha: yeah, could we cast silence?

sam: nope. he can't. too late.he's casting like seven spells right now. matt: all right. how much damage is that? liam: once we finish this math,this explosion is going to be really cool. laura: and really loud. orion: 32. matt: 32 points of damage?orion: yeah. matt: that blasts open. percy, roll 4d6 points of damagefrom the actual bomb as the fireball detonates the saddlebagsimultaneously

with the explosion of the fireball. taliesin: 14 points of damage. 4d6. matt: okay, all right, great. so simultaneously you guys hear(explosion noises). you can feel the sand shift and moveand some part of the beach, some of the gravelmoves and rocks a little bit. taliesin: oh, god. matt: pitch-black smokecomes pouring out of the cavern. you have to guard yourself.

liam: that's going to attract some attention. matt: as the smoke slowly clears,you get a glance in there and you can see there are bitsand pieces and chunks of grick matter across the walland the inside of the cavern, with some gaping half-bodiesof these creatures torn open from the explosion. there is nothing livingand nothing moving from what you can seeat the center of this cavern. sam: let's go in!

matt: the occasional (dripping sounds)chunks dripping off the ceiling. travis: excellent.ashley: is the magic dispelled? for sure? laura: take a couple steps in,and perception. matt: perception check.liam: 15. sam: it was a good bomb.taliesin: it was a very good bomb. sam: thank you for crafting it for me.what do i owe you? taliesin: your life, at this point.and a song. you owe me a song. sam: maybe start on a new one. laura: 24.

matt: okay, glancing through?you can see the small tunnels that these creatures house themselves inas a defensive position. these creatures are not hunters,they're more scavengers, but they fight in packsand wait for things to find their way in. this tunnel was definitely a placewhere they do that to keep fed. however, this tunnel appearsto be empty other than the strange phenomenon of this energyin the tunnel. orion: i feel we should camp herefor the night. ashley: no more magic?orion: or day, whenever the heck.

laura: is there anythingthat can come through the portal? taliesin: it's more just an energy shield. sam: before we plan something,is there a portal or something? matt: make an arcana check.liam: something funky in here. orion: yes, of course, that's obvious. laura: what's all this purple stuff? liam: well, let's figure it out. sam: 16. matt: 16. as you take a moment

and step insideand feel the essence of it, there is no portal,there is no doorway, there is no tear. there's just a very thin veilbetween this plane and another. you're unable to really ascertainthe nature of this energy coming through, but you're able to seethere is these strange warps in reality. as you walk into this room,you look at your hands, and for a second your fingers seemto bend and go to form. as you look at people's faces,they twist and shift and then go back. sam: i don't think we should camp here.

matt: you don't knowif it's purely a visual thing or if matter itself is actually twisting, but it's very discombobulatingbeing in this room for any length of time. liam: clarota,what are we looking at in here? matt: clarota, as he entersbehind you guys, puts his hands together and goes, "this, i believe, is the veilwhere k'varn stepped into the cavern." orion: yes, exactly.that's what i was going to say earlier.

laura: okay, tiberius. orion: me, clarota, mm.that's what i do with clarota. matt: the tentacles writhearound clarota's maw. orion: that means he likes me. matt: "this is a boundary,a thin membrane "between this prime material planeand elements of the far realm." marisha: the far realm? orion: ooh, clarota. yes.do you think we could, after a rest of course,conjure a way

and possibly break the barrierand go to that side? matt: "you wish not to do that.your mind would break." orion: oh, that would be awful.i need it. sam: clarota, is this a possible thingthat we should maybe shut down? could k'varn send his allies through here? matt: "we have not the powerto shut this down. "it is how they overlap." laura: is it safe to be near it? matt: "i don't know."

laura: i got him, guys, i got him. matt: "we'll have to find out." orion: well, at least we knowthis beach is secure. we should go out in the frontand seal this up for the night. laura: you were rather loud. i'm afraid things might be drawnto this beach from that explosion. ashley: we could keep watch. travis: i don't need to rest.i'll stand guard. orion: this is inside and i was outside.they were hearing stuff inside.

taliesin: could this veilexist in sunlight? matt: "i do not know.i have not traveled the boundary myself." liam: i wonder what would happen if k'varn was cut offfrom the other side of this. taliesin: that's exactlywhat i was thinking. laura: maybe it would be goodto block it off. liam: or collapse it. taliesin: at least wall it offon our way out. sam: yeah, that's a good idea.laura: i like it.

travis: do that, you two. marisha: like, completely cave it in? travis: yeah, just block it off.taliesin: just wall it off. earth-meld it. marisha: i don't thinkthrowing up a stone wall is going to necessarily stop k'varn. laura: no, but can't you useyour rock-changing ability and squish all the rocks downand close the cave off? taliesin: i was just havingthis conversation. marisha: i can spend timeessentially collapsing the whole thing.

laura: yeah. travis: i start kicking sand and gravelinto the cave. orion: wait, how wideis the slimmest part of the cave? matt: it's about 20, 25 feet. laura: keep going, grog.you'll get there. liam: we can camp, but it's only been 6 or 7 hourssince we woke up, really. marisha: it's been longer. it was 6 or 7 hourswhen we were on that side of the thing.

taliesin: we did take about 8 hours or so. liam: 8 hours, all right. ashley: some of us can stay up.i can stay up, keep watch. travis: me, too. marisha: there's still thingsi want to do. liam: spill it, girl, spill it. marisha: clarota? matt: "yes?" his tentacles quiveras you call his name and he looks over at you with a curious,hungry-to-be-of-service expression

on his tentacled, mind flayer face. marisha: do you have anythingthat might assist me in a scrying spell to help spy on k'varn?maybe something in his image? matt: "i have not seen k'varnwith my mind or my eyes. "i've only heard of him arrivingafter i was cast out of my colony." taliesin: the description of her dream. ashley: wait, but i had a vision.i had a dream. laura: so you know what he looks like? marisha: do you know what he looks like?

ashley: well, what i saw was like a-- laura: are those cheez-itsyou're eating right there? ashley: it's what i do when i'm thinking.i had a little snack pouch. taliesin: crackers, all around.liam: it's lembas bread. ashley: i saw a single, twisted,unnatural black horn of-- matt: which kima mentions again. "that. that is what we're tryingto prevent making its way to the surface." orion: i see.laura: okay. matt: "that's the horn of orcus."

laura: maybe you can envision the horn? ashley: would that work? matt: "i don't know.i'm not a scrying type." orion: if you'll excuse me. i reach into my pouchand pull up the scroll of telescription. i enchant it to reach my brother jerahd. i write on it, "dear brother,it seems i am in a bit of a pickle "with a certain type of creaturethat can take control of others "with its mind and do nasty things.

"goes by the name of k'varn,and the only thing i know about him "is that he has a black horn.please help. love, tiberius." sam: i put a little cologne on the page. orion: he can't smell it, scanlan. sam: yeah, but it's always a nice gesture. orion: and i send it. matt: okay, so the scriberolls itself on top and poof, vanishes in front of you. orion: hopefully,he answers back promptly.

jerahd is a warlock and is a wizard of the mind, arcana,things i do not know of. he could possibly help us and has access to great knowledgein this matter. sam: phone a friend. ashley: good resource.laura: i like it. marisha: well, i guess while we waitfor him to respond, i'm going to start usingall of my stone shape and i'm going to startbringing down this tunnel.

taliesin: i'm going to work on the boat. marisha: just start collapsing it. travis: still kicking sand in. laura: while she's doing that,can i use my primeval awareness and see if there's anything undeador aberrations or things that are around usthat are seeming more active? matt: okay, you have a long distanceyou can pull on that one. you take a moment and concentrate.not in your immediate vicinity. you do sense that across the way,on that island,

there are hundreds of aberrations. travis: hundreds?taliesin: that's two zeros. matt: hundreds. you can't make out the details,you just sense the presence. you see clusters, you see somewandering the outskirts of the island, and the center of the island, you sense there is one very strong sourceof aberration-based essence. marisha: on the outskirts of the island? matt: no, in the center.

laura: in the center.travis: in the temple. laura: so. wait. i'm sensing... would that help youto know that k'varn is an aberration? marisha: i'd assume anything helps. laura: i'm sensinga really strong energy of an aberration in the middle of town. marisha: aberration in the center? laura: and that's somethingthat would've come out of this portal. right, clarota?

matt: clarota gives you a lookand says, "most likely, "or at least is related to the kinfrom the other side of the veil." marisha: wait, what? sam: "or at least is related to the kinfrom the other side of the veil." matt: "that." sam: i speak clarota. marisha: thank you. matt: "pay attention, druid." marisha: i was taking notes!

taliesin: he said, "pay attention, druid." sam: while this is going on,i go near lady kima and i start humming. i'm going to cast suggestion on her. sam: or try to. i'm just going to say, "(singing) gnome makes you want tocheck out grog's bod, "gnome makes you want tocheck out his bod and sweat him so hard." orion: is that b-52s?sam: yeah. travis: i go over to the waterand scoop some and pour it over my head. matt: as you're doing this, grog,

kima, who at this pointas you got out of this conversation is currently rewrappingthe handle of the maul that she found earlier in the cavern,stops what she's doing, glances over at scanlanwith a very stern look and goes, "gnome, i mean no disrespect when i say,toy with my mind again "and you'll findthe business end of this hammer "right up your rectum." all: oh! sam: and that's the parti need for shitting on beds,

so i apologize. i apologize.i'm sorry. matt: "you've bothered me enough recentlywith your antics." as she does that, she motionstowards your nether region. "i'd watch it." sam: i do call it my antic, but yes.you're right. i'm sorry, that was disrespectful.i apologize. i tried, man, come on.i'm your wingman. matt: she keeps wrappingthe handle of the maul. liam: scanlan, she didn't say ant-dick,she said antic.

sam: thank you, vax. travis: did it work?sam: i don't think so, grog. matt: as we're taking a restat this moment to prepare for whatever you guyswant to do next. let's take a quick restroom breakfor the group. taliesin: oh my god.laura: yeah, yes, please. matt: let's say about a 5-minute breakif we want to just play 3 videos or so. we'll make it quickso we can get back to the game. zac: hold up, before you go off--

matt: before we do that, all right,just a second. laura: there's things happening.matt: things are happening. zac: i have a present from the chat room. all: whoa! zac: it is a happy 10th episodecritical role cake. all: aww! matt: you guys are so awesome!laura: that's so sweet! zac: also, in honor of the twins. matt: all right,so they came in from this side.

sam: wow.laura: aw, you guys! sam: we get one of thoseevery two episodes! sam: wow, that's great! matt: guys, that's great.thank you so much! taliesin: this aberration is a cake! zac: so while you guys are on break,you'll get yourselves some cake. but before we cut to the videos, i just want to remind everyonewatching from the front page that we are 140 shirts awayfrom getting to a thousand shirts sold,

and at a thousand, we will do a live q&aafter the show tonight. matt: yep. zac: so we have an hourto sell 140 shirts. sam: or sweatshirts. zac: or sweatshirts.there's hoodies on there. women's cut tees. laura: i still haven't ordered mine.i need to get my hoodie. zac: male tees. matt: presents for your friends?

travis: presents for your friends! orion: yeah, that's cool.travis: that's a good gift. zac: all you've got to dois scroll down on the channel or join the chat room, or you'll see every once in a whilethe ads show up on the front page. orion: i'm going to really enjoy it. zac: so get a t-shirt.we're pretty close. i think we're only 40 subs awayor something, lucas? taliesin: whoa.

zac: from a tabletop promo giveaway, and we'll have all these guyssign a poster and include that with shipping. if you're wondering whyyou should sub this channel, it helps keep shows like this, and we have a lotof other programming like a live comic book show,cosplay show. we have live music every friday night.it's a good time. so you should sub. and i guess let's cut to the break.

travis: i've got to pee! matt: 5-minute break guys, make it quick. we'll see you back here in 5 minutes.thank you. ashley: pike grew up in the outskirts of town, in his early years, armed with his two handed great axe, and his disobedience cost him dearly.(weapon crack) where you pay for... lady favors. based on first impressions.(thunder crack) he set her on the path to truly discovering herself.

not knowing when, or if, she will ever return. with this knowledge, one thought plays in repeat in her mind: taliesin: percy was the third of seven children, one day, a mysterious couple named lord and lady briarwood came to court. eventually jumping into a freezing riverand floating unconscious to freedom. a talented musician, master of disguise, and dashingly handsome in his own mind, educational experiences with the opposite sex--

matt: welcome back. break is finished. once again, i want to remind you guys,we're just a little over 100 shirts left. if we can manage to get to 1000in the next 45 minutes-- sam: it's going to be tight. laura: it's going to be tight. travis: gifts. gifts for your friendsand family. your pets. matt: shop for your buddies' birthdays-- liam: your friends are goingto be watching the show in under a month. sam: you know what?

just buy them and then return themafter the show's over. sam: it's fine.orion: just do that. sam: we'll take it.matt: don't do that. laura: don't do that. matt: yeah, no worries, guys. so to bring this back to where we were, you guys have been puttering aroundafter you're clearing out this cavern on the northern shoreof this large cave surrounding yug'voril. what is your current plan of action?

travis: while they've been sleeping,i took my axe-- sam: wait, did we sleep? matt: you guys didn't end up resting,i think. travis: oh, no?matt: just been preparing. travis: i thought we rested. laura: no, we haven't rested. marisha: i've been collapsing that cavern. matt: you manage to make a way where the central focal pointof this cavern's entrance,

you manage to eventually carveall the stone to close it off. marisha: okay. tiberius!orion: yes? marisha: has your brothergotten back to you yet? orion: he should'vegot the message immediately. i'm pretty surehe's researching it before he answers. matt: about 20 minutes of you doing this,as you're having this discussion, a small slip of parchmentapparates in front of you with a flash of purplish energy. written upon it, it says,"tiberius, you speak of the far realm,

"which i am quite familiar with;there are many aberrations. "however, i do not knowthe name k'varn per se. "in my research,there are many things "that can fallunder the description you say. "it's vague enough. "unfortunately,i have not much to go off of. "if you had an imageor a visual description of this creature "i'd be able to help, "but at the moment i have no wayof giving you any more knowledge.

"my apologies,"and signed at the bottom. sam: may i see this?(sniffs) hmm, draconiar noir. orion: you are astute.i say all that stuff out loud. travis: i start digging a ditchwith my axe in the sand. laura: what are you digging there, grog? taliesin: i'm going to workon the camouflage. travis: don't worry about it. matt: go ahead and makeanother tinker check. sam: are we in the cavern?no, we're on the beach, right?

matt: you guys are on the beach.sam: oh, thank god. laura: can we hear any kind of movementcoming from the other island? does it seem likethey heard those explosions? are we safe here? matt: the island itself i'd sayis about a quarter- to a half-mile away. it's hard to tell from this distancewith no light source, any movement whatsoever over there,or any sound they make over there. liam: oh, so it's really dark? matt: yes, other thanthe bioluminescent fungal plant life

and forest that coats this side. you have no light source on that side whatsoever. liam: all right.laura: okay. matt: and it's just faint enough where you can make outthe outline of the island itself, but beyond thatyou have very little visual. sam: let's sleep. marisha: is there any type of stoneor rock or debris with the residual energyfrom the purple mists of the far realm?

matt: it doesn't necessarily cling. it's more of a presence thingthan it is a material clinging energy. marisha: okay. liam: also, i'm sorry, if it's this dark in here,we lit up the cave. anyone on that islandwould have seen that. i don't think it's very safe here. sam: where do you want to go? laura: he's doing a camouflage-y thing,

and she can make it looklike nothing's on the-- liam: i know that,but no one camouflaged the explosion of firethat lit up the cave. sam: then let's get out of here. why don't we go to the islandand see if we can make camp? taliesin: let's headto those little buildings off the corner there. marisha: not yet.laura: hide? orion: i do not think that is wise.

sam: what? what's wrong? marisha: i'm going to sit downnear where the far plane portal is. matt: which you already closed offat this point in time. marisha: i want to be near it, though. matt: so you're near the edge of the wallwhere you've already blocked it off? marisha: right. matt: okay. so you get closerto that presence. marisha: yeah, so i can be close to it. and clarota? pike?do any of you want to help me in this?

sam: what are you doing? marisha: i'm going to do my scrying spell.sam: oh, okay. ashley: i can assistbecause i have that, as well. matt: you do have scrying as a spell. i would say if you both expend--if you have it prepared. do you have scrying prepared? ashley: no. matt: all right, well,we'll see what we can do. marisha: can i say thatbecause i prepared it, i can be like,

"here's my book. you can borrow it.i wrote it down. i know you know it." matt: well, see, for druids,it's not so much a spellbook more than it is just an innate nature. you have a book for your own note-taking,but the actual spell itself comes from you harnessingthe divine energy of nature around you. so there wouldn't be a way that it should be able to help youin that spell, more than a slight bonus to the dc, but i'll keep that in mind.

marisha: scanlan, can you give mesome meditation music? sam: would that help at all? matt: yeah.definitely would give inspiration. orion: your highness,hold on a second, wait a minute! marisha: what? orion: i think we're doing thisa bit prematurely. marisha: why?sam: she can do it again tomorrow. orion: if she fails,he will know where we are. laura: yeah.sam: true.

marisha: he knows we're here already! he possessed the queen and said,"welcome, you're my treasured guests." remember that?he knows exactly where we are! sam: that's a good impression. ashley: that's a really good point.taliesin: it is actually very good. orion: it was becausehe had eyes to look through. marisha: he seems to be pretty powerfuland all-knowing. i'm pretty surehe probably knows we're fucking here. taliesin: i think thisis a reasonable risk.

laura: he's probablyjust playing with us right now, waiting for us to get there. marisha: he said,"you are our treasured guests." i wrote it down. liam: he knows we're coming. marisha: he knows we're coming.he wants us to come. travis: to inspire keylethwith her scrying spell, i hop in the ditch i've been digging and start going,"look, i can do it too! (laughs)"

and i start paddling in the ditch. marisha: oh! good job, grog! you did it! travis: is that inspiration? matt: you feel inspired. marisha: besides,we're talking about moving anyway, right? so i might as well do it hereif we're going to relocate. plus, i want to benear the energy of the far realm. maybe it'll help a little bit? matt: it's possible.

marisha: it's what i'm hoping for.taliesin: let's go for it. sam: all right!so i'll sing to inspire her. "scry, scry, miss keyleth, scry, "put your eyeballs to the k'varnand tell us why." all right, no, that's it. taliesin: singing, "this will be the daythat i scry." all: "this will be the day that i scry!" matt: all right, then. marisha: so wait,do i get two inspiration dice?

matt: no. you can only haveone inspiration dice at any given point in time,and it's a d10. marisha: okay, but i'm happybecause of grog, right? matt: you are!sam: yes. you get happiness. matt: so you're smilingthrough the spell. (laughs) all right, so,you take ten minutes to yourself to prepare the ritual. you carve out a portion of the beach where the gravelis most easy to manipulate,

and you begin to set upthis extensive scrying ritual. marisha: and i want to meditatespecifically on the horn, and i want to use pikeand see if i can channel her vision, focusing on the horn,since that's what we really know. it's pretty much the only thingwe know what it looks like. matt: okay.so, as you draw the circle across the portionof the gravel and stonework-- actually, this is further in the cave, so the gravel has given into more solid stonework.

you begin to carve across the ground with a small piece of charcoalthat you use for your ritual drawings, this giant, runic circle. you draw points for you to sit and a point for pike to sit as well,to help you focus in this vision. once you've taken the ten minutes to establishall the various material components and littered it with piecesof dried animal matter, some herbs, and lit a small bowl of incenseon the side to help you in this spell,

you sit down, take your place.pike, you take your place. and you begin to concentrate. you draw the essenceof the nature energies around you and begin to project your vision towards the descriptionof this dark horn, pushing what you can best ascertainis the direction of the temple from where this ritualis being conducted. all right, so. given the circumstances... bonus from that, let's make a will save.

all right. so. you feel your vision project beyond you. it's a sort of out-of-body experienceas the energy that makes up keyleth is no longer given physical form,it's just adrift in the darkness. you feel yourself drawn,pulled almost, like there's an energy that draws youas if poison from a wound. it pulls you upward, and you're looking down over the topof this entire cavern, suddenly. the darkness tends to fade for a moment,

and you can make outthe general outline of this island. once again, your vision(shhh) zooms in and shifts. you can look over the city.you can see yug'voril over top. you can seethe glowing aspects of the forest surrounding the outskirts of it. and you can see in the centerof this ruined city that has been reconstructedin the image of the temple that stands. this giant pseudo-pyramidwith a flattened top. you can now see itfrom the overhead view of this temple.

it is actually open, and that strange glowing sourceof green energy you can seeis slowly emanating from the top. your vision is pulled forward again. you feel yourself drawn towards it, and as you come towards the top,you can see: the open portion of this temple's roofis a crossbeam made of gold or brass, and there is some sort of structurehanging from it that falls deeper into the temple.

you then move past this into what is the topmost chamberof this temple. it's darker at first,and as your essence tends to coalesce and find some sort of visual here,you can see now, this brass cross-beam that is held aloftin the center of this temple chamber drips down into a spiral of metal, this strange, arcane contraption that does not match any of the constructof this temple previously. it almost seems like it's beena new addition

or is taking the place of something elsethat was a central focus of this chamber. you follow this strange arcane structure.about 15 to 20 feet it comes from the top of the temple chamberto the center, where held aloft underneath itby another 15-foot drop, you see in this dark room a pool of a dull, bluish purple liquid. and it's pulsing with life,and with energy. you now look down, your eyes focus, and in this pool, this ten, 15-foot-wide round pool,

you can see this pulse,almost a heartbeat of purplish energy, what look like small purple stones. but they're not stones, they're minds.they're brains. they're essences. and they're all working together,interconnected. you're looking upon the elder brainof yug'voril, the center of the entire illithid colony that residesin the center of this chamber. you can see now this green energythat's being brought down from this metallic structureat the top of this temple

is being funneled down over,and is acting as an arcane prison for, the elder brain. it's sealing and controlling, essentially,and what you had gathered from your previous discussionswith clarota, this is what has taken the mindsof the mind flayers and bent them to k'varn's will. your focus shifts nowfrom the elder brain, and you look around the room,and in the dark shadows of this room, you can see there are cages.there are metal bars.

you're unable to really ascertainwhat the material is, but in each one of these small cagesyou see some creature. some of this realm, some not. horrible forms: mutated, torn,some missing limbs, some in the process of slowly dying because they're unableto keep a physical form intact. it's a collection, a horrible collection of malformed entitiesthat are being experimented on. pulled apart, put together.

this also serves as, seemingly,a laboratory for k'varn. and you feela presence in the room, suddenly. your essence shifts aroundand you look in the darkness and you see,slowly drifting out of the shadow, a single gnarled black horn. underneath that horn, you can see nowthe physical form that it adorns: dark brown leathery skinwith slightly pointed edges, almost like scales that formout of portions of this flesh. you see below this horn one large,piercing, sky-blue eye

that glances up and meets your gaze. as it does, from beneath that eye, you see a toothy mawtear into a wide grin. and around the outskirtsof the singular eye, numerous other eyes(whoosh whoosh) shift around. coming into the light,you see now a fleshy ball that is drifting in the air itselfunder its own physical form. this aberration, this horrible entityis now floating forward. you can see metal plates that are graftedto the physical body of this creature.

marisha: oh, come on! matt: apparently k'varnhas experimented on itself. these eyes are attachedto strange finger-like stalks that twist out of its body. these eyes, darting around the room,looking at different directions, and then they all (whoosh)singularly shift on you at once. as it does, you can feel,all of a sudden, your presence, which has been driftingthrough the scrying spell, locked in place.

and for a second,you feel like you can't breathe. as k'varn presses towards you, this fleshy sphere of eyestalks and teeth, this small chuckle billows updeep within its mouth. "(chuckles) so, guest. "do you like my home? "you're welcome any time." at which point, the horn seems to glowwith this creepy greenish energy, and you feel this piercing painblast into your head.

you try and scream, but you can't.there's no breath. go ahead and make a wisdom saving throw. laura: oh no!sam: oh, shit. oh god. marisha: do i stillhave my enhance ability up? matt: no,because that's a concentration spell. liam: what does keyleth look liketo us right now? matt: keyleth is sweating profusely,and you can see she's flinching. liam: i'm walking up to keylethand i'm grabbing her by the shirt and i'm going to slap heracross the face.

matt: all right. so? marisha: 27. matt: 27. all right. good. you take 11 points of psychic damageand are thrust out of the scry spell. your vision is pulledout of the top of the temple and suddenly you're back in your form as a sharp painhits you across the side of the head. marisha: ow! matt: vax is holding you.

marisha: christ! what-- why?! liam: you were in pain.are you all right? are you all right? marisha: "you were in pain, "so i thought i'd fuckingslap you across the face?" gee! laura: keyleth! language.travis: are we hitting each other now? marisha: sorry. wow. orion and laura: what did you see? orion: so she tells us, right?

marisha: k'varn's a beholder. laura: (gasps)sam: a beholder? what's that? orion: it is reallynot a thing we want to fight. it is awful. it is wretched.it will kill all of us if we don't find out a wayto kill it-- oh my god. marisha: not only is k'varn a beholder,k'varn has been experimenting on himself and so he has armor grafted onto him, and the horn the horn which-- i don't know.

laura: you said there is somethingcaging the elder brain right? marisha: yes. that big green light. can, we can see it?is it like the luxor in vegas? can we see the green light? matt: it's not a beam,but you do see a slight green glow at the top of the templein the distance. you saw it when you first entered, and it's been this dull beaconas you traveled around this island. laura: so there's something connectedto the top of the temple

that's caging the elder brain? marisha: it's like an arcane prisonaround all of the elder brain. laura: is it possible to maybe collapse the top of the templefrom far away, and release the elder brainfrom its cage and then clarota,your brethren could fight the beholder instead of us? (laughs) marisha: clarota, do you knowhow we could possibly break this prison? travis: could you tell mewhat a beholder is first?

because i don't know. sam: big bad scary thing. travis: with finger eyes? orion: dm, i write a detailed-- sam: just hold on. wait. patience. matt: that's a beholder. laura: oh, the thingon the front of the monster manual. ashley: it's on the cover of a book. travis: worst possible scenarioimaginable.

laura: that's all you could have said.liam: the iconic creature. taliesin: it's on the coverof dungeons & dragons monthly right now. it is the cover model. liam: there's dragon, then beholder.marisha: oh, man. laura: i mean, we've killed a dragon. travis: yeah he's got lots of teeth.let's brush 'em. marisha: each eye tends to have a beamthat has a different ability. sam: yes.laura: oh. liam: it's a magic fun bag.

marisha: it's a magic fun bag.it's probably got everything from silence and dispel magic to petrify to a disintegration ray. taliesin: you're thinkingabout this wrong, though. you're thinking about thisin the wrong direction. beholder is not--that's not the goal. laura: the horn is the goal. taliesin: even more than that,it's the hundreds of allies we could have. laura: exactly! we free the elder brain,they attack it.

taliesin: prison is the target. travis: not the beholder? taliesin: not the beholder.if we can free the elder brain-- laura: we don't have to fight it ourselves. taliesin: then we're not alone. now, what was creating this green light?where was it emanating from? marisha: it seemed to be emanatingfrom the top opening of this pyramid that was the main templeof the center of town. taliesin: can you describethe top of the pyramid?

matt: i'll give youa detailed description. essentially,this pyramid comes to a top and then flattens up at the very top. where you would expect thereto be a flat surface is instead, essentially,a windowed opening. you don't think it's purely openlike you could just jump through. there is some sort of glassthat coats it, but there is a brass cross-beamat the very top, and then part of this cross-beam

holds aloft this strange seriesof metallic wires that spiral and intertwinethat serves as a conical focus piece. you can't see the interior of it. laura: so if we take out the beams-- marisha: it was almost like a beehive. matt: essentially a slow beehive. marisha: it was focusing the energy. taliesin: we havesomething very important. we have a vial of yellow liquid.

sam: what does it do? laura: it might age you. marisha: we don't know.laura: it might do something. taliesin: it seems to be very acidic. sam: so it could burn the metal?ashley: burn the beams? taliesin: i could melt the metal and we could actuallybring that entire structure crashing down. laura: but does anybodyhave an aging spell? something that causes thingsto disintegrate things?

maybe we could rust the metal as well? taliesin: we have that yellow goop,and that would definitely help. liam: we know that it's acid? taliesin: we suspect it. laura: it might be a form changer, because the king swallowed a vialand it made him strong. marisha: actually, i can learn heat metal and i can heat the beamand make it (clicks her tongue) beam. laura: he's got vials of acidin his bag of holding.

ashley: excellent. taliesin: we're going to break the temple. laura: let's break the temple. clarota? matt: at this point,as you guys look over at clarota, you see clarota,for the first time in a while, looks visually disturbed. has withdrawn from the group and is leaning against the sideof the beach cavern wall and the tentaclesthat normally slowly twirl

are all tensedand pulled up into a knot. laura: clarota, you're going to cramp your face if you do that. taliesin: if you have something to say,we would appreciate it. liam: if you keep making that face,it'll freeze that way. matt: "that k'varn is "of this new creature, a beholder, "and carries this hornthat lady kima has spoken of. "it's a great danger.also, keep in mind "the temple is not madeof average stolen metals.

"this is the center of the elder brain.we reinforce it with magical protection. "it's the centerof our entire species' knowledge. "every brain in there is our elders'.as we pass to the next generation, "our mind is brought and introducedto the elder brain. "we have that room protectedfrom simple acids. "we must make sure we are ready." liam: clarota, keyleth has scriedthe top of the building right now. it didn't look like it was partof the original structure. is she mistaken? is the top somethingthat was built by your people?

matt: "no. it was open before. "there seems to be some sortof new focus k'varn has constructed." liam: would that be as strongas the rest of the building? matt: "i do not know. "but if i've seen anythingof the nature of this insidious creature, "i would say, plan for the worst. "nothing is more terrifying "than underestimating a beholder." laura: right. can beholders fly?marisha: yeah.

laura: they can. okay. travis: among other things,it seems like. laura: what can't they do?liam: not much. taliesin: they're terrible monsters. laura: so they're reallyvery fleshy and weak, but he put armor on himself. travis: he's super strong.laura: so now he's extra strong. liam: like a wizard times 50. marisha: i'm assuming-- oh, go ahead.

matt: then kima says, "the key is here is not to thinkhow to fight him head-on. "we have to be smart about this. "while he has the home turf,we have the element of surprise. "we choose the groundsin which we attack, "and we choose the methodsin which we set the battlefield." marisha: underwater fight! sam: we could tryto just draw him out somehow. matt: "i highly doubthe's going to leave his home turf.

"but if we can find a wayto perhaps turn it against him "or use it to our advantage. "maybe some reconnaissance.i don't know." laura: reconnaissance! matt: "i don't know!" travis: it is glass on the top,so we could try to sunlight the head? ashley: i have somethingcalled divine intervention. laura: what is that? ashley: you can call on your deity,

and you roll a percentile die, and you can have them help youwith something. laura: so is it possible to try to get her helpbefore we do this? or is it somethingthat you have to do on the spot? ashley: i don't know, because this is new. matt: that's up to you.you can attempt it once a day, and once it works,it can't be done for another week. laura: so if we attempt it,then she can intervene?

she can be on our side? matt: in some way. essentially, you formulatehow you want your deity's aid. and if you succeed--you have a 10% chance of success-- in some divine way, sarenrae will guide power or aid to you. sam: why don't you wait on that. liam: well, we either have a 10% chance right now for herto tell us what to do--

liam: or a 10% chance--sam: to help us later. laura: once we knowwhat we're doing. ashley: yeah, let's waituntil we know what we're doing. orion: i believe we should goand rescue the prisoners and build a small army. moreover, i've been thinking. it all goes downward, correct?he's all up in a pit, yes? sam: the world down here? orion: no, the beholder, k'varn.

liam: he's in the top of a pyramid. orion: up or down?liam and travis: up. orion: well, that won'thelp me at all. marisha: it's his laboratory. laura: i feel like we should gofor the top. travis: how would we free the prisoners,first of all? taliesin: i think it'sthat beehive structure. laura: we have to take outthe metal thingy. liam: it's not letting them out.

we have to get themout of k'varn's control. so how do we do that? taliesin: i think we destroythe beehive structure at the top. laura: i think we destroy the structure. liam: it's the only optionthat seems open to us, unless we keep stumbling aroundand looking for some other way, i think. laura: we don't haveany kind of corruption spell that ages things? marisha: well, we've got the acid thing,and maybe grog can--

laura: what if we hit itwith dispel magic, maybe get your goddess's aid-- hit it with dispel magic,hit it with corruption, rust the shit, and then it falls! sam: but we don't have corruption. liam: can scanlan mercilessly mockthe top of the thing? sam: oh, i can mock.travis: eff you, brass cross! marisha: i like percy's idea.we've got that acidic vial. taliesin: we have severalvials of acid, actually.

ashley: can you take the normal acidand could we make it magical? laura: like, extra bad?we don't even know what it does yet. marisha: well, i can always be an eagle,and i can maybe fly, or maybe grog could carry a big boulder. that way, after the acid has-- taliesin: i thought aboutmaking an acid arrow. i really did. marisha: he could throw a big boulderto collapse it the rest of the way. liam: question. you built a bomb before.sam: that took months. liam: if we could hole up for--months or weeks, was it?

laura and sam: months.travis: yeah, it took months. taliesin: it took me monthsto figure out how to build. liam: now that you know how to build one,would it be quicker? marisha: wait,the bomb we just threw in that room? taliesin: i could makean exploding arrow. i've made one, i can make another. matt: i would say your materialsare very limited. taliesin: yeah. at this point, though,if i had a workshop, i could-- sam: well, let's take kima's advice

and maybe startwith a little reconnaissance. we'll get closer,we'll rest for the night, and maybe send in a snooping party. liam: my sister saysthat island is crawling with nasty shits. laura: we can't get closer. ashley: we should just rest.we'll stay up, because we're good. laura: what if we fly in over the topwith the carpet in stealth, put the camouflage on the carpetso they don't see it. fly in over the top.stealth in, spy, get an idea of--

liam: inspect the top of the building, see where the acidwould be put to good use. laura: yeah, see what kind of magicis being held on top of it. liam: we're guessing that k'varn doesn't want to leavehis little cubby-hole. taliesin: i would assume not. liam: so even if we fly down on top,he gets pissed, he could fly up, but we could fly away. he probably doesn't want to leavethe top of the--

taliesin: there's going to come a point where chaosis just going to descend on us. travis: we're also forgetting that the second that he sees usor we get close enough, he could control all of our minds. sam: wasn't the point of us goingto these beaches to try to see if therewas any other advantage we could find? laura: we were trying to find clues so that maybe scryingwould be helpful, which it was.

marisha: yeah.sam: all right. laura: okay, here's another option:dimension door. what if you go and hug one of the beamsand dimension door the beam out? sam: i don't think i can do that.orion: no. sam: i can banish a being,but not a beam. laura: you can't cast a portalon the door and make it fall? taliesin: no, sadly.laura: not like portal? liam: well, we've been here,and we've been here. sam: should we go to one more beachbefore we all die?

liam: here, or here,or this little nubbin right here? taliesin: i was thinking about that. laura: those are justmore things to fight. liam: well, that's true,but my sister studied the island, and she sensedthe presence of things everywhere. travis: that sounds awesome.let's go there. matt: clustered mainlyin the city region. marisha: there's no need for us to relocate now. liam: well i am curious about this.

can we see this from the beach we're on?what is this? matt: at this distance, it's hard to make outany sort of visual. taliesin: we could camp there. that could be wherewe stage our attack from. travis: yeah, i like that.let's go take over a little shanty-town. marisha: wait. why? sam: because it'll bethat much closer tomorrow. we can do reconnaissance from there.

marisha: we can do reconnaissancefrom where we are. sam: we still have to get acrossthis body of water. you saidthere's something swimming down there. marisha: we've got a magic carpet. travis: it'll be a little victory.we'll take over the shanty-town. marisha: it's literallynever been a problem. ashley: can we all fiton the magic carpet? laura and travis: no.matt: not at once, no. ashley: i can water-walk.

liam: we can alsodo two trips on the carpet. marisha: but we're not all goingfor reconnaissance, are we? laura: no, stealthy stealth. taliesin: if something goes wrong,though, it's going to be-- i would rather something go wrongwith all of us than something go wrongwith half of us. liam: well, i tell you what.we don't know what to do, so why don't vex and i and scanlan go for a little rideand check out the tip of this island?

ashley: i don't want to be split up.travis: i don't, either. travis: let's take over the shanty-town.let's at least get on the island. sam and taliesin: baby steps. travis: yeah, baby steps. marisha: okay, well, then you guysgo check it out first. taliesin: we'll get in the boatand we'll start heading there. ashley: are we getting on the boator doing the carpet? taliesin: well, we can'tall fit on the carpet. liam: let's let tiberiusand the twins and scanlan

fly ahead of the boat,quietly, carefully, see what we see. we have the earringsthat tibber-hoods crafted for us, so we can tell you what we see. taliesin: perfect. liam: and we don't want to rush in. we're probably going to go here,but let's not rush in. let the quiet ones go have a look. laura: just to make sureit's not crawling with baddies. marisha: okay.so we'll start boating over.

liam: you need to take it easyfor a moment. you just went through some shit, keyleth. ashley: you guys are going on the carpet?laura: yeah. marisha: yeah,i'm going to take the boat. travis: i've got a big axe.i'll paddle the boat towards the island. marisha: awesome. travis: i've been practicingin the sand to impress keyleth. working on the elevator. i haven't figured it out yet,because i don't know what that is.

liam: you know that thing a dog doeswhen it pulls its butt along the floor? laura: but i could castpass without a trace so everybody gets +10to their stealth rolls. liam: yeah, that sounds good. travis: so who's in the boat with me? sam: oh, we're going over?by boat? is that what's happening? travis: percy, keyleth.laura: trinket. travis: pike and trinket.so we start paddling in the boat. laura: how about kima and clarota?clarota should go with us.

matt: clarota can just hover. laura: can clarota be on the carpet, then? matt: you can have himalongside the carpet. travis: yeah, we'll take kima.liam: yes. laura: yeah, clarota come with us.travis: (singing) love boat. matt: so percy,you're on the boat as well? taliesin: yeah, i'm in the boat. sam: are the rest of us flying?we're flying. liam: team clarenceand team kima-gibbler.

travis: watch your mouth. laura: clarota, i'm surewe've asked this before and i wasn't herebecause i missed a part of a thing? what about your hat? what does it do?can you make more of them? liam: he said no, it would take a while.sam: we did this already. matt: "i could, but the time requiredwould be months, weeks. "not in our timeframe, i believe." travis: that's squid for no. laura: all right.

liam: all right, let's do it. quiet ones, let's get on the carpet.tiberius? laura: try to stealth it.are we camouflaging the carpet? taliesin: i'm going to attempt to attach the skinto the bottom of the carpet. matt: to the bottom of the carpet? liam: we're saving the world,here, people. let's not twiddle our thumbsfor too long. travis: but you're on the boat.

taliesin: well,before you guys take off. just going to tryand sew it on the corners. matt: okay, go ahead and make a roll. taliesin: that's better. 16. matt: 16. easy enough to do. all right, so you take a little bitof your thick, heavy leather thread, the stuff that you use for something, and you loosely attach itto the bottom of the carpet. liam: sorry,i did a quick scrying spell

and i know that we're 50 shirtsaway from the total, so keep going. get your mother a shirt. keep going. sam: okay, so we're over the water? travis: yeah, we're already paddling.the boat's going too. we're fucking fast. matt: so, as grog's pulling along--make an athletics check, by the way. travis: oh yeah, about to smash you. laura: and we're stealthing? ahead? matt: you guys are--laura: being sneaky. travis: it's a 22.

matt: all right, so. you pull it across. it's a slow speed,but you're making your way. i would also like grogto make a stealth check. laura: i rolled a natural 20 on stealth. travis: where's my stealth? taliesin: you've gotpass without a trace also. travis: 19. so 29. matt: 29 stealth. as you're very carefullybreaking the water's surface-- okay, so as you guysmake your way across the channel

towards the far end of the island,which is the beach that's in view, you see the water disturbed slightlyabout 200 feet off to the right. something deep below.you can see bubbles rising up. as you carefully make your way,ever so quiet, across to the beach, you find purchase. landfall hits youon the other side of the beach, apparently not disturbingwhatever lies beneath the surface. travis: i immediately hop out,pull the boat up just to beach the boat. matt: okay, so you pull the boat up.

the rest of you guysbring the carpet over. you come to a landing part,totally fine. the beach comes to a steep inclinethat leads up onto the island proper. there's cliffson both sides of this beach, and as the incline increases up about maybe 500, 600 feetfrom where you are, you can see what looks likea few buildings or rubble of what wasa small gathering of structures. laura: can we check outthe thing in the air?

liam: is there a larger onebehind those smaller structures? laura: that was it. matt: what you're seeing now is this. travis: are there anyof those crazy trees you mentioned before? matt: you do see, towards the rightof those structures, those fungal-based trees. they rise about 25, 30 feet in the air.there's no leaves. it's almost like a clusterof weird fungus-like vines that drift from the top surface,

and the trees unnaturally sway in place, almost like they have a rhythmto their movement. travis: dr. seuss trees. not cool. matt: really nasty dr. seuss trees. laura: clarota,will those trees attack us? are they living and attack-y? matt: clarota says, "no, those treesmerely exist on this island. "they feed off of the essence of it "and they provide foodfor other things that live here."

travis: like what?marisha: trees are bad? matt: "wandering spores."laura: wandering spores?! matt: "other creatures."travis: other creatures? matt: "we feed our captives,our slaves of the colony, "with the fungal essenceof the tree." travis: other creatures? don't skimp on the details,it's only our lives. matt: "the trees are not dangerous,but whatever resides on this island "is probably under the influenceof the elder brain.

"and my people, which are in turnunder the influence of k'varn." liam: but as you're from this island, what wildlifecan we expect to run into here? matt: "small, sightless rats.cavern insects. "but the dangers lie in the sporesthat wander the forests." laura: i'm picturinga big yellow thing with little legs. sam: pus.liam: fuzzball. laura: is that what it is? matt: "you'll know when you see it."

laura: well, that's lovely.thank you for your help. matt: "spiny."laura: spiny. matt: "drifting." travis: i take the cask of aleout of the bag of holding and pour him a little glass of ale,and i'm like-- laura: oh, you know what, grog,i hate to tell you this-- travis: it sounds a little scratchy.would you care for some ale? liam: it's really good. matt: it's a psychic discussion.

he looks at youand gives you a stern look. takes the ale from you. travis: why? matt: "i have no needfor such false sustenance." liam: clarota, that was rude. travis: i will not forget that. liam: very rude. all right. sam: can we go inspectthose structures up there? liam: yes, everyone wait here.

i grab scanlan by the scruff of the neckand nod at my sister. sam: i turn invisible. liam: let's go take a peek, yes?we'll take a peek. just wait a minute. taliesin: we can wait. that's fine. marisha: i actually go collecta few of the vines hanging from the trees. matt: all right.go ahead and make a nature check. taliesin: general perception checkon the beach as well. taliesin: i don't know why i'm bothering.11. it's a beach. travis: i rolled 15.

marisha: 16. matt: 16 on nature? okay, from a safe distance,you look at it. the trees do not appear to be anythingbeyond a subterranean forest. fungal trees. marisha: i wanted to collect some. matt: oh, you wanted to go overand collect some? okay. it's quite a ways up.it's up the side of the cliff. it's up an incline,and the forest starts

adjacent to the structurewhere they're going. taliesin: might want to wait. matt: so you can make a stealth checkto make your way there, if you'd like. marisha: no, i'll wait.i thought we were next to a tree. matt: no, most of the foreststarts further up this incline as the island itselfbegins to level off. taliesin: let the scouts scout. sam: let's go scout it out. sam: so we make our wayup to the structure.

liam: 28 for stealth. matt: 28 for stealth.you get advantage on your roll. laura: is it our old stealth check? can i use my flying stealth check?damn it. sam: nope. matt: what did you roll?sam: three. matt: with advantage? sam: that was my advantage.the first one was a one. laura: 31.travis: holy shit.

matt: all right. so.liam: do the twins outweigh him? sam: wait, plus two! that makes it five. laura: plus ten. pass without a trace. sam: oh, plus ten! that's 15! travis: we're getting better!plus my inspiration from paddling. matt: you guys make your waytowards this ruin, and as you come to it, you caught a small glimmer of iton the bridge that was constructed across the first beach you came acrossin this cavern. the stonework is interesting.

it's almost like an influxof jade and marble. the stone itself does not seem to be anythingyou've seen naturally around the cavern; either it was brought hereor was crafted from some substancethat resides on this island. but it has this weird green jade,marble, almost... vein-like visual to it. and you notice all the structuresaren't straight and smooth. everything has this slightlynon-euclidean bend to it.

every edge has a slight curve. it's off-putting. there isn't a rigidityto any of these walls, and the buildings themselvesalmost seem to sag, or they sit or rest at a strange,unnatural angle. laura: these buildings are sad. matt: many have been long-crumbled, and you find some of these buildingshave fallen in on themselves. you do notice,as you approach the edge of it,

there is a large, circular structure. a pit that is built central to this. parts of the wall have fallen in, but for the most partstill remains intact, and in the center of this pit,on the floor, you can see what lookslike splotches of dried crimson, long-left blood splattersof some sort of creature. you see dried bones,but the bones, while dried, have some sort of fungusgrowing on them.

you also see what looks to be,tucked against one of the walls, a campsite.but a very large campsite. the fire pit is 15 feet wideand is just a small cinder. you see what looks to bea pile of furs. sam: a recent campsite? matt: there is actual embersin the fire pit. there looks to bea large bedroll made of patchwork furs, but the pile itself is huge. liam: but it looks twice the sizeof what i would use for a fire,

or what i would use for a bedroll. matt: three times, even, which means it housesa lot of individuals. sam: or one big thing. marisha: or a really big thing. liam: giants.marisha: yeah. travis: (laughs) matt: as you're taking this look, too,as you guys are having this visual, you-- liam: question: bigger than grog?

matt: well.you immediately hear a sound. it's a slight rumble in the groundand what sounds like a footfall, and as you glance over your shoulder,you can see what looks to be some sort of towering humanoiddragging something behind it. sam: (singing)there are giants in the sky. matt: it glances upwith its nose in the air (sniffs). "who goes there?" and you look to seewhat looks large, almost goliath-like: bald, skin is smooth, no hair,but its skin is purplish in color.

where a normal giantwould stand naturally, it's horribly hunched, like its back hasa horrible scoliosis twist to it. one giant popping yellow eyeglances out towards the edgeof where you guys are. it doesn't seemto have found any of you immediately, but something has alerted its attention; it seems to have caughtsome sort of trail in its natural homestead.

you see it standing probablyclose to 15, 20 feet in height as it begins lumbering up (krsh krsh krsh) towards you. liam: stealthed. laura: oh, should we hide?can we try to hide? matt: all of youwere stealthed as well. laura: oh, yeah. can i do insightand see if it seems like a bad guy? matt: you can make an insight check. laura: i know. i'm just checkingto see if he's a misunderstood guy.

travis: do i see him?can i do a simple recognize check? matt: you don't see him.all you guys are staying back at the beachwhile they're checking. orion: both of you have got earrings. laura: that's 17. matt: 17? this entitylooks like it's hungry, it looks malicious, and looks like it's caughtthe thrill of the hunt, since it seems to have seen somethingnear its homestead moving.

as it begins to step forward,it drops whatever it's holding behind it. liam: i'm picking up scanlanand moving backwards. laura: yeah, can we move into the shadows? sam: i'm invisible. liam: you're right there.laura: we know where you are. liam: i was holding your handthe whole time. sam: okay. matt: and that is wherewe're going to leave tonight's session. (all groan)

travis: come on!liam: nowhere near k'varn. marisha and travis: really?liam: nowhere near him. orion: no.matt: yeah. travis: but wait,maybe if we sell out the shirts we can go another half-houror something. marisha: yeah, how many shirtsdo we have left? orion: like 20 or something like that? sam: didn't make it. didn't make it to k'varn,didn't make it to the shirts.

liam: it's k'varn! zac: we have to readall the donation messages. if we meet our goal for the shirtsby the time we're done reading-- laura: 20 shirts! zac: then are you guys coolwith doing the q&a? all: yeah! zac: all right, so.liam: if you sell those 20 shirts. travis: there's 20 shirts left?laura: that's it. liam: come on, guys. 20 shirts.

laura: me and pike bought hoodies.zac: go fuck it up. ashley: i bought a hoodie.laura: i bought a hoodie. zac: all right, i'm just going to tryto open this up here. laura: we could all be hoodie twinkies. orion: we have twinkies? taliesin: there's no twinkies.there's just cake. sam: that was the stoner-est thingyou've ever said. liam: i'll buy a hoodieif you guys buy 19. deal? here we go. matt: what are you doing, man?

zac: i'm trying to load itinto google docs so we can actually see the messages. laura: he's taking his time. matt: oh, that's much easier.in theory. taliesin: i have not the slightest cluewhere my phone would be. laura: oh no, really? taliesin: it's probablyout in the hallway. laura: whoa! we're 14 shirts away! taliesin: you guys are doing it.marisha: 14!

zac: looks likethey start right here. matt: all right.guys, let's get some of these read off. orion: oh, yay.taliesin: yay! matt: so. kurt cole donated $100 to 826. matt: "#grogcrush." thank you, kurt. marisha: grog crush! matt: browncoat2511 also donated $100. "thanks for inspiring our friendsto finally play d&d with us. "i'm donatingas a gift for my wife, lauren."

matt: hi, lauren!marisha: aww. so sweet! matt: "for her 30th birthday.she's an avid reader, "our d&d group's bard,and a big fan of the show." sam: bard!all: aww! marisha: happy birthday!taliesin: happy birthday. orion: that man loves you.marisha: that's so sweet. matt: all right.zandorinvictus donated $75 to 826. "#lessthanthree you guys.excited that a week from today "i get to play my first gamein like 7 years.

"hope to do as well as you guys."that's awesome! zandor, have fun. marisha: yay, zandor!travis: that's rad. matt: zofer donated $25. "many thanks for all the time and effortyou put into making critical role." well, thank you guys for watching it. laura: yes, very much.matt: we're glad you guys like it. marisha: thanks, zofer!orion: thank you! matt: tfdiggs donated 20 bucks."so nice. had to pick up the shirt twice." aww. good man.

"always look forwardto having all the loins girded "and all the violence encouraged.thank you for being awesome." sam: yeah! that's us. we should do "loins encouraged"and "violence girded," no? matt: sure. ashley: hey, guys!sam: what?! laura and liam: we did it! matt: that's so awesome! sam: liam, did you just buy 20 shirts?liam: yeah.

matt: you guys are ridiculous. liam: wow.laura: that's so awesome. taliesin: holy cow. laura: oh my gosh.you guys are awesome. ashley: you guys! what the heck.matt: thank you guys so much. liam: thank you guys. a thousand yearsof dungeons & dragons. matt: it's the best audience ever.you guys are amazing. speaking of which,i've got to put the cloak on.

all: put the cloak on! orion: it does get warm in here,just a little bit. sam: yeah why stop at 1,000?let's go for 2,000. zac: even if we didn't make it,i feel like we had to do the q&a because there'stwo $1,000 donations in here. laura and matt: what?!sam and marisha: confirmed?! matt: all right. hold on. zac: all right, we're working our way up.we're here. matt: okay. burgtorp, 50 bucks. awesome.

"i've been wanting to play my druid dwarfafter watching your show, "but no dm or other playerwill likely satisfy me "after all you guys' and gals'in-game acting. speaking of druids,is keyleth half-elf or elf? "the overlay shows elven.love from sweden." you're half-elf.we've got to fix that. marisha: we still need to fix that.yeah i'm half-elven. matt: we just need to fix thatin the opening. taliesin: on your mother's sideor your father's side?

marisha and laura: hell elf.taliesin: hell elf. matt: gil ramirez! 10 bucks. "hey guys, so gladto have met you at ren faire." oh, hey! what's up, gil? matt: met him a few weeks back. "let me knowif you guys want those brooches made." taliesin: oh my god, yeah.those was awesome. orion: that's right.marisha: we'll totally take brooches. matt: kavemtg. "first time watching live

after obsessively consuming the videosfor 2 weeks. fuck time difference." yeah. matt: "i had to go for the holy trinity:tee, sub, and donation." that's awesome. "much deserved.thanks for everything, guys. k. "p.s: matt, we need dm tipscolumn/video series." laura: ooh.taliesin: that's a really good idea. matt: not a bad idea. we talked about doing it for the channelgoing forward, so keep an eye on that. this is really warm.i'm putting the hood down. electricidolon. 20 bucks.

"back again this week.got a shirt this time, too. "thank you for giving mesomething amazing "to look forward to every week, guys. "need a critical role animated series.for serious." i agree. that'd be cool. taliesin: who would voice our charactersis my question. zac: you call your peopleand we'll call our people. matt: exactly. electricidolon. orion: nice!

liam: can i interject for a second and thank earl davis, @wheelyfactoids,for buying 8 shirts? orion: holy what?! laura: that's so cool.liam: thanks, dude. matt: that's awesome!you have christmas on lock! liam: give them out to seven people. start playing dungeons & dragons with them. zac: i know that we havesomeone in the chat room-- i'm not sure off the top of my head--

someone boughtthe entire office shirts. laura: seriously? zac: yeah, they sent a messageand asked for everyone's shirt sizes. laura: that's so cool! matt: why are you guys so awesome? oh my god. okay, norsarah.four bucks. awesome. orion: oh, cool! matt: "i would like to rage!or donate, in this case. "i love your show.it's my most favorite thing in the world.

"i'm joining my own d&d groupbecause of it." "thanks for sharingyour adventures with us. heart. "and remember, keyleth:fish are friends, not food." marisha: fish are friends, not food! matt: g1bigdaddyheft. 25 bucks."tv shows can't come close "to the epic powerof critical role thursdays. "as always, thank you allfor coming together "and sharing your adventure with us "and inspiring so many peopleto begin our own."

thank you, guys. that's amazing. taliesin: hey.marisha: aww. matt: argh. mahidal,who i've met on the minecraft servers. awesome. donated five bucks."oh man, the critical role crew, "you remember that timewe all went to ancient rome "and they had pizza and lasers? "and then we found outthe doctor was there "and someone had messedwith the timeline? "that was a good day, and we all escaped!"

matt: amantarayx. 20 bucks. "watching critical role is the best wayto spend my 21st birthday. "less than three, all of you."happy birthday! all: happy birthday! marisha: we fought a manta ray.matt: you did. travis: oh, was that a birthday huzzah?travis and ashley: birthday huzzah! matt: all right,theinfragable donated 50 bucks. "long time watcher,first time subber and donator. "this show is awesome.you guys are awesome.

"literacy and imagination is awesome, "and i'll keep doing song parodiesfor all the characters. "here's $5 per episode." you've been doing all the song parodies?those are awesome! taliesin: yeah, they're so awesome! sam: those are great!love the song parodies! matt: keep them coming.those are awesome. orion: oh, dude!yeah, those are hilarious. zac: so wait, there are song parodies?can we get those?

matt: we had the link sent to us.he did song parodies for grog and scanlan. zac: send us the linkso we'll play them next time. travis: it's amazing. i may or may not... have sung that at home. liam: on a side "night"-- sam: on a "side night!" liam: on a side night,we'll play another game... on a side note, we love fan art.we love it. we're going to try to find a wayto showcase it on the show, perhaps.

marisha: if you go to our website,it filters through, but as long as you hashtagcritical role-- laura: we'll be able to see it.marisha: we'll be able to find it. liam: we'll see it,and we're looking for a way to add it. laura: all of us are kind of obsessedabout checking out the hashtag. taliesin: it's a problem.marisha: yeah. matt: we go home after each game and we're up till 3am going like,"(gasp) favorite, favorite, favorite..." it's bad. it's a problem.

all right, we have killer88d,donating ten bucks. that's awesome, thank you so much. joe curr, 20 bucks. "i now look forward to thursdaysmore than i do fridays." taliesin and liam: so do we! matt: "it's a great showand it introduced me to d&d. "i'm enthralled.much love, much hugs. #teamtrinket." thank you so much! misskemede, 20 bucks.

"you're all such talented voice actorsand are fantastically entertaining. "thanks for providing me "with such an incredibleintroduction to d&d. less than 3." thanks, you're awesome. axisofanarchy. hello, what's up! marisha: axis!orion: hey! matt: "so i thought i would startmy birthday celebration two days early "so i could celebrate with all of you.less than three. "rachel steiner aka axisofanarchy."rachel, happy birthday!

marisha: huzzah!laura: huzzah! happy birthday! matt: she's been updating the reddit pagewith all the episode links. she's been great from the beginning.so thank you, rachel. happy birthday! cerulean kestrel donated $50. sam: wait, what's that name? matt and orion: cerulean kestrel. sam: oh, i like that. matt: might be an npc coming forward. "for my younger brother david,who graduates college tomorrow.

"i admire youand everything you've achieved so far. "also, critical role is a blast to watch. "thanks to matt mercer and crewfor a great show "and thank you, david,for introducing me to it." all: aww.marisha: congrats, david! matt: congrats on your brother'scollege graduation. that's great! scottydsntknw8? zac: doesn't know it. matt: oh, "scotty doesn't know it."ah, here we go. that's... very good.

marisha: scotty doesn't know. matt: that's an aol email waiting to happen. "thanks for the show. "really, it's one of the bright pointsin my life right now." that's awesome!thank you for watching, buddy. matt: g.e. oden, 25 bucks. "thanks for making thursday nightsthe best day of my week. "i happily support castand geek & sundry crew. "obey your overlord."

marisha: (laughs)matt: we do. taliesin: yeah, we do.laura: if you say so. matt: dresshawk, 30 bucks."every little helps, i hope." and it does. marisha: yes.orion: it does. matt: and the 826is going to get such a check from us. laura: yeah, oh my gosh. matt: weeklyfactoids donated 5 bucks."another good week, vox machina. "travis, i still need the specsso i can start working on the cosplay."

"also, liam, the knife is done. "i just have to finishlaura's bear statue. "less than three,a critical role cosplayer." laura: he made a bear statue?!matt: apparently! zac: and all you got was a damn emote, right? matt: if someone ends upmaking a sarenrae holy symbol for you... travis: what's his name? who's this? matt: weeklyfactoids. liam: weeklyfactoids is the guywho bought 8 shirts!

zac: wait,technically it's wheelyfactoids. liam: wheelyfactoids?laura: yeah, that's him. what, dude! travis: i've got an axe. i'll show you. matt: that's awesome. well done!thank you so much. timeout9288, 15 bucks. "love you guys. my friends and iare totally starting d&d "for the first timewith your inspiration. "also, travis willingham, "gazlowe is one of my favoriteheroes of the storm heroes."

travis: gazlowe?yeah, he's really stupid. marisha: you're gazlowe?travis: yeah, i'm gazlowe. marisha: i didn't know that! travis: he's the little goblinthat could, you know. matt: he's not quite as good as rehgar. laura: both of you, calm down. matt: and none of usare as good as jaina or illidan. laura: hold your peace. liam: don't fuck with grandpa illidan,all right?

travis: he's got no plans later.that could be really cool. matt: that's so awesome.woodyfoun donated a thousand dollars. (all cheer loudly) matt: "congratulations to you allon your tenth episode. "i'm sure all fans will agree. "i hope there will bemany more shows to come. "p.s.: laura bailey--insert harp accompaniment-- "can you please say,'eat lightsaber, jerk' "in your best kira carsen voice?love all of you."

travis: for a thousand bucks? laura: for a thousand bucks, yeah.now there's so much pressure. liam: what was it?matt: eat lightsaber, jerk. laura: eat lightsaber, jerk. there. liam: that is an amazing donation.thank you so much. all: thank you! matt: shomzer donated 25 bucks. "slowly fell in lovewith everyone in this d&d group. "keep it up, guys. this is somethingi look forward to weekly

"and it's incredibly entertaining." zac: was that negging?matt: negging? zac: was that negging?"slowly fell in love." matt: slowly fell in love. no!sam: no, that's good. taliesin: makes me want to work harder.that's all i'm saying. orion: he was just courting us at first. laura: yeah.matt: yeah. laura: but now he's in love. matt: to be fair,we're a bunch of weird folks on twitch.

it takes a little getting used to us. laura: you're in a very fabulouspurple coat right now. matt: i am.zac: no, i like his style. matt: thank you, guys.sam: i love my wife. matt: seekerpentegan, i think it is. ten dollars. "started watching critical rolebecause of laura and travis, "stayed because you're all great. "thanks for brightening upmy friday mornings. "i'm from germany, so the streamstarts at 4 am for me.

"it's totally worth itto get up so early for you guys." that's amazing! marisha: christ, 4 am? good morning! taliesin: good morning!liam: ah, tschã¼ss! sam: entschuldige.i don't know what that is. laura: danke schã¶n.did i say that right? taliesin: guten morgen!marisha: guten morgen! liam: you said thank you,he said excuse me, he's saying good morning.

i said see you later,see you next time, ta-ta. laura: oh, okay.matt: there you go. matt: e3kguru, $25. "thanking geek & sundryfor shows like critical role. "to the cast,thanks for taking the time every week "to bring us into your world. "much love to everyoneand happy tenth episode." thank you so much. orion: thank you!

matt: lukegoodatstuff, 20 bucks. "i didn't expect critical roleto be my favorite show on the channel, "but here we are. less than three you all. "it's been a fun ten episodes.looking forward to many more." all: yay! matt: locomotive also donated $1,000-- matt: to 826la charity. "critical role has beenthe most awesome show "i've discovered on twitch.thank you for putting this together."

thank you. that's incredible. liam: the two of youare extremely generous. thank you, and the charity'sgoing to have their mind blown. and thank you everyone for supporting. matt: yeah, we're going to get photoswhen we present them with the check and we're going to do a whole thing. taliesin: oh, if there's an 826in your city, by the way, go check it out. really, they have amazing stuff for sale. it's the best first date. it's great.

laura: they have the coolest stuff.marisha: it's always so much fun. laura: yeah, we have a bunch of postersat our house. taliesin: i've done so welltaking girls to 826. i'm not even kidding. marisha: it's true.taliesin: it goes very well. marisha: they've got great storefronts. taliesin: they've got a pirate store,a superhero store. they have a time-travel store. marisha: spy store. matt: i do want a novelty checkfor when we finally get these donations over.

laura: that would be awesome. matt: we're going to draw pictures on it. marisha: how much are those novelty checks? sam: a thousand dollars. matt: arislan donated $50. that's awesome! "happy tenth episode,hope you enjoyed your cake." aw, thank you guys! laura: thank you!i'm tweeting your cake right now! matt: "the only thing betteris your support of 826la

"and i hope my small contribution helps."it really does. thank you so much. orion: yes, it does. absolutely. matt: splattercat, 25 bucks.liam: splattercat. matt: "hey guys, day one subscriber. "when i first heard about critical roleit sounded too good to be true, "and even after ten episodesit still kind of is. "you guys are all awesome, "and i will continue to supportcritical role and geek & sundry "as long as we all exist."as long as we all exist.

liam: which should befor about one more episode. taliesin: we're double-checking. it is still five hit pointsto splatter a cat. marisha: yeah, five hit points.orion: really? marisha: thanks, splatterkitten. taliesin: we established that. we did. matt: all right, aranax06, $20."thanks for your amazing performance." thank you for your amazing donation. matt: tristandunman, five bucks."huge fan of critical role

"and just super inspiredby all you talented actors. "starting my own group soon "and using the power of my artto make it as awesome as possible. "thanks again, everyone. tristan."thank you, tristan. travis: thanks, tristan.orion: have fun! marisha: the power of art! matt: and ridlich, ten dollars."subbed the first day "i witnessed the awesomenessof critical role. "such a great channel.starting a campaign this weekend

"with a thrown-weapon fighterinspired by vax and his daggers. "keep up the great work." matt: guys, that's amazing.thank you so, so much. laura: you're so amazing.marisha: you're so cool! zac: so we're going to switch over to the dropcamand some music really quick, and we're going to get set upfor the q&a as fast as possible for you guys. matt: yeah.zac: stick around.

matt: hang out for a short time.we'll be right back. zac: this is just a couple minutesand we will get set up. matt: indeed. thank you so much. marisha: dance! zac: no, q&a. marisha: well, we can dancewhile setting up for the q&a. travis: you can dance. matt: more than a thousand.sam: yes. matt: you guys are amazing.i can't even.

liam: 1,034, presently. taliesin: oh my god.laura: that's-- yeah. marisha: 1,034? wow, that's huge. zac: lucas, did you switch over?laura: he did. lucas: i didn't. [music] matt: all right, are we on? hey, guys! orion: hey, everybody. matt: thank you so muchfor being ridiculous.

laura: so amazing! matt: we're glad you guys all tuned in,and are still tuning in to our show, let alone the support for the shirts. the support for the charity has been-- i think i speak for all of us--unbelievable, and we're so blessed and excited that we have such amazing friendsand viewers out there. you guys are the most amazing fanbasefor any show i've ever had. so thank you.

you guys earned this, most definitely.i'm willing to stay as long as we need. i know some people have familiesthey've got to get back to. sam: got ten minutes, tops. travis: i feel like this is trying to read the matrix, it goes so fast. "i want that jacket." matt: how many shirts were soldby the end of it? last i checked, we were at 1,032. zac: well, technically,we still have seven days. taliesin: the hawkeye? hot topic.

matt: the shirts are still availablefor another week. laura: how tall are you, travis?travis: six-four. laura: i saw that one.taliesin: you're six-four? ashley: the same heightas abraham lincoln. matt: it says, "pan main camera up." laura: oh, someone's askingabout keyleth's child murder. matt: it's saying the banner'scutting off heads in the back. liam: keyleth's, or marisha's?marisha: well. laura: can you see our heads now?

taliesin: dinner was great. travis: somethingabout tiberius's brother. zac: usually, if they say it,we've already noticed it. matt: who wants to pick a questionand run with it? laura: can we talkabout keyleth's child murdering? marisha: (laughs) travis: how did the kid die, marisha?taliesin: yeah, tell them. laura: this was sad. marisha: god, i got asked this questionat the panel over the weekend, too.

it's a hot topic. everyone wants to knowhow i killed the kid. well, we were fighting-- tell us about the fight. matt: over the courseof the first major arc of their campaign, every town they went to,there seemed to be this recurring themeof children disappearing, so they kept tryingto follow this thread and asking around, and these kids kept vanishing, and the one common threadthey were discovering was,

shortly before each kid disappeared, they began playing with a new kidwho had long black hair and golden eyes. and then they would disappearwithin a week of playing with that child. towards the end of the campaign,during a celebration, after they managed to savethe city of emon, they looked over and foundthat the sovereign uriel's child was talking to this black-haired,golden-eyed child. so the party, in the middleof a platform, grandstand, bowing before the townspeople,

they just pulled their weapons outand jumped off after this child, who grabbed the sovereign's sonand pulled him into this pocket dimension. what it turned out to be was this entity, which is a variationof the dread emperor, for those who are familiarwith that character. the dread emperor had createdthis pocket dimension world, this giant bramble forest that surrounded a gothic castlewhere it existed. this weird, messed-up individualbrought children there

because it loved to be aroundtheir innocence and their naivety, their sense of play. marisha: so basically,a sorcerer neverland ranch. matt: yeah. it was messed up. but once the children got too old,they were no longer useful, so he killed themand put them in a basement. so the party gave chase,they fought their way to the castle, and they discoveredthat what was dangerous about fighting this dread emperorin his library

was it was wearing golden armor, and attached to this armor via four chainswere four children by collars, and if anyone attacked him directly, he shared the damage he tookwith the children. marisha: and we actually foundthese clippers for the chain. laura: big golden scissors,but we put them in our pocket and forgot that we had them. marisha: we were like,"sweet clippers. pocket. keep going." and then we get to this emperorwith these giant gold chains

and we're like,"how do you break these gold chains? "if only we had clippers.oh, well, we don't." matt: however, you guys started attacking the chains with your weapons, and you were doing enough damageduring the first few rounds to save most of the kids. laura: but there was one kid left. marisha: so there was one. so we were tryingto get these kids away from us because we don't want to hurt them,but we wanted them away,

so i used a grasping vine,and i was trying to yank the kid away, but the grasping vine attachedto the chain instead of the kid, so with the chain at the collararound his neck, when the vine yanked-- matt: you broke the kid's neck. laura: i thoughtyou grabbed the kid's waist and he got pulled toward the thing,but the chain was still around his neck. matt: that's what happened.the vine wrapped around his body and it broke his neckbecause he was still attached. marisha: oh, that's right.

i should have grabbed the chain,but instead-- matt: you just grabbed the kid. travis: sam, what's it likebeing the sexiest member of the group? sam: is that what one of the things was? travis: yep.taliesin: we just want to know. sam: it's a lot like life. sam: i've come to accept it.it's the hand i was dealt. travis: matt, how do you dealwith writer's block, and when can we expect trinket plushies?

matt: trinket plushies would be amazing. i would love to expect thoseat some point in the future. taliesin: i want plushies for all of us. liam: we could expect trinket plushies.it might not be next week, but i feel like within 12 months,there will be a trinket plushie. matt: i'd like that. that would be cool. laura: if trinket survives for 12 months. matt: as far as writer's block?good music. i have a number of playlists,where if i'm having a problem,

i just close my eyesand listen to good music. a lot of soundtracks.i find elder scrolls soundtrack is great. stuff like that. gets my mind going. travis: how did the groupcome up with vox machina? taliesin: well... taliesin: oh, god.do we really want to tell this story? liam: how we came up with vox machina?is that the question? zac: they asked it! laura: yeah, our previous name.

sam: we needed to come up with a name. liam: we used to be the shits. we used to bethe super high intensity team, the shits. taliesin: the shits.ashley: which i'm still a fan of. laura: i think it's awesome.travis: yeah, me, too. shits forever. sam: some peopledidn't think that it was-- laura: some peoplethat are maybe druid and-- travis: royalty. sam: so we had to come upwith something less provocative.

taliesin: we tried to come upwith something as we were slowly gaining esteem. marisha: hey, there was a few of uswith family ties. taliesin: we were all like, "okay, perhaps we don't wantto be known as the shits." marisha: over here, as well,and over here. taliesin: no, i was with you. marisha: all these peoplewith royal family ties. taliesin: i have a family name. no.

marisha: can't be a part of the shits. "what have you been doingfor the last ten years, keyleth?" "well." taliesin: "i've been the shits." matt: someone asked if the groupwould ever do hot pepper gaming. matt and taliesin: (laugh) matt: there are plans in placefor most of us to partake. i don't know if everyone will,but some will. marisha: again.taliesin: quite a few. matt: yeah, so that will be fun.

liam: someone is askingwhat matt whispered to me when i insight-checked marisha. it's not what you think it is,and i'm not going to say. laura and ashley: ooh. laura: i saw, what color is trinketand what color is his armor? he's brown, and he's got silver armor. taliesin: we accept fanficas our personal savior. liam: it's moving too fast. travis: i saw, what level is everyone,and what is your alignment?

taliesin: just became ten.marisha: ten. matt: everyone's ten now, i think. ashley: i don't think i am yet,because i missed a lot of games. travis: alignments, starting with liam. liam: chaotic good.travis: chaotic good. tiberius? orion: huh?liam, matt, and travis: your alignment. matt: it's a q&a. orion: yeah, i know. these guys were talkingabout stuff i know about,

and i was responding to other peoplethat were talking on twitter. travis: what's your alignment?orion: chaotic good. travis: (laughs)laura: oh, that makes sense. marisha: neutral good.ashley: i'm chaotic good. travis: percy?taliesin: i believe neutral good. travis: i'm chaotic neutral. sam?sam: i think i'm neutral good. laura: i'm neutral good. ashley: wait, chaotic good?does that make sense? is that what i am? laura: i don't think you're chaotic.

travis: "is that what i am?" matt: (laughs) what is your alignment? ashley: what is my alignment?matt: you should look at your sheet. sam: i don't remember.i don't think it's on my sheet. orion: can you just be good? ashley: it says chaotic good. sam: what should i be, matt? matt: okay. it's not so much requiredto be lawful, like the older editions are, but it depends on the deity you chose.

i'm still keeping an eyeon your actions in the game. taliesin: there's so many.i'm trying to pick one. matt: that crack in your thingis still there. ashley: wait, but maybethe crack would get healed because of my honesty roll. sam: yeah, but that was a game thing.that wasn't a character thing. laura: no, that was definitelya character thing. liam: you've got a wicked streak. ashley: i've got a wicked streak, man.

matt: we'll see how it plays out. ashley: (groans) taliesin: this is liketrying to catch snowflakes. liam: on a related note, somebody wants you to say,"fuck you, dylan" for some reason. ashley: fuck you, dylan! travis: that was amazing, actually.matt: that was really good. travis: that hada lot of conviction behind it. travis: "liam, scoot in.we can't see you."

matt: come in, buddy.liam: aww. orion: scootch.marisha: is that better? laura: now we're all nice and cozy. liam: tiberius is chaotic inattentive?it goes so fast! laura: wait a sec."hey, guys, love the stream." zac: they want to knowhow you all got into voice acting. liam: hooking.travis: virgin sacrifice. matt: that's a long question.sam: how does anyone do anything? marisha: it's a long story.

matt: training to be an actor,and then pursuing the opportunities. liam: and then you met the right personwhile training to be an actor. taliesin: actingwith a desire for a bad haircut. marisha: and the abilityto work in your pajamas. laura: i can't read this fast.it's too much. sam: a lot of stuff for matt. travis: keyleth,do you have a holy symbol? marisha: who? me?travis: do you have a holy symbol? marisha: i don't have a holy symbol.not a druid thing.

i like the earth.i worship the earth. no deities. laura: you can still trust vexafter dread. i'm not the same girl. matt: whole different character.laura: whole different character. travis: are any of you guysgoing to gencon? liam: when geek & sundry arranges that. marisha: yeah, tell geek & sundryto take us there. laura: yeah,we thought that would be fun. orion: hit them up.tell them you want us there. sam: i do not thinki look like tim curry.

liam: with the beard, you did. matt: yeah, i can see thata little bit. travis: that's a good one!did any of you grow up shy? laura: yes.matt and taliesin: no. liam: yeah. matt: i was a ham. taliesin: i was a working actor. matt: oh, yeah, you were a child actor.you're like, "oh, i was working with spielbergwhen i was six."

laura: you were a child actor, too. liam: i was a spaz. i was so shy. i'm going to be blind as that manta rayby the time this q&a is over! matt: as a note, guys.for those of you that have seen mr. mom? matt: the little kid with the woobie? liam: the woobie. he's right over here. taliesin: this is howeverything goes wrong. this is what happens. ashley: i'm going to re-watch that.

liam: this goes right.we're playing d&d once a week! any interest in turning critical roleinto a comic book? yes. who will draw it, from the chat room? matt: yeah, that would be amazing. if anyone out there wants to make ita comic book, that would be great! travis: tiberius, would you say,"i encourage violence"? orion: when i want to. laura: (gasps) i just saw one that said,"laura, would you like "a giant trinket plushieto sit at the table with me?" and yes.

liam: yeah.laura: i would. liam: like an fao schwarz-size bear? taliesin: she might actually cry.laura: dude, that would be amazing. matt: someone asked,how did we all get into d&d? high school, for me. taliesin: high school.liam: high school. laura: these guys.travis: this. matt: for most everyone else, this. sam: this is my first time playing.

travis: liam's birthday party. liam: either high schoolor my birthday two and a half years ago. it was my birthday requestto play a one-off, and it turned into this. matt: yeah. this is liam's fault. marisha: my first game was with you,but then i've done other games since and i came back for this one. taliesin: i had played other gamesbefore you, but had never really experiencedthe sensation of playing d&d.

this was a whole-- there were levelsthat were reached that had never been reached before. marisha: i've hadsome frustrating dms, too. matt: it happens. sam: who's the youngest? laura: who's the youngest? liam: not me.taliesin: not me. laura: marisha? sam: probably marisha. she's, like, 16.

liam: i'm the oldest. marisha: in los angeles, there is no age,only age "rages." travis: "age rages?" marisha: age rages. travis and taliesin:i would like to age rage. marisha: i would like to age rage. sam: i think i'm the oldest. liam: no. i'm the oldest. laura: oh, my old brother.

liam: light!orion: (laughs) marisha: (sing-song) i will never tell. orion: tiberius isn't old. liam: no, i know that.you're an old soul. i'm may 28th, and you're when? sam: october 9th. taliesin: wait, how old are you?sam: 38. taliesin: i'm 38! sam: when's your birthday?

taliesin: january 19th. i'm the oldest! liam: what month?taliesin: january. matt: hold on. marisha: i'm 18 to 30. orion: i don't care; i'll just keep going. wizards who do magic,they have to pick it every day. sorcerers invoke it. they learn it from their beingand they cast it out that way. the character tiberius,figuring him out,

that predicted which way i went because i feel he wouldjust have it within him to do. the whole thing is,he's the keyser soze of the group, in a way,where he's the false buffoon, but he knows exactly what he's doing when it comes to a battleand other particular things. matt: yeah. awesome. taliesin: january 19this an awesome birthday. yes, thank you. matt: question: "how do we send you shit?"talk to overlord.

taliesin: probably in a bag. laura: don't send us shit.matt: small boxes of shit. zac: dm the overlord! orion: (english accent)we don't want no poo. matt: dm the overlord for where to sendyour boxes full of fecal matter. zac: thanks, matt.thanks so fucking much! matt: (laughs) zac: that's all i need.

they will send me fecal matter,and it's on you. liam: i think someone askedabout my birthay. laura and my birthday. the whole reason we are playing twinsis that we share the same birthday. laura: we are twins! liam: it's may 28th.laura: what, what! marisha: may birthdays! liam: she's older than me, though.laura: no, i'm not. taliesin: i can't read this,it's actually hurting--

travis: i'm havinga motherfucking aneurysm. marisha: i know,you're going to get motion sick-- matt: i know. real fast,a note to all you guys, because travis and laurahave a vacation planned in two weeks. depending on where we are in the game, if the party's about to go into fight k'varn and then they have to leavethe following week, we might actually take a week off and instead do a three-hour hangoutand answer questions,

and i might go over teaching peoplehow to play the game, because we don't want to do a boss fightwithout two of our party. so just as a heads-up,that might be something that happens. laura: sorry, guys.matt: we'll figure it out. orion: somebody wanted youto say something as trey. matt: (laughs) as trey? orion: yeah. that's what these shirts are,by the way. these are from type-0,the thing that we're in.

matt: "i hopeyou've enjoyed your game tonight, "and if you have any questions,please feel free "to put them on the screen. thank you." orion: "pay attention, yo." taliesin: i saw ventralmalcavian.i actually, in high school, played the malcavian princeof los angeles. it was fabulous. marisha: oh, that's amazing. taliesin: malcavian all the way.it was magical.

marisha: that's awesome. liam: i want to know the answerto one someone asked. "how did travis and laura meet?" all: aww.laura: adorable. travis: oh, back in dallas. like, right out of high school,we were in the same talent agency. laura: we did a job as extras togetheron a set. travis: with the silent extra talk. [no audio]

liam: were you good? marisha: oh, did you guysdo that on camera? that's so cute. laura: we sat for 8 hoursat the same table, and we couldn't talk to each otherbecause we weren't allowed to make noise. travis: we thought we were superstars.laura: yeah, we thought we were so cool. travis: "this is the greatest job ever". laura: and then just started hanging outin the same circles, and that was that. ashley: the rest is history? travis: she totally fell for me.

orion: that's adorable.marisha: it's adorable. sam: someone asked many questions. "when did pike and scanlanstart flirting?" or, "when did scanlanstart flirting with pike?" right from the beginning. travis: (laughing) yeah, no joke. laura: yes, like literallythe moment pike was in the game. sam: donatello's my favorite ninja turtle. liam: sam is my favorite ninja turtle.orion: mine, too.

laura: donatello is my favorite ninja turtle. sam: advice for bardsis sing loud, and sing proud. or play your flute or whatever. liam: that's more commonly known as"rock out with your cock out." taliesin: someone now askedhow you two met, now, too. marisha: people are now askinghow we met. sam: bard out with your heart out. orion: bard out with your heart out. matt: me and marisha met--a mutual friend of ours

was putting togethera sketch-writing group-- this was years ago. marisha: it was supposed to be snl,but geeky, nerdy stuff where we were going to writeand perform our own sketches. matt: those never pan out. marisha: that never happened. matt: not in l.a.marisha: yeah. taliesin: (laughs) matt: but we met there,

we harbored secret crushesfor about a year, and then when we reconnecteda little over a year later, i was out of a relationship,and she was just getting out of one, and we both started talking again.and then eventually we were like, "hey, this is cool.we should do this." marisha: you got me an auditionfor resident evil. marisha: and then i was like,"i owe you a drink." laura: is that the resident evilwe worked on together? taliesin: he was adorable.it was so adorable watching him. oh, god.

matt: it was for damnation,the cg movie. laura: oh, okay. i did that, too.matt: yeah. marisha: yeah. taliesin: back when we had a karaoke barthat we went to. i miss our karaoke bar. travis: do you ever want to be a playerand not a dm? matt: i do. it doesn't happen often.at all. but that's okay. taliesin: he's so good! matt: i'll have the opportunity.

liam: "will critical role continueafter the boss?" yes. laura: yeah!matt and taliesin: oh, yeah. sam: no! we're all going to die! travis: "zac, what wasthe most recent picture you shared with the community?" somebody is asking to see it.or asking me to ask you to see it. zac: oh, i'll show you later.it's inappropriate. sam: oh, yes, guys, by the way.ashley and i are dating in real life. orion: do they ship you?

sam: yeah, no, we've been togetherfor a couple of years now. travis: yeah, like, 40 years.ashley: 40-something years now. taliesin: on and off.sam: it feels like it. taliesin: on and off.ashley: on and off. taliesin: drama. just drama. ashley: it's a long time. you lose track-- liam: if you replace ashley with liam,it's true. travis: "pike, does scanlan have a shot?" ashley: i don't know; we'll see.

matt: "do you guyshave backup characters rolled "for when you get tpk'd?" sam: "we'll see?"come on, give me a hint! liam: i've got an idea. laura: aw, i saw,how did me and trinket become friends? taliesin: that's dark, people!that's really dark! liam: that's a good one! travis: how did you and trinketbecome friends? laura: okay, it's kind of a long story.liam: yeah, go for it.

marisha: wait, you and trinket?laura: me and trinket. marisha: yeah, i want to hear it. laura: i sent this short story to matt--what was it, a year ago? i just wanted him to knowwhy trinket was so special to me. it's such a dorky thing. liam: it really is a short storyand not a blurb. it was long. laura: it was a long thing.and it was all about, shortly after me and my brotherleft our family of the elves and we were setting off on our own

and he was off in the cityand i was making camp outside of town, these people came into the campand basically i trusted them too much, they kidnapped meand brought me back to their camp. and they were poacherson the black market. and i was in a cage and i could heara large creature in pain, and through my own wilesi got out of the cage, took out the two hunters,and i went to see what animal it was, and it was a giant bearin a lot of pain. unfortunately, it had been cut openfrom the middle,

they had been harvesting the bearbut they hadn't killed it, and it was really sad,so i felt terrible for it, and i put it out of its miseryand felt really bad about it. and then i heard off to the side,a small animal make noise, and i realized it was its cub. all: no! laura: so i took the cuband i felt really horrible, and that was also my first timei'd ever killed any people, as well, so trinket was very special to mebecause i wanted to protect him

and not let him experience that again. ashley: trinket. travis: did you eat the cub? laura: i didn't eat the cub!i saved the cub! travis: oh, the cub is trinket. laura: and i have nevereven told anybody about that. i never told vax about that,or anything. so trinket was mine. all: aw.matt: that's really cute. marisha: trinket.laura: yeah.

taliesin: bear love.orion: also adorable. ashley: trinket! taliesin: someone mentioned we should bring jennifer haleon the show as a guest. laura: ooh, she'd be pretty great.taliesin: that would be hot. matt: that would be interesting. liam: there's a short list for guests,and a long lists for guests, for down the road. matt: yeah, we're going to havesome fun people jumping in

for a few weeks here and there. sam: george clooney, anybody?liam: carrot top. sam and laura: carrot top, anybody? ashley: why do i have food in my hair? matt: because you're doing it right! ashley: anyway, who would you guyslike to see play d&d with us? travis: there we go,watch this thing light up. taliesin: yeah, that's a good question. laura: i'm seeing that"expect a crochet trinket."

i appreciate that. thank you. sam: let's wait two minutesuntil the feed catches up. taliesin: ashly burch.laura and travis: stephen colbert. laura: barack obama!travis and liam: barack obama. ashley: i don't knowif we can get barack obama, you guys. taliesin: i don't knowif we can get ashly burch. that's tough. sam: oh, not the president barack obama,some other guy. taliesin: george takei!laura: wil wheaton. taliesin: steve blum, troy baker.laura: tom hiddleston.

liam: tim burton?taliesin: vin diesel. orion: (laughs) tim burton?matt: i love vin diesel. marisha: hardwick. vin diesel!matt: we're working on hardwick. liam: my eyes are bleeding!taliesin: claudia black. laura: so many!sam: (deep voice) jon snow! liam: eliza dushku. travis: there's a laura emote! liam: elijah wood.laura: there is?! there's a me emote? matt: a lot of the peopleyou guys have mentioned, we're actually talking to.

i'm going to talk to nathan,i'm going to talk to chris-- laura: we're talking to vin diesel. sam: garfunkel and oates, yeah. matt: we don't knowif they're available. taliesin: garfunkel and oateswould be amazing. marisha: that would be hilarious.ashley: that would be great. sam: bards. they could be bards! matt: dame judy dench? yeah. marisha: steve blum.sam: troy baker? i don't know.

laura: who is that?sam: sasha gray. liam: pfft.sam: troy baker. ashley: sasha gray? taliesin: i'd play with them.that'd be awesome. ashley: sasha gray is a...?sam: porn star, yeah. liam: troy didn't knowwhat to make of this when we first started it. matt: yeah. i think he stilldoesn't to know what to make of it. laura: actually, no, you know what,

i've had conversationswith troy about it-- taliesin: peter dinklage. ashley: peter dinklageis on my hall pass list. laura: i don't thinkhe'd be opposed to joining the game. matt: really? laura: yeah, he seemed very interestedwhen he brought it up. taliesin: sir ian mckellen. matt: because my first conversationwith him about it was very brief and very much like, "cool."i was like, "okay..."

laura: i think because me and traviswere so excited about it-- matt: probably.laura: it grew on him. matt: yeah, we'll drag him in it sometime.laura: yeah. taliesin: wow, this is an amazing-- laura: matt oswalt,that would be such a fun guest! matt: danny sexbang, yeah.marisha: eminem. travis: if grog comes across his uncle,yes, he would definitely want to kill him. ashley: yeah.marisha: yeah. travis: bad relationship.

taliesin: you've had a little--marisha: we've had a run-in, once-- taliesin: we've had a run-inwith the family once-- travis: with his son, yeah. my cousin. taliesin: yeah. that was the only timeyou actually-- travis: let him go?taliesin: deflated a conflict. travis: yeah, well.matt: yeah, you stopped the fight. travis: my childhood affectionwas the only thing that let him live. matt: it was amazing. travis: but if we see him again,maybe a different outcome.

sam: hey, i have a question.i have a question for the dm. is there a spell or a portalor anything out there where we can all switch bodieswith each other? and i'm keyleth for a while,and taliesin is grog for a while? liam: what is this, an anime episode? sam: i don't know, it could be cool! matt: (laughs) there are artifactsthat can do similar effects, yes. laura: what?sam: i want to do that. matt: like soul transfersand stuff like that.

laura: that just seems messed up.marisha: soul transfers? taliesin: so would i be grog, then?marisha: no. sam: you would rage.taliesin: it would just be me as grog. liam: someone requested as a player,zac eubank. sam: i've heard of him.ashley: yeah. matt: probably try that guyin something. liam: zac, did you type that? zac: i would really hateto steal the show, guys. marisha: i don't thinki've seen you stand up so fast.

taliesin: we could havesome kind of freaky friday. matt: oh, this is a good question."what if a party member dies? "do we have to scratch outthe name on the shirt?" sam: you could buy a new shirt. matt: you're welcome to.it's a possibility. there are magics that can,through challenge, reverse death, but death is definitely a possibility and permanent deathis definitely a possibility. liam: somebody's going to die eventually.matt: it's probably going to happen.

travis: why are you asking the dm?don't put ideas in his head. ashley: it's possible that will happen. liam: but if it does happen,it's your fault. sam: that's a season two thing. ashley: this time around.when we fight k'varn. taliesin: that makes the t-shirtextra special. laura: ooh, what are lady kima'sand clarota's alignments? can we know that? matt: what's what?

laura: what are lady kima'sand clarota's alignments? matt: you don't know that. laura: we don't know that. matt: you have no cluewhat their alignments are. taliesin: i'm down for that. marisha: has anyone permanently diedat any point? taliesin: not in this game.sam: permanently? travis: in this campaign. matt: nearly.ashley almost died permanently.

sam: some of us have been in comasevery other session. ashley: hey, there is an emote laura! liam: throw up the laura emote,if there is one. sam: how do i get an emote? liam: is there a spirit in the room?make it known if you're there. sam: what's the weirdest thinggrog's ever done as a character? troll dick stuff... no, wait!he went and humped a fairy in another-- travis: you don't know what happenedwhen i went through the portal! sam: yeah, what happened up there?

orion: yeah, we don't knowwhat happened. travis: a barbariannever kisses and tells. taliesin: what about all the other stuffyou probably did? will you tell us about that? travis: we did summon a ponyand chop its head off. sam: that was fun.travis: and smeared its gore all over us. laura: you also collectedlots of dried poo and put it in the bag of holding. travis: we had a dried poo chunk.

sam: we used dried pooto blind the king a few episodes ago. taliesin: you rage-looted.the rage-looting was pretty much the most disgraceful thingi've ever seen. laura: yeah, the rage-looting.travis: disgraceful or amazing? marisha: that got us in a lot of trouble. orion: we accidentally killed the ox,right, because we stuffed it in the bag? taliesin: he felt guilty for weeks after.he felt genuinely bad about it. travis: minutes after. marisha: oh, there was alsothe time you slapped trinket on the ass

and i think you were sleepingon the couch that night. travis: that was pretty bad. laura: (gasps) we were goingthrough this thing. there were traps everywhere--electrical traps, everywhere. and all of us were being really cautious, and grog hits trinket on the buttwith the blunt of his axe and sends trinketrunning through the thing. travis: he needed to be motivated! laura: and he just hit every trapon the way through and almost died.

ashley: oh, trinket. travis: he was a little clumsy,but he got through, didn't he? travis: yeah? and then i slepton the couch for two nights. travis: i was in big trouble. taliesin: erika ishii, yuri lowenthal. matt: yeah, yuri's probablygoing to come in at some point soon. laura: he guested before we had the show.he came in our game. matt: yeah, he guested oncebefore the show. sam: he did?

matt: as ghost fist, the dwarven monk. laura: you weren't there. that was probably a nightyou were gone somewhere. travis: tiefling? what's a tiefling? taliesin: tieflings are like horned,pseudo-demonic-- liam: we haven't encounteredany tieflings yet. marisha: demon blood.taliesin: they're playables. laura: that's what i want to be if i die.i want to roll as a tiefling. taliesin: that would be awesome.

matt: you guys have seen them,but they're very rare in this setting. at least in this part of the world,tieflings are super rare. you haven't encountered themmuch yet. yet. liam: matt, someone's askingwhat's good to roll as if you are brand new to the game. matt: if you're brand new to the game?liam: fighter? matt: fighter's pretty easy. i personally would saypaladin or ranger are fun because you can tastea little bit of magic

but you're also combat-based. it's a nice introductionto how all things work, and the magic is a slow build.you don't get it immediately, so at level one, you're just a melee guy--or combat guy-- and eventually,you start getting abilities. i think the hybrid classesare good for that. taliesin: someone asked about percy.percy doesn't know if his sister died and percy doesn't have a planfor his family because right nowpercy is scared shitless

of everything going on in the north,so no. no. matt: someone else asked before, how often do players interactwith their personal stories? occasionally.there hasn't been much room for that since everyone's been undergroundfor this entire run, but there are personal storieshappening in the world and i'm sure they will come upas things progress, as well. they have in the past,and they're going to again. liam: someone asked, for fan art,

do we want the charactersto look like us? i think how we really look.i think either would be fine. a lot of the stuff that's coming in is based on the artwork ofa woman named kit buss. she took input from uson what we were looking for, and she did the initial art and people have riffed off that,which is great. matt: they're incredible. liam: if you want to make a dragonborn

that looks like orionwith his face pulled out, that's cool, too. marisha: yeah,it's your interpretation. sam: if you want to put my faceon every character, that's cool. marisha: we want to seedifferent interpretations. matt: that was a great photoshop.laura: somebody did do that. taliesin: someone did actually do that.that was really weird. matt: i think kit's artwork, we're using as the basisof the official art,

but you're welcome to createwhatever you want going forward. laura: kit's really talented. liam: could someone draw scanlan with the illusionary growthand the illusionary wang? laura: the illusionarygiant weird nipple? sam: third purple nipple?liam: yes. sam: and the donkey dong? liam: i mean, the donkey dongcould be in pants or something. it doesn't have to be pornographic.

laura: this makes me uncomfortable.matt: yeah. taliesin: there's just so much to read. matt: do you write a synopsisfor previous ventures? actually, the synopsis for each episode is on the geek & sundry websiteunderneath the episodes, so it'll tell you what happensin that episode underneath. just go to geekandsundry.com.he writes them all. liam: go to geek & sundry,then click on shows, then click on critical role,and that'll get you there.

laura: it'sgeekandsundry.com/shows/critical-role. liam: it's as easy as that.matt: yeah. so simple. travis: i thinkthis might have been covered, but how did the campaign start? matt: his birthday. liam: yeah, for my birthdayi said i wanted to play d&d for a night and i asked the people that i wanted,and they came, and then the next dayi sent out an email going, "oh man, that was so great.i feel like we should do that again."

and nobody responded for a day,and i felt ashamed and sad because i thought that i was a dorkand nobody wanted to do it, but then slowly,everyone trickled in going, "yeah, yeah, yeah."and here we are. marisha: oh, really?i didn't know you felt-- liam: yep. for a day, i was like, "oh, god. i just outed myselfas the biggest dork in the group." marisha, laura, and matt: aw. travis: is trinket's intelligencehigher than grog's?

liam: yes.laura: no. matt: no.travis: no. okay? it's not. laura: i think his intelligence is a four,so he's two points lower than you. travis: yeah, suck it.liam: that's very close. ashley: best and worst d&d memories. i can only read thatbecause it's in all caps. travis: best and worst?matt: best and worst d&d memories. sam: our six-hour games were pretty bad. travis: (laughs)sam: no, i love this.

laura: dude, they were like eight hours. marisha: how much do you writeand how much do you improv? i mean, someone said, how much do we writeand how much do we improv? everything the players do is improv. matt: yeah, there's no pre-planning. liam: matt's writing plot points,but he's improvising, too, and we have no ideawhat the hell's going to happen. sam: i write all my songs from scratch.

orion: every day he comes in.two hours, just writing songs. travis: does your full namefit into a tweet? taliesin: i have been specificallynot tweeting my full name yet. laura: why?travis: don't let them have it. taliesin: i've been really enjoying watching people attemptto figure out what it is. right now, percy's in a hole underground,so it's not his favorite place to be. taliesin: once i'm actually in a placeto try and impress people, i'll be saying my name more.

travis: did you ever considerdoing a longer episode? liam: i don't know.do you guys want to watch for five hours? laura: i know, that seems a bit muchfor you guys. marisha: we used to play for eight hours. laura: we used to play for eight hours! matt: someone asked why do i treat onesas regular failures instead of flops? because i run my campaigns pretty hard, and i think if 1swere critical fails the classic way, we would have tpk'd by now.

travis: what's that?matt, sam, and orion: total party kill. matt: because in some rule sets,when you roll a one, it's a serious-- i like treating itas no matter what you're doing, you fail, regardless.no matter what your bonus is, you fail. i think that's enough. in old campaigns i used to run,if you rolled a one attacking somebody, your weapon would go flyingacross the room and you'd fall on the ground. or if you were trying to lift a boulder,

the boulder would fall and crush youand you're dead. taliesin: yeah,i like the way you treat it. matt: which can be fun for certain games,but for this-- travis: why do you want us to die?what a shitty question. matt: for this, there's enough challenge where i think we don't needany more reasons. if it's funny and it makes sense-- if it's a difficult challengeand you roll a one, there might be some drawbacksto a failure in that case,

but i don't thinkit's a consistent thing i need to do. marisha: people are sayingto make them longer. liam: sam, i saw a questionwondering when you're going to make a weird al yankovic-esquecompilation of songs. sam: (laughs)liam: next month? sam: yeah, pretty soon.i'm working on an album. orion: we're going to bein the studio. sam: yeah, we'll be in the studio. taliesin: scanlan at sunset,coming soon.

sam: it's just mechanging the words to contemporary songs, but making them about dungeons & dragons,and i'll grow my hair like weird al. laura: there was one time, for a 1,that it was a really funny bad fail, and that was whenwe were fighting the dread emperor. ashley: oh, and you went through-- taliesin: throughthe stained-glass window. laura: and scanlan was tryingto get the final blow, and he rolled a one. ashley: that's one of my favorite moments.

laura: and the dread emperorliterally side-stepped him and scanlan fell out of a window. travis: he lunged and-- tell them. matt: yeah, so the dread emperorhad maybe three or four hit points left. people were hurt on the ground.it was this epic confrontation. laura: we were dying. travis: scanlan's never killed anything. matt: yeah, he's never killed anything. he pulls out his bladeand just goes for an attack

and we're all like, "yes, go!" laura: "go, scanlan!" matt: and he rolls a one, and it's him charging towards him,blade in the air. sam: (quiet war cry) matt: "you son of a bitch!" running. dread emperor just side-steps.scanlan goes flying-- liam: nothing but net. matt: loses his balance,

crashes through a three-story-highstained-glass window in the back end of this library,out into a bramble bush, with all the glass tumbling onto himand is like, "ow." travis: (laughs)matt: on the ground. ashley: it was oneof the funniest moments that we had. laura: it was really amazing.matt: it was pretty great. taliesin: it was amazing. ashley: i was crying,i was laughing so hard. orion: no holds bard.that's the name of your album.

sam: no holds bard. that's good.matt: no holds bard. i like that. liam: ashley. scanlan or steve rogers?ashley: oh, man. sam: or mr. rogers? ashley: that's a really hard choice.mr. rogers, for sure. i love mr. rogers. travis: when are you guysgoing to do a drunk episode? taliesin: have we notdone a drunk episode? marisha: a drunk episode? matt: someone asked, do i fudge my rolls? no, because at that pointit becomes too weird.

if you don't stickto at least what roll is there, then you lose the essence of fate, and i thinkthat's what makes it fun for me. it makes it scary becausethen i don't know what's going to happen. liam: scanlan has fudged a bedroll.sam: i rolled the fudge. marisha: question.worst possible enemy to fight? probably a beholder. laura: a beholder. taliesin: a beholder, i would imagine,is the worst.

sam: we'll find out.maybe he'll be super easy. orion: i don't know if you guys noticed, who's been watching this whole timewe've been playing, i generally do random chaotic things to be quirky and funnyjust because i like to, but this is the first time i was scared. i really freaked out with the confirmationit's a fucking beholder. it's terrible.

travis: you looked excited. laura: yeah, you did look excited.i think you were excited that you thought it might be a beholder,and then it was. orion: yeah, and then i was terrified. matt: it's going to be fun. orion: it was a deluge of terrorafter that. marisha: someone askedhow the party met in-game. that's a good question. laura: oh, that's a good question.

taliesin: you guys found mein a basement. laura: yeah! we saved you.taliesin: yeah, i had been arrested. matt: the very first game we played, you all had come togetheras individual mercenaries in the city of stillben,which is a swamp town on the far eastern sideof this continent. you all, for your own reasons,had come there because you needed money, you were trying to establishsome way of making your skills useful,

and there was a job board,and all of you came together in a tavern, saw there was a posting, and you decided to combine forcesand try it out. that's how that started. and then they met percy along the way.in a prison in the umbra hills. taliesin: we've never really discussedwhat i was doing down there. laura: yeah, i would like to know. taliesin: that's a story for another time. travis: so why did scanlantake a dump on that guest room bed?

matt: yeah, scanlan.orion: he's kooky. sam: you'll find outwhen that guy gets to his room. sam: and just... has the worst day. laura: (laughs)travis: (laughing) has the worst day. liam: we probably talked about thisin the last q&a, but i'm sure there'sa lot of new people here. they want to know about pike's death. marisha: yeah.laura: (fake cries) marisha: it was so sad.laura: it was so sad.

liam: keyleth looked at herand thought she was a kid, and then-- matt and marisha: (laugh) marisha: and i was just like,"i hate kids!" (pshh) matt: i'll try to make it quick. in what was the final boss battlefor the first arc, they were going towardsthe center of the city because a glabrezu,a treachery demon, had infiltrated the sovereign uriel,the king of the area, and his family. filled their bodies with shadesas opposed to their souls.

they managed to recover the family, but they got into a conflictwith the glabrezu, and as the fight was ensuing,pike got too close, the glabrezu took a swipe at her,and rolled a critical hit, and did enough damageto bring her to death instantly. so mid-fight, went down.the whole party froze. ashley: i had already taken some hits,and then i realized at a certain point, because in the pathfinder edition,if you're negative-- matt: your constitution score.

ashley: your constitution,and then i wasn't keeping track, and i looked downand it was way past my constitution, and i was like, "oh, matt?so what does it mean if you're this?" the look that he gave me,he was like, "oh." and he just paused because he was like,"oh, that. you're dead." ashley: he was tryingto figure out a way to say it. matt: it was awful. ashley: and i instantly started crying.i was like, "no! no no no!" travis: there's a video of it.

laura: all of us are crying.ashley: it was horrible! travis: you went under the table. marisha: it's on liam's vine.if you go find liam's vine, there's a five-second clipof all of us just screaming bloody murder. matt: it wasn't just likeshe fell and died. the glabrezu has giant pincers. grabbed her by the torso, lifted her up,and then snapped her in half, essentially. marisha: yeah.laura: it was terrible. matt: and they had to recoverboth halves of her.

taliesin: how long ago was that? matt: that was over a year ago.orion: it was a year, yeah. marisha: i remember you sayingyou'd had a bad week, too. matt: no, it wasn't a year.almost a year. ashley: i did. laura: you were on your way out the door, and then we talked you into stayingfor a little longer because we were getting into the fightand you were like, "okay, i'll stay." ashley: i was like, "i'll stay."laura: and then she died.

marisha: that's right,you were going to go somewhere. ashley: "in case anybody gets hurt." marisha: oh, that's right,because didn't you have guests? you had people who were visiting you and you went backand you're like, "(cries) you don't understand." matt: i definitely have ideasto keep the campaign going past level 20 and to epic or mythic stages. i would like to, if it goes that long.we shall see.

sam: what happens at level 20? marisha: we start killing gods. orion: there was a question for everybody.you cannot pick yourself. which is your favorite character? laura: oh, what's our--ooh, that's a tough one. liam: outside of ourselves. ashley: i would pick grog or scanlan,but also rogues. the damage that you can do is so crazy. travis: i pick mercer.nobody else can take it.

matt: i'm not a character.travis: you're many characters. matt: well, that's cheating.travis: is it? liam: oh, it's so hard.laura: that's so hard. i love everyone. taliesin: i think laura'sactually my favorite character. laura: really? taliesin: you have these very interestingemotional reactions to things that i find really entertainingfrom my side of the table. liam: scanlan is really hard to beatfor laughs, but tiberius is so quirky.i love that.

i love how klutzy keyleth is,with raw power at the same time. i'm very partial to my twin. laura: oh.taliesin: aw. liam: trinket is pretty great.laura: trinket is the bomb. liam: it's hard to pick. marisha: it's hard to pick.i don't know. i have a soft spot for grog. travis: oh, keyleth. orion: i agree. i would like to dothe complete opposite of tiberius with rage, and just tear shit apartwith my teeth.

marisha: i like percy, too.i'm not going to lie. taliesin: aw. laura: yeah, everybody's great. marisha: percy as a character. laura: i don't have as much fun playingif sam's not there because scanlan is such a funny,fun character, and your ideas for things. even right from wherewe first started playing, the things that you came up with to-- taliesin: burt reynolds.laura: yeah! burt reynolds.

travis: fucking burt reynolds.sam: he's coming back soon. laura: all these different thingsthat you would do, it's just so different. travis: burt reynolds,the customs officer. taliesin: with the badge. matt: that's oneof my favorite deterrents. you avoided essentiallywhat would have been a throwdown with the entire thieves' guild of emonby bluffing your way-- marisha: finger mustache.

matt: by pulling out a silver star--laura: and a fake mustache. matt: and convincing them that you were partof the customs department. orion: pike would be super funto play, too, because clerics are crazy. marisha: yeah, pike's great. taliesin: you're reallythe heart of the group. we don't pretend that losing you wouldn't have broken usinto tiny little pieces. matt: gilmore.sam: gilmore!

matt: you guys haven't met gilmore yet. laura: oh my god,you guys are going to love him. sam: i can't wait.taliesin: you haven't met gilmore! marisha: they haven't met gilmore. sam: what is it, gilmore's glorious goods? marisha and laura:gilmore's glorious goods. travis: we haven't been to gilmore's? laura: no, not since the show started. matt: they haven't seen emon yet.

ashley: another really special thingthat we've done is that during christmas time-- sam: oh, yeah! there's a christmas episode. ashley: we always have specials,or winter's fest. taliesin: we get to doa christmas special online this year! ashley: and we always give each otherpresents from our characters. and it's probably my favorite thing, ever. taliesin: it is so amazing.ashley: it's so amazing. marisha: we come in christmas pajamas.

ashley: the first christmas,grog gave me two pine cone earrings. laura: literally pine cones. it was street. travis: they were pine cones. marisha: i still have the pine conesyou gave me. taliesin: i still havethe bag of leftover ikea crap. matt: that's a good question,which laura should answer. what kind of dice do you all use,and what do you do with bad dice? orion: (laughs)marisha: oh, i love your dice thing. ashley: i currently want to burn my dice.laura: yeah, you should.

ashley: because i've been rolling like a-- travis: you had a good initiative. laura: i've told you the last five gamesto get rid of your dice. ashley: i know you have. laura: because that's what i do.if i roll with a-- travis: yeah, you are fickleon your dice, though. come on. laura: i am fickle. if i roll a one,it's gone for the game. i won't roll it again. but if it rolls badmore than three times,

it's out. it's gone. orion: it's done. marisha: you have a dice graveyard. laura: there is a dice graveyard,and i spent a lot of money on these really beautiful amethyst dice. orion: and they're garbage now. marisha: you should auction them. you should auction all your graveyard dice. laura: i should!orion: no! they're cursed.

laura: that's true. but they're beautiful. taliesin: they're worth more moneybecause they're cursed. orion: oh, you could buy cursed die,which is now a mystical item. liam: guys, there is no god, and it is the cold, random chanceof the universe. orion and matt: (crack up) ashley: only cold, random chance of what?liam: of the universe. laura: no, because some people roll bad.some dice roll bad. liam: there's no magic dice.

taliesin: there is only one god,and it is-- taliesin and matt: the dice god.marisha: the dice god! taliesin: he is cruel and painful. orion: that is true.when it comes to dice. ashley: just, on principle,i can't buy new dice because i'm like, "it's not the dice." laura: it is the dice!liam: it's chance. taliesin: you got a cool custom die.marisha: i did get a custom die. taliesin: she's got a custom die,and it's awesome.

orion: i'd pay for cursed dice,so we're good. sam: oh my god. that's daunting. matt: i did see a question someone asked.who has the most magical items? tiberius. taliesin: tiberius.matt: tiberius is a hoarder. orion: wait, what happened? matt: someone askedwho has the most magical items. marisha: someone asked mewhat my favorite animal to turn into was. i'd have to say it was probably my tiger,my saber-toothed tiger. ashley: minxie!marisha and taliesin: minxie.

marisha: minxie form, which grog namedbecause grog and i went on a-- travis: we intimidated this-- marisha: we wenton an intimidation mission, and i was his pet tiger minxie. matt: i like that. the name of the one true dice godis rngesus. for random number generator. travis: i love it.taliesin: (laughs) marisha: rngesus!matt: that's great. ashley: hogwarts houses?

laura: i'm a hufflepuff.marisha: what would rngesus do? taliesin: hogwarts houses?orion: is that a group question? liam: hogwarts houses, everyone?ravenclaw. laura: hufflepuff.matt: hufflepuff. marisha: ravenclaw.taliesin: slytherin. sam: never read it. never saw it.laura: (gasps) sam: don't know anything about it.seriously. liam: bullshit.sam: don't know anything about it. travis: nothing? zero? nada?sam: don't know anything about it.

laura: slytherin.taliesin: slytherin. liam: hufflepuff.sam: is that like a-- laura: no, he's not a hufflepuff.he's a slytherin. liam: sam?matt: you're a slytherin. liam: what the fuckare you talking about? laura: what are you?orion: i'm a slytherin. matt: hufflepuff! sam: i'm waiting to read itto my son. laura: we've got a lot of slytherinsin our group.

marisha: no gryffindors in this bitch.get out, gryffindor. get out. taliesin: actually,when the final book came out, we went to one of those borders partiesand i had my little slytherin robes. i have slytherin robes. and all the slytherin kidswere hanging outside of borders smoking clove cigarettes and hustling little gryffindor kidsfor their book money. taliesin: it got really dark.ashley: that is awesome. liam: someone continues to ask.

in the last q&a,i referenced going through a rough patch, and they want to knowif i'm still going through it, and how d&d helped. sam: okay, bye, guys. orion: oh, shit.sam: good night. liam: yeah, i had a problemwith one of my ears. it's like two years in.no one has diagnosed it correctly. in the beginning,it was wildly disorienting. i didn't know what was going on.

the symptoms were way more extremethan what i'm going through now, so it's not gone, but it's managed, and i've found that running helps a lot,which is why i run like a madman now. and... the most important thingin my life is my wife and my two children. the second most important thingin my life are the people on this couchand this bench. it's kind of eclipsed my job, for me,in the last couple of years. looking forward to these nightswas huge for me,

both when i was in the thick of itand still. and i look at everyone hereas a second family. ashley: oh, liam.marisha: we love you. laura: i'm going to makea liam plushie. ashley: yeah, man. matt: love this guy here.look at all the hearts. travis: oh, yeah, we've got to goon honesty hour now. give them the whole shebang.ride the feels. matt: has pike tried healing? (laughs)

laura: it's a medicine rollover and over and over again. matt: she heals quite a bit.it's been awesome. i've seen this a bit.advice for first-time dms. i'll give a bunch of thatif we end up doing the week off, but quickly, i would say, improvisational classeshelp tremendously, but being able to think on your feet. be open to players being creative.don't always shut people down. it's not you against them. it can be,but i like to think of it more open.

you can let them trywhatever they come up with, but depending on how elaborateor how ridiculous it is, it might be really hard to happen. and let them fail spectacularly,because it makes a great story. build out a sheetof a bunch of fantasy names in case they go to a placeor meet an npc you weren't expecting. then you can just pick a name and make something upon the spot about it and take notes afterward.

liam: that's nothow you do it, though. matt: it's how i used to do it.i wouldn't know where people would go and i'd have a whole list of namesand i'd be like-- liam: you just have the universeprinted on the inside of your skull. matt: kind of. but i still have to pick outof random places sometimes, depending on what you guys do. liam: oh. taliesin: i don't want to knowhow it's done.

laura: i know. no. marisha: he's destroying the illusion. liam: this all exists somewhere else,doesn't it? matt: most of it does.i write a lot of it up, but there are momentswhere you have to pull out of the ether because players go this wayand you're like, "uh... all right, "let's see where this goes." but have fun.learn the rules well because everyone's going to lookto you for rules.

have fun. let players play.let them be creative. and let them succeed or failspectacularly. marisha: have we everthrown a total curveball at you, where you've had to do that? where you've had to be like, "uh... uh..." matt: a few times. i tend to preparepretty openly and loosely so i can have some realm of understanding where you guys are going. marisha: like that time

we sneaked in the back doorof the thieves' guild? matt: yeah, that was--liam: that was one of them. laura: because we just wentstraight for it. liam: what about when grog decidedhe wanted to vet people to guard greyskull keep? liam: that was pulledout of your ass, right? matt: a lot of thatwas pulled out of my ass. liam: very well done.taliesin: that was amazing. laura: oh, yeah.ashley: that was so great.

sam: we haven'tgone to the keep yet, have we? laura: i know, we haven't been back. liam: not since we left.the last private game before this. travis: we got the last six guardsthat are totally awesome. ashley: our warm, comfy bedsthat we haven't gotten to sleep in yet. laura: ooh! which game of thrones housedo we belong to? travis: baratheon.laura: stark. ashley: probably stark.sam: slytherin. marisha: slytherin. (laughs)taliesin: greyjoy.

orion: somebody asked if tiberiusis inspired by a particular wizard or something like that. he actually is.somebody mentioned elminster. liam: tony roberts.orion: tony roberts. that's exactly-- matt and orion: (laugh) orion: that's going to be funny,if i actually do that. but no, tiberius is actuallybased off elminster aumar, who i play in neverwinter, the mmo. i booked that before we started the group, and then when i decidedto make him a sorcerer, i was like--

it was right at the same time, too-- matt: yeah, same time. orion: we just started to play,and that happened, and... yeah, so he's a dragonborn elminster. liam: billy mays, here,for the wizard's academy! ashley: billy mays here,with another fantastic creation. sam: are scanlan's feelingsfor pike mutual? pike, come on, give us a hint. travis: yeah, give us something.

marisha: i know, it's been two years,and we don't know. ashley: i just don't know, because pike's heartmight belong to somebody else. laura: (gasps) sam: wait, what?i never heard this in two years! ashley: it's my backstoryas a character that's just personal. it's my secret that i deal with,whether people know it or not. matt: intrigue! travis: you're in lovewith the dread pirate roberts? laura: i told everybodymy trinket story.

ashley: it's somethingi'm still working out. i haven't talked to matt about it. matt: let a girl keep her secrets. sam: well, maybe scanlanhas somebody else in mind, as well. taliesin: well, this got uncomfortablereally quickly. marisha: yeah. (laughs)orion: scanlan, denied! matt: i did not startwith newgrounds voices, but i have been watching newgroundssince late 90s. ashley: but that doesn't meani couldn't possibly love scanlan.

sam: there's a chance?ashley: there might be a chance. orion: that's all you need. sam: i could change your heartwith enough spells. ashley: (laughs) travis: were you guys ever playingduring the d&d scare of the '80s? whatever that means. sam: what does that mean?ashley: what is that? matt: oh, the chick tracts. laura: oh, when they saidit was satanic and stuff? no.

taliesin: no, i wasn't playinguntil the '90s. travis: no, we're all much younger. liam: maybe in '89,i might have been. travis: important: how sexy is grog?as sexy as you want him to be. matt: enjoy your boxes, buddy! liam: yeah, i startedwhen i was 10 or 11 in grade school, which was the very end of the '80s. taliesin: oh my god,this is going so fast. travis: can we have a kima wedding?

laura: oh, grog and kima.travis: i'm working on her. taliesin: where do you getyour awesome shirts? they want to knowwhere your shirts come from. travis: oh. taliesin: the internet.travis: yeah. orion: we did start this campaignin a different thing. we started in pathfinderand for a lot of us, me included, that was the first time playing d&d, so matthew home-brewedeverything in pathfinder,

and then right beforewe decided to do this, we switched over to 5th edition. matt: it was betterfor a group this size. i think pathfinder with eight players becomes too weighed-downwith floating modifiers, and it becomes very difficultto keep fluid. it's fine if you're a bunch of friends at home playing for eight hours, but when you're playingin front of an audience of thousands on the internet every week,

we have to use a systemthat makes combat go a lot quicker, so 5th edition was the way to go. liam: i see a good one.i have an answer, i'll start. matt: there's your emote, laura.liam: there it is. laura: oh, greg did it.oh, with a little porty emote. that's cute. thanks, greg miller. travis: you and a wiener onscreen. liam: someone wants to know what our favorite moment has beensince we started critical role.

mine was sneakinginto the illithid captain's room with scanlan, holding a bucket of poop.i was scared to death. i didn't know what was going to happen,and it went great. matt: yeah, you guys rolled really well. liam: it was electric. that was mine.anybody else? taliesin: my first crit with my new gun, which was also my first killwith my new gun. laura: that was so awesome. taliesin: that felt really good.that felt good.

matt: taking out the abyssal abomination. taliesin: that felt nice. sam: i think, for me,i enjoyed springing keyleth out of jail by convincing the guardsshe had pubic lice. travis: (laughs)marisha: yes. matt: yeah, i forgot about that.laura: was that during the game? taliesin: that was not during the show.laura: oh, that was before the show. sam: before the show. oh, okay. marisha: that was a good one, though.laura: that was a good one.

marisha: was that the same time where i ran at the walland started foaming at the mouth? sam: you were crazy. laura: yeah, and we had to bust you out.that, and percy was an awesome lawyer. taliesin: oh, that's right! sam: we had a whole phoenix wright party.taliesin: i'd forgotten about that. marisha: we basicallytook the insanity plea to get me out of prison, as a team. laura: that's a good question, matt.i just saw, if we all die

or if some of us die, do we have to roll in at a level one,or do we start at a higher level? matt: no, you guys would starta level behind the rest of the group. the detriment to it isyou would be a level lower. that is the drawback of dyingor losing a character, is you would be a level or a half-levelbehind the rest of the party. laura: on top of losing a character. sam: new character would be rough, man.ashley: that would suck. matt: it's possible.you guys all know it.

we all knew it going in. sam: can i come backas spider-man or something? matt: i'm not going to hold that back. taliesin: you're not spider-man? matt: i'm not going to be marvelin this bitch, okay? i'm not going to be like,"oh, death. "i can take it back any time,and it doesn't matter anymore." no. travis: do you design specific thingsfor an hourglass? are there particular scenariosthat require it?

matt: there are.it's harder to do in the underdark. there aren't so many trapsor timed circumstances. i like the hourglass for certain circumstancesthat have a very definite time limit, and i do think up what the challenge is,what type of skills would work, or let the players come upwith creative ways that they can apply their skillsto a situation to succeed, and i figure out,loosely off the 4th edition rules, where i have number of successes vs number of failures

in that period of time, and if they don't manage to do itin that time period, it's a failure. i think it's fun.it builds the tension, and the party goes, "oh, shit!we've got to do this now!" i love it. hourglass is awesome. laura: do we playany other tabletop games? sam: risk.taliesin: yeah. ashley: risk. marisha: how do you mean, tabletop?all tabletop?

liam: board games, anything. orion: i'm a bigmagic: the gathering guy. we play. marisha: yeah,we like magic: the gathering. ashley: settlers of catan.marisha: settlers of catan! matt: mansions of madness.taliesin: mansions of madness. yeah. marisha: i think the four of us hereare all warmachine hordes players. liam: i've been playingthe board game dungeon, which is d&d-inspired. someone also asked, what's a good way

to get your wife or your kidsor friends involved. i yanked my eight-year-old son inby playing dungeon with him, and he totally got into itbecause of dungeon, and now i am dming a gamefor three eight-year-olds. matt: which is awesome. liam: it's like d&d-lightin a board game, and if they like the board game, you can say, "you know, if you like this,we can ratchet up a bit." marisha: yeah,there's also d&d board games.

branded d&d board games that are fun.mini dungeon delvers. they're fun. orion: i will be on mulligan soon, and i like red and white, blue and black,and all the colors of the rainbow. laura: i just did that show with wil. titansgrave, which isa different tabletop rpg, and it's really fun. matt: how do i handle experience leveling in this game? at certain milestones,when characters have a chance to rest-- have a breatheror sleep for the evening--

then that's when experienceis divvied out for the next session. characters don't levelin the middle of a battle, or anything, but i keep track of it,usually on a session by session basis, and if there's a moment of rest,then people can level up. i also saw a question, when did percy build the bad news,and how long did it take? taliesin: bad news was builtduring the changeover to 5th edition. took about-- matt: four or five months.

taliesin: yeah,it was about four or five months. matt: in-game. taliesin: in-game. sitting at a table just tinkeringand tinkering. travis: somebody askedhow i became a goliath because it's not an official racein the book. is it not an official race? liam: it's now in 5th edition,in one of the added books. travis: now it is.i think i asked matt what the bigger creatures werein the world

and he said orcs and other things and he also said there were goliathsthat were half and half and i was like "can i be that?"he was like, "sure." travis: that was a thingi asked marisha once, during our first game, was, "wait, i can do whatever i want?""kind of." marisha: do whatever you want.it's awesome. travis: you can try!marisha: fun, imaginative world. matt: how is critical role going,compared to how you envisioned it?

sam: pretty good!orion: envisioned it? matt: one of our biggest fearswhen this thing came to our attention, when geek & sundry contacted us, was we didn't want itto change the game for us. we did this together for fun. we enjoyed it, and it was justa wonderful thing for us for two years. orion: two years plus, man. matt: and so our biggest fearwas it changing that dynamic, and so we tried to be very carefulthat we didn't alter how we played,

and didn't change the format, really,other than having cameras. liam: we didn't want itto turn into a reality tv show. laura: i was worriedeven when we were figuring out the setup of the tables,how it was going to work, that being far away from each otherwas going to screw things up, but it's just likewhen we were playing at our house across the table from each other. matt: just a little more distance. there's been very little change,except we have other people now

that we don't have to spend hourstelling them, "oh, what we do is we play this,and this is what happened." you guys already knowbecause you watched it, and it's awesome. marisha: yeah, that's true. liam: there's a light gooseto the energy because it feelslike we're doing theater, which is the one added differencethat i like, because when we played at home,we would have moments

where we'd go into lullsor get tired or something, and that doesn't happen here. laura: we're also only playingfor three hours, as opposed to eight. orion: and i'm drinking a lot less. taliesin: it's much more kinetic. travis: how do you handlepercy crafting things? taliesin: i make a standard roll,plus-- what is it? is it dexterityand a modifier on top of that? matt: yeah, he's proficientwith a tinkering kit, essentially,

so it's a proficiency bonuson top of that, and what it will be is, he'll tell me or describe to me the schematicsof what he's trying to build and what materialshe has at his disposal, or ask me what he needs for it-- taliesin: i built keyletha special staff, ages ago. marisha: yes. matt: so if he has the materials,i'll tell him how expensive it is, or how to get the materials,and he attempts the roll.

if he fails, wastes all the materials.it's a complete waste. taliesin: man, i've been doing a lot,lately. matt: if he rolls decent,it's functional, for the most part, but the thing with tinkering is it doesn't always quitework how you want. if he rolls really well,then it's pretty damn good. taliesin: and i get a bonusif i'm actually back at the keep. matt: at the workshop.the keep has a workshop for him. laura: i saw a thingasking what was it like

shooting the opening credits. marisha: that was fun. laura: being in costume for itand everything. liam: silly. laura: which is really funny, because we did not plan on being in costume. travis: no, we thoughtmaybe one or two things. laura: like a bracer or carry a weapon. taliesin: and then matt and iemptied out our ren faire closets.

travis: and then alcohol made its way in. laura: we all showed up and were like,"oh, this is cool! let's put this on!" marisha: yeah, it just kept gettingmore and more involved. orion: everybody give a quick huzzahto jareth. all: huzzah to jareth! orion: he graduated high school today. laura: oh, nice! congratulations.matt: congratulations, buddy. marisha: congratulations! travis: somebody asked,"if you accept fan art,

"would you also accept someonemaking fight music for the game?" liam: yeah.matt: totally. taliesin: we don't want to tell anybodywhat not to do. sam: i would accepta small statue of pike that i can hold near my breast. taliesin: i don't want to see that. laura: didn't you have one made?sam: i did have one made in-game-- ashley: and that's what saved my life. laura: (gasps) that's right, it did!it saved her life.

sam: i made two. i made one of methat i gave to you, and one of you that i keep with me. taliesin: is it overwhelminghaving 8,000 people watching? travis: no.taliesin: no. matt: it's not overwhelming.it's really cool. it's good to knowthere's people out there that have any interestin dungeons & dragons. i grew up an indoor kid. i was not quite sureif i could tell people i play this game,

and now peopleare much more open to the idea, like, "oh, dungeons & dragons!" it used to be like,"you play d&d? what the shit?" now it's, "you play d&d? what's it like?" it's much more open. it's great. liam: one of our favorite things about all the feedbackwe're getting through social media is how many of you guysare starting to play the game. all: yeah, that's cool.ashley: that's awesome.

marisha: everyone should try d&d. taliesin: the world would bea better place with more d&d. marisha: the world would bea better place with more d&d. liam: somebody asked what each of our favorite thingabout playing d&d is. the people. we all do a decent amount of gamingin this group, so this just feels like the most social,friend-oriented-- it just feels realbecause we're hashing it out together

instead of doing this. travis: personalities are fucking great.orion: which isn't bad! liam: which is great! we all do it,but it's a nice counter-balance. orion: somebody asked why tiberiusis so loyal to keyleth. tiberius comes from a presidential family. a family of political power,of high-seating in his land, so he's very honorable,and keyleth is royalty in his eyes. he didn't know, because thatwas a reveal for keyleth's character. i think it was a year and a half,we were playing,

and then you revealed it. marisha: it was a whilebefore i told you guys i was a princess. liam: hey, it's scott white."happy 10th episode." hey, scott! all: scott!matt: thanks for coming! liam: actor scott white. travis: people asked if this will beon video on demand or if people miss it,how do they see it? sam: pay per view. zac: it'll be up on the website.marisha: on the website.

taliesin: i think we'rejust both really snooty, which is why we kind of hang out. laura: dude, scott! i was just talking to amanda wyatt todayabout your concert the other night, and i wish i would have been there. sam: no.laura: different one? sam: no, it's a totally differentscott white. taliesin: someone asked if it's weirdnot being a fantasy character in a fantasy setting,for percy as a gunslinger.

i really like it.i will actually admit that i've always been fascinatedby that moment in history where suddenly we wentfrom bows and arrows to guns, so i really like the idea of being the guywho made that terrible mistake and had this really bad idea,and i'm really enjoying... marisha: rping that guy. taliesin: rping that guy,and trying to figure out what would drive a human beingto do something so stupid

as to invent a gun. liam: i love that we have percyin our group. marisha: which i think is why percyis one of my favorite characters. taliesin: he's really screwingthe entire future, at this point. orion: somebody asked us a fun question. if each of us could have a familiarlike trinket, if we could have our own animal,what would it be? marisha: like as our character? laura: like a pet?marisha: in-character?

orion: tiberius, of course, would have a small dragoniteor pseudodragon. definitely. taliesin: flying squirrel. liam: that's what iwas going to fucking say. taliesin: bam! orion: oh, and the dragon's namewould be monty. marisha: keyleth would probablyhave a mountain lion. keyleth likes cats,and she lived in the mountains, so something nativewould have been mountain lion-y.

orion: thanks, effigy. matt: thanks for staying, sam! sam: oh, yeah. bye, guys!all: bye, sam. matt: sam's got to run back to his family. taliesin: sam! text me the change in schedule,if you get a second. zac: i actually thinkthat's a pretty good time to start winding this down. orion: it's only 11:30.

zac: it's been an hour-long q&a,so i think it's a pretty good time. marisha: it's been an hour? matt: all right,so we'll get a few more questions here, and then we'll go aheadand close it on this, guys. marisha: going back to the questionof my favorite thing about d&d, because that kind of got segued out. aside from the people, i think that it's somethingreally fantastic-- not to sound cheesy-- and magical

when a group of grown adultscan get together and use their imaginationand have an amazing time, and my favorite thingabout dungeons & dragons is when you walk away from it,and especially after you've slept on it and after you meditate on it,it's pretty much real. it's just as real as other things we doin our day-to-day lives. if you guys noticed how excited we got when we were like, "oh my god,you guys haven't met gilmore yet." and all of us went, "oh my god. gilmore."and we all got excited over an npc.

orion: nothing that exists, really. laura: i dream about our characters. marisha: yeah, i do, too.yeah, i have dreams. laura: isn't that crazy! marisha: because for us, gilmore is real, and pike is real, which is whywe all fucking cried our eyes out when pike died. taliesin: is it my imaginationthat gilmore is blond, by the way? does everybody else see gilmoreas very blond?

laura: oh, i pictured gilmorewith black hair. ashley: i pictured himwith black hair, too. taliesin: i saw big curly blond hair. laura: oh, i like that! i pictured him with black,slicked-back, greasy hair in a ponytail. taliesin: i can see that, too. orion: what's your favorite part, ashley? ashley: it's funny,because when we first started, and for the two yearsthat we've been doing it,

there was an elementthat i liked about it, that it was just ours,and then when i would try to tell people, i was like,"ugh, they're not going to understand." we get to go and play make-believe, and nobody is judging anybodyand we can just go do it. so i was hesitantwhen we were starting the show, but what's been awesome is that you guyshave been so accepting and such an amazing groupin the chat room.

and how you guyshave been supportive of us. this has been one of my favorite thingsthat i've been a part of... in my life? that's a really bold statement. matt: no, i feel the same way. ashley: i love it so much.after two years, obviously there's so much moreof an attachment to it, but i just love it.i love it so much. taliesin: everyone's so nice.i barely believe it's the internet. matt: oh, look at all the ashley hearts.

taliesin: aww.ashley: hey, man. zac: somebody wanted to know if any of you guyshad ever reached god mode status in past d&d campaigns. marisha: no.taliesin: yes. zac: yes, you have? taliesin: yeah, i did. but my dm was not very good,so the game got so boring we quit because our dm was weak.

matt: someone askedabout the pewdiepie thing. what it was like dming for him and ken? it was fun. they were great.they were a lot of fun. we only had half an hour to play, both for me to teach themand to play through a session, so it was a very new challenge of, "all right, let's do this!"dungeons & dragons. but it worked out pretty well. we had a good timeand left on a cliffhanger,

and as long as they wantto keep bringing me back to do it occasionally,i'm happy to, so let them know that you enjoyed it and they should have me back,because it was a good time. orion: i'm going to saywhat my favorite part of d&d is. marisha: what's your favorite partof d&d, orion? orion: much like doing improv,it's a wonderful escape. i know i'm really franticin how i play it. poor matthew. he puts up with arguments about spellsthat i want to make super op,

and he's like, "you can't do that."i'm like, "but why?" those are our arguments. matt: just keeping the balance. orion: when we got togetherand we would play for 8 hours, we would get togetherand have lunch or dinner and we would spend a lot of time,and every game was a very special day, so no matterif the day was going great or not, it didn't matterbecause as soon as the game started, it was a whole different worldthat we had to step into,

and now we live in it and we breathe it. it's great. we're all actors, and to get lost in each other,and with how matthew narrates, and you'll see itwhen you watch the show, i'm like, "oh," and there's cameras now,and that's a whole other layer, and i still get lostin keyleth shedding a tear, and the wayclarota interacts differently. i don't see matthew doing it.i see (creature noise) that. laura: isn't that crazy

that it's instantly clarotaand it's instantly kima? it's not matt anymore,as soon as it's that character. orion: so it is that senseof realistic magic that exists every single game. marisha: it's weird, too,because i almost feel like bringing the game publicand for everybody else, and the fact that we're doing it weekly, it's almost bled the reality lineseven more, because now they are like,"oh, yeah, totally. clarota.

"yeah, we totally knowwho you're talking about." and so we're like,"yeah, clarota, right?" you guys know clarota.and we're getting fan art. taliesin: this is the speedour personal text messages, or group text messages, go at. marisha: (laughs) yeah, it's true. ashley: our group text message threadis insane. ashley: the fan artthat you guys have been putting out is so amazing.

laura: it makes us so happy. zac: we're working on getting all of thatup on the website. we're working on it. laura: awesome.matt: that's going to be great. laura: i save so many picturesto my phone. liam: i save it all. laura: i have no reason for it, but i scroll through itwhen i'm by myself. liam: i have a process. it goes into my iphone folder,and then right into dropbox.

taliesin: you find all the good stuff. laura: yeah, you finda lot of good stuff. liam, man, you find so muchon the internet. taliesin: he's the winnerfor finding stuff. liam: pile of shit has a thousand eyes. taliesin: i love watching peopletake risks. that's my favorite thing about d&d:it's such a good place to take risks. and the rewards that come with itare so fantastic. matt: two quick questionsi want to answer real fast,

when you're done. taliesin: no, i'm done. go ahead. matt: one: how did iget into dungeon mastering? by havinga really terrible dungeon master. orion: (laughs)liam: thanks to that guy! matt: yeah.really nice guy in high school. my first couple of games i ever played,and he was just terrible, and he had a player characterin the group that was a paladin but also a samurai,

and he gave himall the best magical equipment and would fight party members.it was awful. i got frustrated,so i bought the books myself and learned to do it on my own.i've been doing it ever since. orion: there you go.what was the other thing? matt: what was that? orion: you saidthere were two questions. matt: i forgot what the other one was. zac: there's another one

that keeps getting askedover and over again. if you guys could be a different race,what would you be? laura: a different class? orion: i think i would wantto be japanese because it would be a whole differentcultural experience. marisha: and they stay young forever. zac: i thought that's what they meant. liam: ukraine, definitely. taliesin: dutch.

liam: i change my mind about thatevery day. i think about what to doonce he kills me off. laura: yeah. i think i definitely,if i have to re-roll, which i don't ever want to have to do,but i would want to be a tiefling. taliesin: tieflings are cool. i like being token human.token human has been a lot of fun. laura: i know! i also like being a human.matt: humans are pretty awesome. orion: dragonborn for life.matt: (laughs) forever. taliesin: my previous characterwas dragonborn.

liam: i don't want to say, because i'm convincedmatt will kill me eventually, and i don't want to spoilwhatever i cook up. matt: okay.laura: oh, that's true. marisha: i might have to bring in a dwarf.it might be time. matt: if i could play a character,it would be a dwarf. probably a dwarf bard.i love dwarves so much. laura: you're so good at dwarves. liam: can we hearyour dwarf accent again?

marisha: well... matt: marisha,want to give us an example? marisha: (swedish accent)oh, you mean this dwarf? marisha: (same accent) this dwarf accent? ashley: it's a swedish dwarf! liam: (similar accent) welcome to ikea. travis: wow.taliesin: that was a dwarf chef. marisha: (same accent) hello!hello, welcome to kraghammer. taliesin: (imitates the swedish chef)

marisha: (same accent) where's the d20? orion: (scottish accent)she's the special dwarf. zac: i have a good questionto end out on. i also likewhat somebody in the chat room said that for critical role fans,you could call them critters. marisha: (gasps) critters! liam: i said that months ago. laura: i love it!taliesin: (cheers) ashley: oh, critters, i love you!

matt: oh, that's awesome.thank you, liam. thank you, chat. zac: so you guys have officiallydubbed yourselves critters, and by yourselves, i mean by liam. zac: the question i thinkwould be good to end out on is, "what would each of you recommend to themto tell their friends to get them into d&d?" how would you recommend other peoplepush d&d onto people? liam: live a video gamewhile drinking with your friends. laura and ashley: yeah.

laura: or hanging with your friends.you don't have to drink. ashley: yeah, but i feel that also the dm makes all the differencein the world. find a good dm. which, there isn't anyoneas good as matt. matt: or be one. that's not true.marisha: step up. matt: it's communal storytelling.you forge memories with friends. it's a really cool improvised storythat you all create together. liam: and playing with someonewho's not a crazy talented voice actor is still better than not playing,so find a dm and start a game.

start your first game. orion: i tell people it's not about math,it's not about paper and pencil. when you were a kidand you went outside and played all day and you were just a kid?that's what this is. it's just rememberinghow to do that again with friends. zac: that's what you fucking tell people. marisha: it's pretend as adults. taliesin: it's a game that you can playwith your friends that will create the kinds of bonded,shared experiences

that created the friendsyou had in high school. the friends you just don't get anymore.but you can get them by doing this. this is to makethat high school friend again. marisha: totally. if you can finda group of friends that you can openly play d&d with,without them judging you. laura: and even ifit's not people you know very well. if you find people that like d&d--so many people that we've seen online, and some of our friends,don't have d&d groups, and they find a placeto go and play d&d and meet those people.

honestly, i didn't know you very well,i didn't know orion very well, when we started,and now all of us are best friends. liam: now we're thick as thieves.laura: it creates that. taliesin: this is a group of peoplei see more often than any other group. laura: i know, we see each other morethan almost anybody else in our lives. zac: i like the hashtag #bondagefriends. matt: (laughs)laura and marisha: bondage friends. orion: well, hold on. taliesin: that's a whole othergroup of friends.

orion: i don't love that hashtag. taliesin: i see themabout once a month, really. laura: we've got to get going.grog has a session in the morning. zac: yeah, so i think that's good. taliesin: it's funny because--matt and taliesin: it's true. zac: i think that's a good timeto close it out. thank you, everyone, for getting usto that thousand shirts sold. matt: you guys were amazing.thank you so much. zac: every month, we're going to have

a new special limited-editioncritical role shirt going up on teespring, but we're alsolaunching a merch store in june that will have lotsof different critical role shirts, so you'll havemany options to choose from, and those will be shirtsthat live on forever, but the shirts that we sell on teespringwill be limited edition. you'll only be able to have themwithin two weeks. orion: i have a weird thing, too.

i'm doing a thingwhere if you have a ps4 and you follow me on twitter,@orionacaba, every 20 followers,i'm going to randomly pick one person. i'll tweet at you,and then tweet me your ps4 handle, and i'll add you to my friends listand we can play together. matt: there you go.orion: so yeah, hit me up. matt: guys, thank you all so much. sincerely, for watching,for being amazing, and for tuning into enjoy our silliness.

laura: we love you, critters! marisha: see you next week!

Just got my check for $500 

Sometimes people don't believe me when I tell them about how much you can make taking paid surveys online...

 So I took a video of myself actually getting paid $500 for paid surveys to finally set the record straight.